RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (Full Version)

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jlp1 -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (4/26/2008 2:13:13 PM)

quote:

That was then, and painful enough, but this is 2008.. you have to let that go. Why hold on to that? It's not making you a better person, is it?

That said, I think it's wrong to have a preference for one race or another, for whatever reason. If I say, I will only date white women or asian women, and not give my own kind a chance, that would be wrong.



I agree, I have not ran into any race that has treated me unfairly (thank God) and if they did I did not notice, maybe because I don't care (I only care about what God thinks). But I do have a preference; God fearing, and I've dated outside my race.



workermom -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/5/2008 1:48:07 PM)

StephenJ – I am glad you brought this topic up as I have always been in surprised about how much prejudice there is when it comes to interracial dating/marriages, especially by “Christians”. I am in an interracial marriage and we have been Married 9 of the 14 years we have been together. We have had many discussions from each races view about why people have problems with any kind of interracial dating/marriage. First we had to realize that many people hold grudges and pass them along to their children, thus causing more prejudice in America. Neither I nor my husband has reason to hold each other accountably today for what our ancestors did in the 1950’s and 1960’s. What we believe is to stop that generational curse by not teaching our child to hate or have prejudice against anyone for any reason or what happened in the past. Don’t get me wrong our child will know both sides of her heritage and where each race came from but not with the intent to teach our child to hate a race for what happened back then, something we had no control over. We can not continue to use the crutch of things are still unfair for a one race or another. We all have equal rights in America. I’m not saying people in America may make it hard for one race or another, but we have to have faith to do what is right in all our situations whether its popular or not.



imit8him -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/7/2008 12:15:39 PM)

WOW Super controversial topic, hehe.

[sm=wave.gif]

My thoughts are based on my co-workers and peers comments that interracial marriage and relationships are not a problem (and anyone who thinks they are have a closed and prejudiced mind), but that when racism or fetishism is involved in those relationships, it becomes worrisome. [8|]

In other words, there is no problem with my black or Asian friends dating interracially (or seeing others do so), but they do not like it when someone chooses a spouse or partner specifically to fulfill some racial fetish. I sadly knew of a classmate in school who did such things. This was a black male classmate in my English class, who said he only wanted "white girls"....Clearly, he had some whacky fascination with white women that was more based on fetish than real love. So in those cases, me and my friends see it was problematic. Otherwise, people should marry whomever they love! ...black, white, red, yellow, purple.... [:)]



imit8him -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/7/2008 12:24:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: imit8him

WOW Super controversial topic, hehe.

[sm=wave.gif]

My thoughts are based on my co-workers and peers comments that interracial marriage and relationships are not a problem (and anyone who thinks they are have a closed and prejudiced mind), but that when racism or fetishism is involved in those relationships, it becomes worrisome. [8|]

In other words, there is no problem with my black or Asian friends dating interracially (or seeing others do so), but they do not like it when someone chooses a spouse or partner specifically to fulfill some racial fetish. I sadly knew of a classmate in school who did such things. This was a black male classmate in my English class, who said he only wanted "white girls"....Clearly, he had some whacky fascination with white women that was more based on fetish than real love. So in those cases, me and my friends see it was problematic. Otherwise, people should marry whomever they love! ...black, white, red, yellow, purple.... [:)]


Ok, I just re-read the OP and a few other people's comments....I see what the question was really asking now. My personal opinion still standing....I have not heard too much about ethnic men getting upset with outmarriage, except with Asian friends in school. During meals, I've heard some of them say they were bummed out that Asian women seemed to choose outmarriage more than in-marriage and it was depleting their "pool" of available marriage/dating partners. It was an amusing convo to me at the time, but I guess I was immature back then. Of coursre, I reminded them that was not true, because they could outmarry themselves. But they did not see that as a liklihood.



imit8him -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/8/2008 2:32:14 PM)

