RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (Full Version)

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mutinywxgirl -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 6:56:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: followtheLeader

quote:

ORIGINAL: trainfan

quote:

ORIGINAL: mutinywxgirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: trainfan

I thought of one.

What is the deal with women who get all dressed up in a dress or skirt and nice top and then wear tennis shoes and ankle high white socks?


Well, if/when you're commuting, it's a must - espeically when you have a long walk from the bus/train to your place of business. But when you're there, you need to change into your heels, otherwise it does look a bit "odd".

I had to do that when I was in NYC.

Craig, is that what you were thinking about?


Yes but I have seen a number of women who don't change out of them. That is what I was thinking of.

They must have a very loose dress code. I had to change out of mine.

As did I!



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 6:57:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PreserveWildlife

quote:

I think what they are looking for is, can you tell me the truth, in a way I can receive it? Can you compose an appropriate answer that is both truthful and loving?
OK, then why do we get punished if we make a mistake in coming up with the perfect answer? Why not look to the meaning of what's said instead of merely the words?

I'm only guessing because this is really not my way of doing things.

I think it comes from insecurity. They want to know that no matter what, you will love them and will find them attractive.



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:01:31 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PreserveWildlife

Many times when I've overheard a woman's conversation with another (usually in the kitchen at work, in the hallway as I pass by, etc) they are usually sharing intimate details of their personal life. Why? And what happened to discretion?

I do not and will never understand this. I have witnessed it also.



kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:04:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemaromans

quote:

ORIGINAL: utilityfielder
OK I will go for it:

When a woman asks a guy how she looks in an outfit, does she want an honest answer?

Absolutely! (At least I do)


me too! always be honest. if it's not great...just say it nicely. "that's nice, dear...but i don't like it as well as the red one. i love you in red!" blah blah blah



collie1 -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:05:59 PM)

If I was talking about something that personal, I would want to make sure I couldn't be overheard and if someone was walking by that I didn't want to have hear the sordid details I would stop talking until they passed by.
Is it a generational thing?



PreserveWildlife -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:07:05 PM)

OK, here's a variant.

Ladies, say you buy something for your guy but he doesn't want it (and never asked for such before). How does he tell you without getting in the doghouse?



kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:10:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: trainfan

I thought of one.

What is the deal with women who get all dressed up in a dress or skirt and nice top and then wear tennis shoes and ankle high white socks?


from personal experience...the ONLY time i'd be caught dead wearing that is when i commuted into chicago to work. i'd wear tennies and socks (or boots in winter) so 1) my quite expensive work high heels didn't get unneccessarily worn, and 2) to prevent runs in my stockings (getting kicked, crossing my legs on the train, etc), and 3) comfort for walking the 15 mins from the train station to the office.



collie1 -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:10:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PreserveWildlife

OK, here's a variant.

Ladies, say you buy something for your guy but he doesn't want it (and never asked for such before). How does he tell you without getting in the doghouse?

Sorry, the doghouse it is. I am overyly sensitive. The right thing would be for me to never buy him anything that he had shown no interest in.



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:13:06 PM)

quote:

OK, here's a variant.

Ladies, say you buy something for your guy but he doesn't want it (and never asked for such before). How does he tell you without getting in the doghouse?


What the? Who the? What the? [sm=shakinghead.gif][8D]

My hubby was Italian, he held very little back. LOL I just got used to it.



PreserveWildlife -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:15:31 PM)

quote:

Sorry, the doghouse it is. I am overyly sensitive. The right thing would be for me to never buy him anything that he had shown no interest in.
OK, here's a followup. If a woman makes it easy for a guy to get in the doghouse, shouldn't she also make it easy to get out?

OK, here's another question for the ladies: Have you or would you make your guy sleep on the couch?



collie1 -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:19:08 PM)

To get out of the doghouse was fairly easy, all it took was 'the look' and he knew it and his son uses it on me too! I may be too sensitive, but I don't like to be upset with anyone either, so they balance out![:)]

I don't believe I ever even suggested that either husband sleep on the couch. I may have left in a huff and slept there myself until I realized no one noticed I was gone! Don't I sound like I was a blast to be married to?
NOT!



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:28:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PreserveWildlife

quote:

Sorry, the doghouse it is. I am overyly sensitive. The right thing would be for me to never buy him anything that he had shown no interest in.
OK, here's a followup. If a woman makes it easy for a guy to get in the doghouse, shouldn't she also make it easy to get out?

OK, here's another question for the ladies: Have you or would you make your guy sleep on the couch?

I have not and would not.

