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T.I.L. -> RE: Is Discussing Looks Wrong? (5/13/2008 1:41:27 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: RichLP quote:
ORIGINAL: T.I.L. This might be a slightly different take from the OP, but it's something that bothers me. One of my church friends will say slight asides about people, for example: 'she's sweet, but it must be really hard for unattractive people like her to date (or whatever).' It's just a statement, that doesn't turn into a conversation. However, it bothers me that she does this. She's done it more than once, and there are times I just want to tell her to stop thinking that way! Do any of you feel as though this behavior deserves to be addressed? Because part of me think it's just her inability to think before she speaks... It may need addressing. Because one day it might backfire - someone she says that in front of may TELL the given 'sweet' person about the comment. Friendship and fellowship will suffer damage, as such comments - as ANY comments - can never be taken back once uttered. It could well be she doesn't pause before speaking. It may simple be one unhealthy, rooted habit she needs to rid herself of. Or, it may be insecurity about her own appearance, which she attempts to salve by putting down the appearance of others. And IF this woman is attractive, she most probably knows it - and then it makes her look like a monster, because by doing so she is putting down others for being "low" on something she is "high" on. This is cruel and heartless. Thanks RichLP! And you are right. I would never tell someone something she said about them, but that doesn't mean other's wouldn't. And she is attractive, and says these things in a way that lump me in with her... and I just don't think that way about others! I tend to focus on who a person is more inside than out. I don't 'feel sorry' for someone because of their looks... Anyway, I will let the discussion get back to the original subject.
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