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Question for Married people? - 4/29/2008 11:01:57 AM
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Dirtyl3um
Posts: 28
Joined: 3/6/2008
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My question here is, how did you married people know when you had found the right person? Im sure you fell in love with them but, what im asking is how did you know its what God wanted for your life? I mean since God has a plan for everyones life, obviously he has a partner for you that he would have you be with. Im asking this because theres this girl that i love, and she feels the same way. I just have been praying and occasionally fasting over this and i was looking for some headway because if she isnt what God wants for me in my life, i would want to know that BEFORE it progresses anymore. I love this girl and i would never want to hurt her, and i just want to know if she is what God would have for me, and if shes not i would want to break it off asap. advice?
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RE: Question for Married people? - 4/29/2008 11:14:07 AM
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Auben
Posts: 1640
Joined: 4/13/2005
From: Where pines tower and cranberries float
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My husband (then bf) asked me two questions which I thought were very wise.
Can you live without me?
Do we work better separately or together?
That made me stop asking the question 'do I love him?' Of course I did. He wasn't asking if I loved him. He was asking if he was so much a part of my life that I couldn't do anything other than be with him. He was also asking if we made a good team.
Answering those questions made the decision easy for me. God, who seemed mysteriously quiet when I was asking him about marriage, seemed to give my husband the right words to ease my heart.
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Tamara
~Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time~
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RE: Question for Married people? - 4/29/2008 12:17:14 PM
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pbaribeault
Posts: 1097
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quote:
I mean since God has a plan for everyones life, obviously he has a partner for you that he would have you be with. Since I don't subscribe to this theory, I don't think I can adequately answer your question... I just thought you might like a nudge towards rethinking this kind of thinking... It might not be as 'obvious' as you seem to say.
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RE: Question for Married people? - 4/30/2008 12:04:29 PM
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Auben
Posts: 1640
Joined: 4/13/2005
From: Where pines tower and cranberries float
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That's a different kind of 'live without.' Obviously one's heart won't stop beating if you aren't a couple; however, if you can continue as you are indefinately or walk away then you aren't ready for marriage.
Some people have happy marriages that don't work on a team level (they can't work together). While they can live happy and somewhat separate lives, I personally prefer a closer, more companionate marriage. If I couldn't work with my husband I would lose too much of the feeling of closeness which makes us a great couple. Together we are more than we are separately.
< Message edited by Auben -- 4/30/2008 12:11:34 PM >
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Tamara
~Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time~
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RE: Question for Married people? - 4/30/2008 12:56:13 PM
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still4gvn
Posts: 594
Joined: 12/28/2005
From: State of Grace, WA
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auben: I think that is great.
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RE: Question for Married people? - 5/3/2008 10:44:12 PM
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keelgirl
Posts: 8
Joined: 5/3/2008
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I believe that God plans for our lives and has a future mate for everyone he wants to be married, this is not popular among many Christians, I guess they have not read Jeremiah. My husband and I have the best marriage. I belive that we were truely ment to be married and every day we are in awe of how blessed we are. We have been married for four years and have a toddler, so we aren't totally newlyweds.
If you both are ready to get married, and have prayed about it and God has said "ok", and they match the criteria you have for your future mate ( making out a list of what you want in a mate is essential), and YOU believe there is no one else you would rather spend the rest of your life with, then there ya go.
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