sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (Full Version)

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OneOfHisJewels -> sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 2:12:39 AM)

What do you think of the morality and ethics of purposefully not having children biologically, and yet still trying to adopt? And even of having a sterilization before kids? You see, I am not married, and I am 36, and I would like to marry. I would also like to be a mother. However, due to my age, and due to medical issues I have had, some related to the reproductive system, and some not, I am just more and more getting to the point where I really don't want biological children, because I don't want to take the risk of having a child with severe health problems and/or disabilities/deformities. I think I would prefer adopting one or two kids, if I do marry (I've even thought about adopting 1 kid if I stay single, but that is another thread), and be able to go through an adoption agency and request a healthy child. Before anyone jumps on me for that, keep in mind, I do have a severely disabled sister, and while I love her dearly, I just don't want to go through that again. Yes I know, even a healthy child could get in an accident, but let's not get TOO speculative. Some people say this is ok, and some people say all married couples should try for at least one or two of their own, but I'm getting to the point where I don't necessarily agree with that. Thoughts?



Random -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 5:59:26 AM)

I think it is admirable to be willing to raise a child that is not your own, so there is nothing wrong with adopting even if you are able to have a child biologically.

What is a QF?



landabee -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 8:32:38 AM)

QF= Quiverfull

To the OP:

I assume that you are a Christian woman. I say: pray and follow God's leading. [:)]

Having a biological child is not the measure of a woman's righteousness. [;)]


God bless.



WesP -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 8:45:07 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: landabee

QF= Quiverfull

To the OP:

I assume that you are a Christian woman. I say: pray and follow God's leading. [:)]

Having a biological child is not the measure of a woman's righteousness. [;)]


God bless.


Absolutely!



stellaluna -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:09:12 AM)

I'm in exactly the same boat as you. We haven't gone so far as to consider sterilization, but I would not blame anyone for doing so and then adopting.



Tinkerbell_ -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:14:47 AM)

I don't want anymore biological children, but I wouldn't be opposed to adopting some older children. Even though I'm fairly young, I enjoy the fact that my children will graduate from high school before I'm 40. I don't like the idea of starting over when my children are approaching their teens, even though I know many people who do.



OneOfHisJewels -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:22:08 AM)

That's cool, Tink, although, I personally would still prefer to adopt a baby...doesn't have to be only hours old, or anything, but at least 2 or below. For you, that makes sense, cause you already had two kids that started out as babies. For me, even though I don't want to take the pregnancy risks, I would still like to start off with my kids as babies.



OneOfHisJewels -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:33:18 AM)

quote:

Forgive my ignorance here - I'm a banker not a climatologist.

Isn't the issue as much the rate of change in CO2 levels as it is the gross level of CO2?



HUH??????????????????????? I do not see what that has to do with the topic AT ALL.



ta_mosquito -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:35:01 AM)

Uhhh - GroupW - did you have forums blur? [;)]



GroupW -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 11:51:00 AM)

Whoa! Forums blur BIG TIME.

Carry on folks!



hotsaucygma -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 1:48:15 PM)

OOHJ, I do not see any reason not to adopt rather than have biological children, I also don't see a reason not to adopt as a single parent. If you are thinking in that direction though, you might want to check with local adoption agencies, sometimes there are age limitations to be an adoptive parent. At 36 you are hardly old, [:D], but if there are long waiting lists to adopt a healthy child you may run into a problem if you wait to start the proceedings.



LCannon -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 2:17:32 PM)

Actually Jewels you don't have to 'ask permission' from others for not procreating or anything else other than obedience. People will think what they will; we can't live our lives according to their exceptions just be sure you're firm in yours. Courage...



bluestone -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 2:31:02 PM)

NOthing wrong with it, and I have always felt that Christians that can afford to adopt should consider it.

A child raised in a home is better off than a child raised in the government system any day.



OneOfHisJewels -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 2:59:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hotsaucygma

OOHJ, I do not see any reason not to adopt rather than have biological children, I also don't see a reason not to adopt as a single parent. If you are thinking in that direction though, you might want to check with local adoption agencies, sometimes there are age limitations to be an adoptive parent. At 36 you are hardly old, [:D], but if there are long waiting lists to adopt a healthy child you may run into a problem if you wait to start the proceedings.




Actually, I've seen ads for agencies that have no age limit. I'm not going to go on a waiting list right now, because I'm not in a position to adopt right now.



crankius -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 3:12:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: landabee

QF= Quiverfull

To the OP:

I assume that you are a Christian woman. I say: pray and follow God's leading. [:)]

Having a biological child is not the measure of a woman's righteousness. [;)]


God bless.


I agree with landabee! That's fun to say.



hotsaucygma -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 3:17:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels
Actually, I've seen ads for agencies that have no age limit. I'm not going to go on a waiting list right now, because I'm not in a position to adopt right now.
That's good. I just know in my area there can be quite a wait for infant adoptions. I hope all goes well for you when you are ready!



Qtman -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/2/2008 4:18:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels

That's cool, Tink, although, I personally would still prefer to adopt a baby...doesn't have to be only hours old, or anything, but at least 2 or below. For you, that makes sense, cause you already had two kids that started out as babies. For me, even though I don't want to take the pregnancy risks, I would still like to start off with my kids as babies.



If that is what you want to do then go for it. It is something between you your future husband if any and God. It is none of anyone else''s business. I admire you wanting to give a home to a child that has already been born.



landabee -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/3/2008 5:12:09 PM)

quote:

I agree with landabee! That's fun to say.


[:D][:D][:D]



SonInMe1 -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/3/2008 10:03:55 PM)

I could envision seeing sterilization as a sin. Someone becoming sterile so the risk of pregnancy wouldn't interfere with their "fun".

I can't see someone protecting themselves from possible physical risk being sinful.



Tinkerbell_ -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/6/2008 9:34:49 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SonInMe1

I could envision seeing sterilization as a sin. Someone becoming sterile so the risk of pregnancy wouldn't interfere with their "fun".

I can't see someone protecting themselves from possible physical risk being sinful.

Perhaps I'm a bit slow...but I'm not sure I understand what you mean by the bolded statement. Would you explain it please? [:)]



StephK -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/6/2008 10:11:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_

I don't want anymore biological children, but I wouldn't be opposed to adopting some older children. Even though I'm fairly young, I enjoy the fact that my children will graduate from high school before I'm 40. I don't like the idea of starting over when my children are approaching their teens, even though I know many people who do.


My sister thought the same thing too! Then she got a surprise. What a great surprise she's been too. [:D]

As far as the OP, pray about it and follow God's lead.



Focusing -> RE: sterilization question..this is NOT for the QF's (5/8/2008 3:48:10 PM)

OOHJ ... good question.

I have always said that if someone doesn't want to have children, then they should not have children. Some people are not able to, or don't desire to for whatever reasons, and wanting to adopt instead is a fine choice.

Since you have health issues to keep in mind, pray about the sterilization. If that's the route you go, I think that's fine, but it should be something discussed with your husband should you marry.


quote:

A child raised in a home is better off than a child raised in the government system any day.

Amen!



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