Hmmm, I thought I'd clarify my earlier response and term racial fetish. ....What I was referring to was not a "natural attraction" or personal preference for a particular racial or ethnic group, but more of a warped attraction that is based on some sort of stereotype of that group of people or perhaps one's own self-hate, etc. Usually it is a distorted attraction. One that objectifies and stereotypes....I know it's kind of a complicated issue, but that same guy in my English class seemed to best exemplify this point. ...He didn't say he just preferred white/Caucasian women, he went further by pointing out they were the best and he would not date anyone except for them. I won't go into detail about his ultra vulgar remarks, but he more or less said as long as the woman "is white, it's right." We all thought he was weird in class, but he had these feelings and thoughts and was somewhat vulgar and open in saying a lot of these politically incorrect views. It was awkward, because he himself was black and he said black women aren't desirable, etc. [sm=aside.gif] In these instances, where there is racial fetishism, I think most of the black and Asian American friends I've had would be against it, but not if they're marrying or dating out of love. ...So I think attraction is one thing, but racial fetishism is like taking that attraction (to race) and making it the only thing important and nothing else matters....hmmmm....not sure if that made sense???



christiangirl0920 -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/9/2008 12:23:21 PM)

Well, by race I'm white but my family is sooooo mixed. My mom's mom is Filipino, Spanish, Chinese, and Cherokee. My mom's dad was Irish and German, I believe. My father was Irish and many other things. So here I have all of this passed on to me. But you know what I find comical? My little brother came out dark skinned like my mother and I'm white like my dad.

Anyway, in the other thread "in need of some inspiration", I talked about the guy I'm inlove with. His name is Roger. Well, Roger is African American. When he 1st came up and talked to me of course he was flirting. He told me I was pretty and he asked if I dated black guys. I told him no and he asked why. I told him that I really wasn't allowed to date at all and even though I had boyfriends previously they just didn't happen to be black. I've had crushes on black guys before but none of them had ever asked me to go out with them. So to make a long story short we started dating and fell inlove with each other and race had never been an issue. I used to wonder what it would be like to date a black guy. It's no different than dating a white guy. It's about the morals and values not skin color. And we are both Christians. My dad didn't like the fact that Roger was black. He had dated an African American woman before him and my mom got together and it ended badly. So I'm guessing he's basing it off of the way she treated him. But other than that, as far as Roger and I holding hands or displaying affection in public at school (before I started homeschool) or at work when I still worked there, suprisingly no one ever had an issue with it. No one that were mutual friends anyway. All of his friends love me to death and accepted me into their group immediately. And everyone just saw us as Roger and Christian, not Roger and that white girl or Christian and that black guy.

Some of my guy friends from school last year did have a problem with it though. They didn't agree with it. They said I should be with a white guy instead of a black guy and other comments. It made me so mad. How can you judge a person on just their skin color and know nothing about them? So I just stopped talking to them.

So having shared my experience, I am not prejudice and I see nothing wrong with interracial dating. I'm in an interracial relationship.



NoDumbBlonde -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/9/2008 5:41:42 PM)

I have a somewhat rhetorical question?

Is it prejudicial to "choose" to date within your race or is it merely a preference?

How about visa versa? Is it considered prejudical to date outside of your race as opposed to within it?

If one considers dating within or outside their race (their preference) then why is it that others will consider it something else?

Just a thought.
[sm=sadquestion.gif]



gaylel1 -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/10/2008 12:27:10 PM)

I wish Christians stop this thinking that you should date someone black because they are black or white because someone is white. That is utterly so stupid. Look, color should not matter, but unfortnatly and Christians included make such a big issue out of nothing. The secular world accepts interracial dating, why don't Christians?

Is is because many people and I'm not saying those on here still have not let go of the past?



