Not to lose her (Full Version)

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aul -> Not to lose her (4/12/2008 12:05:52 AM)

Hello, I'm twnety and going to college, and I met this one Christian girl. I had sworn throughout my life that I would want to marry a nice asian girl, and the only thing that would stop me is if I really did find somebody who clicked with me and who was Christian.

Well, it's mid way through the term. She's got attitude, she's very smart, she's Christian, and she don't put up with BS. Yet, she has a playful and nice personality. As being raised a Christian guy who is around little christianity, I have never ever met a girl that was so togethor and that strong. Yeah, I can tell she's a 'daddy's girl' or whatever and she's not perfect, but I don't care. I talk to her every now an then, I think she likes me, and I wanted to start getting to know her slowly by opening up to her and playing email tag when we're not at college. Oi, it's mid term and I don't want to lose her, but I don't want to push her. I'm not very open with my feelings as I'm a very private guy, but I have a small feeling that's telling me that I met somebody like her at this point of my life for a reason. I will not say I love her, and I can't say I 'like her'. I even find her looks quite nuetral, even though many people say she's gorguoes. Yet, I'm attracted to her somehow and I'm afraid of losing her. Not as a girlfriend, but as a person that I could possibly have a friendship or/and a relationship with.

So my question is, am I totally crazy? For you Christian girls, what do you feel is 'right' for a guy in my position to aspire to. I've been hurt before by girls that I thought would be a soulmate. I'm very scared and confused about my sudden feelings, and it's making me mad for me to lose my cool so easily. It's like, I'm forcing something that's bringing hurtful memories and something that could be potentially a let down from some 'stranger' I don't even know, whom I'm attracted to, all because I have a gut feeling that this person is an important memory for my life.

What do you all think?



ladyingrace1979 -> RE: Not to lose her (4/12/2008 3:43:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: aul

Hello, I'm twnety and going to college, and I met this one Christian girl. I had sworn throughout my life that I would want to marry a nice asian girl, and the only thing that would stop me is if I really did find somebody who clicked with me and who was Christian.

Well, it's mid way through the term. She's got attitude, she's very smart, she's Christian, and she don't put up with BS. Yet, she has a playful and nice personality. As being raised a Christian guy who is around little christianity, I have never ever met a girl that was so togethor and that strong. Yeah, I can tell she's a 'daddy's girl' or whatever and she's not perfect, but I don't care. I talk to her every now an then, I think she likes me, and I wanted to start getting to know her slowly by opening up to her and playing email tag when we're not at college. Oi, it's mid term and I don't want to lose her, but I don't want to push her. I'm not very open with my feelings as I'm a very private guy, but I have a small feeling that's telling me that I met somebody like her at this point of my life for a reason. I will not say I love her, and I can't say I 'like her'. I even find her looks quite nuetral, even though many people say she's gorguoes. Yet, I'm attracted to her somehow and I'm afraid of losing her. Not as a girlfriend, but as a person that I could possibly have a friendship or/and a relationship with.

So my question is, am I totally crazy? For you Christian girls, what do you feel is 'right' for a guy in my position to aspire to. I've been hurt before by girls that I thought would be a soulmate. I'm very scared and confused about my sudden feelings, and it's making me mad for me to lose my cool so easily. It's like, I'm forcing something that's bringing hurtful memories and something that could be potentially a let down from some 'stranger' I don't even know, whom I'm attracted to, all because I have a gut feeling that this person is an important memory for my life.

What do you all think?

O.k. first I'm not a college girl, I'm way older. So you can take my advice from that perspective. First you need to find a way to deal with past hurt before you move on with someone else. Remember that God loves you and He has the perfect person picked out way ahead of time.
Second, go slowly take your time, see this girl as a friend first, then see where things lead. It seems that you are jumping way ahead and anticipating failier before you even start. Concentrate on building a friendship, talk with her, get to know her, let her get to know you. Most of us women are pretty good, after a while, at seeing a guys heart.



funny_girl -> RE: Not to lose her (4/13/2008 11:15:20 PM)

aul, did you mention that she's a Christian? That's my only concern. First of all, you are fine. Don't worry. You've spotted a girl that you like and it's ok. No greater thing than being friends first. Build a friendship. If you're just too emotional and excited that you can't even talk to her than you're just infatuated with her and you won't be able to get to know her. You'll want to marry a great friend. In reality that's what a soul mate is. Someone that is your friend that you feel comfortable with and can talk too. Your past will fade as you begin to live out your life.



car2ner -> RE: Not to lose her (4/15/2008 6:23:42 AM)

No one wants to loose the potential of making a good friend or better. When I was dating, I did not like loosing the chance to get to know someone better. Even if they remained only friends, I still wanted the chance to chat for a bit. It is interesting getting to meet people. But not everyone else agrees with that.

You just have to relax and let the other person take a lead. Let them know you are interested in getting to know them and the ball is then in their court.



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