Shugs -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/13/2008 6:36:07 PM)

Well, reference to the original question, I think the reason is because when (in general) black women see black men dating and marrying white women, the immediate thought is "who is left for me?" The general idea being that black women are not considered desirable or attractive as a general rule is a historical truth. Whether it is still true is debatable and IRRELEVANT! Beneath the surface the feeling is still there. So the idea being, if black men want white women, who will then want me?
The problems that come with interracial dating are secondary.



Fayree -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/18/2008 4:35:30 AM)

I am an Asian-American female--my parents emigrated here from Taiwan 25 years ago. I think a lot of it stems from the traditional culture in Asia. For them, honor is most important, and to marry outside of your race is seen as dishonorable. My mom (though a Christian), still has her prejudices against certain skin types, though the longer she has been in the States, the more relaxed her ideals have become.



Above_All -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/19/2008 10:11:40 PM)

It all depends how you define preference. I don't see anything wrong with personal reference. It's like personally preferring a person who is active vs. one who is lazy and a couch potato. I think many of us are so sensitive with this issue because they automatically associate preference with loving unconditionally...and that is generally not the case.



Ninjaearth -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/20/2008 1:00:01 PM)

The responses I read were all interesting (though I didn't read them all) and from most of them I completely agree; that is, I don't have any problems when it comes to interracial marriages or even dating. In fact, I would encourage it because it's not common and it helps penetrate the barriers of race between two or more races of people. While I have my personal experience to compliment this train of thought, I have a scripture basis that promotes racial unity (not necessarily interracial marriage). Revelation 7:9 tells use that John records people of all tribes and nations and tongues worshipping God in heaven. This is the big picture of God's heart, to reach all the nations with His Gospel for His glory. That means that all races of people are important to God and that we are all the same, in regards to our sin. But even as Christians, we have the freedom to enjoy Christ on the same level despite our nationalities and races. Galations 3:28-29 gives us the basis that tells us that all of us who are believers in Christ are all sons (and daughters) in the faith and that there no more separation or division by racial background (note: this doesn't eliminate the roles of the male-female relationship in a marriage). So, with that in mind, we should be free to marry in the Lord (whomever God has selected for us to love) as long as he/she is a Christian. For specifics, though, ask God. However, the generality is there in scripture for marrying someone. If someone twist it to mean that interracial marriage is wrong and a sin, Galations 3:28-29 tells that person that that black/white/asian/etc Christian is also part of the body of Christ and that doesn't disqualify them to be married (see 1 Cor 7 for principals on marriage and even 2 Cor 6:14-18 for whom to marry (notice that it doesn't give a race people but rather who the people serve and belong to). I hope this helps in furthering discussion on this topic. God bless!



imit8him -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/21/2008 10:03:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Ninjaearth

The responses I read were all interesting (though I didn't read them all) and from most of them I completely agree; that is, I don't have any problems when it comes to interracial marriages or even dating. In fact, I would encourage it because it's not common and it helps penetrate the barriers of race between two or more races of people. While I have my personal experience to compliment this train of thought, I have a scripture basis that promotes racial unity (not necessarily interracial marriage). Revelation 7:9 tells use that John records people of all tribes and nations and tongues worshipping God in heaven. This is the big picture of God's heart, to reach all the nations with His Gospel for His glory. That means that all races of people are important to God and that we are all the same, in regards to our sin. But even as Christians, we have the freedom to enjoy Christ on the same level despite our nationalities and races. Galations 3:28-29 gives us the basis that tells us that all of us who are believers in Christ are all sons (and daughters) in the faith and that there no more separation or division by racial background (note: this doesn't eliminate the roles of the male-female relationship in a marriage). So, with that in mind, we should be free to marry in the Lord (whomever God has selected for us to love) as long as he/she is a Christian. For specifics, though, ask God. However, the generality is there in scripture for marrying someone. If someone twist it to mean that interracial marriage is wrong and a sin, Galations 3:28-29 tells that person that that black/white/asian/etc Christian is also part of the body of Christ and that doesn't disqualify them to be married (see 1 Cor 7 for principals on marriage and even 2 Cor 6:14-18 for whom to marry (notice that it doesn't give a race people but rather who the people serve and belong to). I hope this helps in furthering discussion on this topic. God bless!


I really like Ninja's emphasis on God's loving heart for people of all races and how we ought to view relationships. As long as the person is a Christian and we love them for who they are, race should not matter at all in choosing marriage partners. Race does not matter to God. (in a negative way) He created us each unique and special and one day we'll all equally worship Him in Heaven as one unified body.

It can be hard to keep these things in perspective in a fallen world and how society's norms and pressures affect us, but I liked Ninja's reminder for us to see this through God's eyes. [sm=icon_smile_approve.gif][sm=heart.gif][sm=icon_smile_super.gif]



amyk -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/24/2008 3:29:55 AM)

I don't have direct personal experience with this, but I don't have any problem with people of whatever color dating someone else of whatever color. I'm not sure, though, that if someone chooses to date within their own ethnicity that it necessarily makes them racist or unchristian or something. The reason I say this is that they may just feel more comfortable with someone from their own ethnicity.

An analogy for me is this: I would not want to marry someone who was really rich and lived in a house with servants and chauffers and such. Even if this man was the most godly man I knew and gave away 99% of his profits to missions! I just prefer living in simpler ways and would not feel comfortable being waited on by servants. So if for some strange reason this guy asked me out on a date, would I be considered prejudiced against rich people if I refused him? No, it just means I want to be in a situation where I am more comfortable. In the same way, I wonder if some people just do not feel they can completely be themselves when they are in a household of people from other ethnic backgrounds. Maybe it should not be like this within the body of Christ, but really don't we all have situations where we feel more comfortable? Isn't that why we choose some people to be our closest friends over others?

Speaking of friendship, do you all think it is wrong for Christians to primarily associate (like at "best friend level") with people from similar backgrounds, ethnic or otherwise?

I do think that many wonderful relationships do occur between people from different ethnic backgrounds, so please do not take what I have written as meaning that I think we should all just "stick with our own kind." As most of us, I think, on this thread are saying what is most important is that the other person is of godly character.

Thank you for letting us have a civil discussion about race issues.



gaylel1 -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/24/2008 11:28:36 AM)

quote:

I don't have direct personal experience with this, but I don't have any problem with people of whatever color dating someone else of whatever color. I'm not sure, though, that if someone chooses to date within their own ethnicity that it necessarily makes them racist or unchristian or something. The reason I say this is that they may just feel more comfortable with someone from their own ethnicity.


I have to respecfully disagree with you because Christians and those who profess to be should not date someone not because they come from the same ethnicity, but they should date someone which God chosen for them. Your "someone from their own ethnicity" statement make people feel that yes, they should go with their own kind, which it should not be so.

I'm sorry, but I feel passionate about this issue because it should not be about the person's color, but Christians and even on here make it so an issue about the color because either they had not been in another's person's neighborhood or never been out in the inner cities or the suburbs because they have been taught this nonsense about "their own kind. "



Speaking of friendship, do you all think it is wrong for Christians to primarily associate (like at "best friend level") with people from similar backgrounds, ethnic or otherwise?

I think Christians should associate with people with various backrounds. Did God make us all different and have relationship with one another? Sure he did. We are to make freinds with those who are different than us. We are to be an example to the world.

I do think that many wonderful relationships do occur between people from different ethnic backgrounds, so please do not take what I have written as meaning that I think we should all just "stick with our own kind." As most of us, I think, on this thread are saying what is most important is that the other person is of godly character.

Thank you for letting us have a civil discussion about race issues.


Amy, some of your statements sound like, ok, interracial relationships are wrong and Christians should not be with those who are different. Many of your statements I disagree with because it sounds like you (and I'm not trying to attack you) and others feel that people should not marry and associate with other races, which I do not feel that God has not intended to judge people because of their racial make up. But you see, Christians are so, so hung up on this color thing and I also see it on many threads about race without knowing the person.

Then too many of the people who make these statements (maybe not you and again I'm not trying to put you on the spot) think it is wrong to associate with someone other than your race ( and that should be the last thing among Christians) or even go to a racially mixed church---and yes it goes beyond that



amyk -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/24/2008 1:50:24 PM)

Gayle,

I don't think I came across in my post above as I wanted to. What I am really trying to present is nothing about race but more about different cultures. Let's go outside of color here and maybe that will better explain what I mean. Suppose I am a person born and raised in big-city America. I love going to see all the latest Broadway plays and dining at fine restaurants. I am a career woman wanting to become the CEO of a large corporation who never wants children. (This is just a hypothetical situation!)

Now a guy from the middle of Montana who lives "off the land" and doesn't even own a TV. His idea of entertainment is going out riding horses. He like all his food to be home-cooked. He wants to have 10 kids and have them all home-schooled because he was home-schooled.

Now, if I somehow meet this man and refuse to date him because I think we come from just too different of cultures and backgrounds, this would not mean that I have something against men who live off the land, ride horses, eat only home-cooked food, want lots of children, etc. It just means that I think I won't be compatible with his culture.

This is all I am trying to get across - to me it is nothing to do with color. It is like dating someone from another country. If I were to marry someone from a country that is very, very different from the U.S.A. those cultural differences need to be considered, I think. If you just think that everything will be fine because you love each other, I think you may run into cultural issues that would best be discussed prior to entering into marriage. I guess what I mean is that you don't just marry the person, in a sense you also marry his/her culture, his/her family, etc. But these differences can indeed be celebrated and end up being advantageous! And in the Lord, these relationships can even more effectively model the body of Christ, in which there is no black or white, no Asian or African, etc.

By the way, if I came across as thinking that people should not associate with people of other races, I really need to completely correct that, as in my job, I primarily associate with people of other ethnic backgrounds, and I have very dear friends who are not only of a different color but from many different tribes and different language groups (I reside and work in Africa)! (I don't like to use "race" because I think we are all just the human race made up of different ethnic groups and people with varying skin colors.) Maybe that is why, though, I am so sensitive to the cultural differences. I know that if I were to marry an African, it would present some cultural issues within the marriage that would be very different than if I were to marry an American. Again, not saying those struggles cannot be turned around and actually strengthen a marriage. And it would not be something that would make me so "I would never date an African." (However, where I am you don't really "date" anyway, at least not the way Americans generally "date," as that is not really a part of their culture, so right there is one example of a cultural difference.) I do have a white American friend who married a black African man, and they have a wonderful, godly marriage! Praise the Lord for His plans and purposes and for His creativity in making so many diverse, beautiful peoples and languages! [:)]

I hope this helps clarify what I am meaning a bit. Thanks, Gayle, for your insights. If I am harboring racist thoughts, I need to be rebuked and I need to repent, because this is a sin that I do not want to tolerate in any way, shape, or form in my own life or in the body of Christ! I have prayed about this before and would appreciate your prayers that the Lord will convict me of any areas in my life related to this issue where I need to confess sin and repent of it.



Favored4Life -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/24/2008 7:28:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gaylel1

I wish Christians stop this thinking that you should date someone black because they are black or white because someone is white. That is utterly so stupid. Look, color should not matter, but unfortnatly and Christians included make such a big issue out of nothing. The secular world accepts interracial dating, why don't Christians?

Is is because many people and I'm not saying those on here still have not let go of the past?



It's natural for people to gravitate to individuals they have more in common with. In a lot of cases that will mean people that you share a similar culture with. Most likely people that you find yourself in contact with more. Whether they be of the same race or a different one. If your interests and hobbies generally expose you to more people within your own race, chances are that is who you will predominantly date. It goes the other way as well if your interests expose you more to other cultures.

The only thing stupid in my opinion is ignoring the person's beliefs, character and values in favor of their skin color.



Favored4Life -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/24/2008 7:57:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gaylel1

quote:

I don't have direct personal experience with this, but I don't have any problem with people of whatever color dating someone else of whatever color. I'm not sure, though, that if someone chooses to date within their own ethnicity that it necessarily makes them racist or unchristian or something. The reason I say this is that they may just feel more comfortable with someone from their own ethnicity.


I have to respecfully disagree with you because Christians and those who profess to be should not date someone not because they come from the same ethnicity, but they should date someone which God chosen for them. Your "someone from their own ethnicity" statement make people feel that yes, they should go with their own kind, which it should not be so.

I'm sorry, but I feel passionate about this issue because it should not be about the person's color, but Christians and even on here make it so an issue about the color because either they had not been in another's person's neighborhood or never been out in the inner cities or the suburbs because they have been taught this nonsense about "their own kind. "



Speaking of friendship, do you all think it is wrong for Christians to primarily associate (like at "best friend level") with people from similar backgrounds, ethnic or otherwise?

I think Christians should associate with people with various backrounds. Did God make us all different and have relationship with one another? Sure he did. We are to make freinds with those who are different than us. We are to be an example to the world.

I do think that many wonderful relationships do occur between people from different ethnic backgrounds, so please do not take what I have written as meaning that I think we should all just "stick with our own kind." As most of us, I think, on this thread are saying what is most important is that the other person is of godly character.

Thank you for letting us have a civil discussion about race issues.


Amy, some of your statements sound like, ok, interracial relationships are wrong and Christians should not be with those who are different. Many of your statements I disagree with because it sounds like you (and I'm not trying to attack you) and others feel that people should not marry and associate with other races, which I do not feel that God has not intended to judge people because of their racial make up. But you see, Christians are so, so hung up on this color thing and I also see it on many threads about race without knowing the person.

Then too many of the people who make these statements (maybe not you and again I'm not trying to put you on the spot) think it is wrong to associate with someone other than your race ( and that should be the last thing among Christians) or even go to a racially mixed church---and yes it goes beyond that


In my opinion it's not Christians who are hung up on race, but the world we live in is and to deny it would simply be living in denial. Two people being Christian doesn't automatically make them compatible, there are many factors involved in what makes two individuals "equally yoked." And yes, being of the same culture will allow for some commonalities that otherwise may not be there.

And as far as friendships go, they too are typically based on a strong common bond. Something that the individuals have in common. Maybe it's that their both mothers, or both like the same band, or both love baking, or took up the same major in college. Yes there is plenty to learn from diversity, but it's what we have in common that brings us together in the first place.

I believe that God gave us all preferences for a reason, but that's all they are preferences. Doesn't mean you're not open to other ethnicities. I believe that God will place you in a position to get to know the one He has for you, that will override any set image someone may have had in their mind as to who their spouse should be.

In response to the OP, yes it's true. Some people don't like to see others within their race dating outside of it. I see that as lack of self-esteem on a large scale level. But again, I've heard people say they wouldn't date within their own race because of this problem with them or that problem and they're tired of dealing with it. That to me is stereotyping your own race.

Like others have said, I personally, don't have a problem with people dating outside their race. What bothers me is when people feel they need to make excuses as to why they chose to date or marry who they did by putting down people within their race.



gaylel1 -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/25/2008 11:43:14 AM)

First of all, I think preferences is one of the most ridiculous criteria to find someone. This is why I stopped looking for people, especially online and especially on these so-called Christian web sites because if you are the wrong race, which I am and don't fit the person's criteria, especially when you are a committed believer, forget about finding someone all together. That is my experience in finding someone.





Favored4Life -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/30/2008 7:25:36 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gaylel1

First of all, I think preferences is one of the most ridiculous criteria to find someone. This is why I stopped looking for people, especially online and especially on these so-called Christian web sites because if you are the wrong race, which I am and don't fit the person's criteria, especially when you are a committed believer, forget about finding someone all together. That is my experience in finding someone.





We have preferences in everything. In what we wear, in what we eat, where we live.........everything. So it only makes sense that we would have preferences in who we spend the rest of our lives with. If you don't have preferences where do you even start looking? You can't see a person's character and dedication to God from the start. Those things take time, and if you aren't attracted to someone, why force it?

Everyone has to accept the fact that not everyone will be attracted to you for one reason or another. So what? If they aren't attracted to you then they're not the one anyway. The one that God has for you will be able to see for who you are in your entirety and love you for it all. Who cares what most people's criteria is? When we trust in God for a mate, we can bypass the frustration and disappointments of the past.



HellHathNoFuryAtAll -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/30/2008 8:21:37 PM)

In Asian Americans, especially, there are some groups that frown on interracial relationships. It really depends on your family's traditions and over-all rules of thumb. I know (especially here in the south) that there are some Caucasian families that also portray a certain level of racism when it comes to interracial mingling. It really has nothing to do with color, but more so how interracial coupling is perceived by an individual or group. In other words, it's a matter of preference. Take the Irish for example, most Irish don't condone anything but Irish marrying Irish. Irish isn't a color, it's a genealogy. God created us ALL equal. No matter where we're from or what we look like...it's all the same to him. Just remember that some people don't have the capacity to look beyond outer-appearance.



amyk -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (5/31/2008 2:38:37 PM)

This is a question for whoever wants to answer: Do you all think it would be more in accordance with God's will or less in accordance with God's will if we had no distinct cultures (or is it just a neutral thing, neither more nor less in accordance with God's will)? Is it sinful to not be willing to marry outside of your own culture or is it sinful to preserve one's culture, identity, etc. by not wanting to marry outside of your own culture? Or is it maybe only wrong to do that if you are purposely looking to build a family only with someone of your own culture? Is it a good thing if cultures become indistinct because of intermarriage, or is it possible for children who are bi-cultural to then marry other bi-cultural people and transmit 4 cultures to their children? Or do they just end up becoming a completely different culture which is a mix of the other cultures?

Maybe all of this is a topic for another thread?



Ninjaearth -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (6/1/2008 7:02:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: amyk

This is a question for whoever wants to answer: Do you all think it would be more in accordance with God's will or less in accordance with God's will if we had no distinct cultures (or is it just a neutral thing, neither more nor less in accordance with God's will)? Is it sinful to not be willing to marry outside of your own culture or is it sinful to preserve one's culture, identity, etc. by not wanting to marry outside of your own culture? Or is it maybe only wrong to do that if you are purposely looking to build a family only with someone of your own culture? Is it a good thing if cultures become indistinct because of intermarriage, or is it possible for children who are bi-cultural to then marry other bi-cultural people and transmit 4 cultures to their children? Or do they just end up becoming a completely different culture which is a mix of the other cultures?

Maybe all of this is a topic for another thread?


The Scriptural answer to this is no, as nothing in Scripture forbids marrying outside one's culture, unless you are Israel. For Gentiles, in terms of the New Covenant, it refers to unbelievers. Culturally speaking, however, I think it's still a matter of one's conscience and one's own desire to either marry outside a culture or remain within. Like many things, reasons for either one should be evaluated (personally) to make sure you're marrying anyone for the right reason. For Christians to marry non-Christians is a sin, except if the two are married and are not Christian and then become saved during. To say that it's sinful to intermarry or outer marry is erring greatly in the understanding the unity in which God brings all races together in Jesus Christ.



amyk -> RE: A question for all African American and Asian Americans. (6/2/2008 10:07:59 PM)

In case anyone wonders, I do not think it is a bad thing to marry outside of one's culture. I love it that there are a variety of cultures, but I do not necessarily think it is a tragedy if one culture fades away due to intermarrying, etc. (although it is a tragedy if a culture fades away because its people are targeted for genocide).



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