But here is the opposite side of that coin, would you stay up until all hours of the night, in order to resolve a conflict.



kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:36:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: collie1

To get out of the doghouse was fairly easy, all it took was 'the look' and he knew it and his son uses it on me too! I may be too sensitive, but I don't like to be upset with anyone either, so they balance out![:)]

I don't believe I ever even suggested that either husband sleep on the couch. I may have left in a huff and slept there myself until I realized no one noticed I was gone! Don't I sound like I was a blast to be married to?
NOT!


gifts are hard for anyone! only in the last few years have i been able to tell my mother "what were you thinking?!?! i will NEVER wear that! mommmmmm....(laugh)" a couple years ago, i gave my man what i thot (and was told by my bestest gf, whose husband was also sporty/outdoorsy) that he would like and appreciate: a skeet shooter thingy and clay pigeons (i'm so impressed i remembered what those were called...that should make up for the 'thingy' reference.). he opened it and just shook his head. "honey...it's great. really. i love it. but...uh...well...i already have 2 of em. BUT I CAN ALWAYS USE ANOTHER! WE'LL USE THIS JUST YOU AND ME. I PROMISE. IT'S GREAT! THANK YOU!!!!!" i just laughed and said not to worry about it. he kept the clay things and we took the shooter thingy back. don't even remember what he got. i didn't care. i tried and i actually got him something good...just already had two. i was on the right track. lol

and colleen....been there, done that! i ended up on the couch for years...and i KNOW he didn't notice half the time. didn't care the other. what's a girl to do? [&:]



utilityfielder -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 7:52:36 PM)

Ladies, would you expect your husband to buy you clothes for gifts?



WalkingwithHim2 -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 8:06:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: utilityfielder

Ladies, would you expect your husband to buy you clothes for gifts?


Only if he knows what I like.



Grace-N-Mercy -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 8:32:09 PM)

quote:

When a woman asks a guy who she looks in an outfit, does she want an honest answer?

I think this is individualistic. I do. When I ask a guy something, usually, I want a straight answer. If I get upset with the answer, then it's my responsibililty to re-ask until I'm satisfied with the answer. [8D] But most of the time, I won't get upset.

quote:

What is the deal with women who get all dressed up in a dress or skirt and nice top and then wear tennis shoes and ankle high white socks?

I can't answer for others, though commuting sounds like a good reason to me. However, I have seen this in girls who have to wear a dress to school; they don't want to wear dress shoes. Also, some women wear dresses for religious reasons (I'm thinking of Mennonite women), and they're wearing tennis shoes for practical reasons -- they have to do all their work while in a dress, and they can't wear heels.

quote:

Many times when I've overheard a woman's conversation with another (usually in the kitchen at work, in the hallway as I pass by, etc) they are usually sharing intimate details of their personal life. Why? And what happened to discretion?

I don't know... I think maybe we've lost the art of discretion these days. Maybe she didn't want to go silent and let you think she was talking about you.

quote:

OK, then why do we get punished if we make a mistake in coming up with the perfect answer? Why not look to the meaning of what's said instead of merely the words?

This isn't something I understood until recently, but when some women ask you this question, part of them really wants to know the answer. But if she gets a negative answer, then part of her wonders if she's really attractive to him at all.

Oh, I just thought of something... look at the movie Enchanted. When Edward knocks on the door, she asks "How do I look?" He says "Stunned." She says "No, how do I look?" She's looking for a specific answer: "You look absolutely beautiful." Guys, if a gal is wearing a new outfit and is beaming and asks "how do I look", there's only one correct answer. But if she's searching her closet for just the right outfit, especially if she's going out with you, you can be more honest. Here's another good answer: "I like to see you in the other outfit better" or "this other outfit matches your eyes." Don't worry, you'll get it down pat soon!

quote:

Ladies, say you buy something for your guy but he doesn't want it (and never asked for such before). How does he tell you without getting in the doghouse?

That's a tricky one. You could do what my son does and just tell me straight out you don't like it. I would expect honesty here. You could just say "thank you for your thoughtfulness, but no thanks."

quote:

Have you or would you make your guy sleep on the couch?

Never have, so I don't know if I ever would. I can't imagine being so angry I wouldn't want him in bed with me.

quote:

Ladies, would you expect your husband to buy you clothes for gifts?

Not me! Personally, I would prefer clothes buying to be done together over letting him pick out something for me, unless he has unusually fantastic taste in clothing.



ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 8:37:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PreserveWildlife

OK, here's a variant.

Ladies, say you buy something for your guy but he doesn't want it (and never asked for such before). How does he tell you without getting in the doghouse?


Preserved:

After appropriate noises of happiness (which he should be able to come up with honestly if he realizes she intended to bless him), he could take her in his arms and say something like:

"That was totally unexpected! I love the way you think. What were you thinking when you decided on that gift?"

That opens the door in a very positive way for her to tell what she was thinking ('cause she WAS thinking SOMETHING, guaranteed). This will make him understand what the thought process behind it was. Then he can use THAT to say:

"Aww, that really makes me feel good that you thought that. Here's something I'm thinking about that..."

And turn her reasoning into exchanging the item for something he'd rather have.

quote:

Ladies, would you expect your husband to buy you clothes for gifts?


Not really. I know what I like and what I look good in.

What I want him to do is TAKE ME SHOPPING. Make it a date. Tell me he wants to see me in something...slinky or professional, or elegant or whatever. I know you guys HATE to shop, but if you do it this way, if you show her you've been thinking of her, realize she needs something new or whatever, and take her and pamper her a bit...I promise. You'll be glad you did!!!

besiderself



WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 9:34:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: utilityfielder

Ladies, would you expect your husband to buy you clothes for gifts?

No. I like to clothes shop by myself or with my girlfriends.



DrivenbyGod -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 9:50:31 PM)

quote:

Some friends of mine, a married couple, are each other's best friend! They seem to go everywhere together and do everything together, though they do have separate interests and activities, too. They own a business, go to church, sing in the choir, and much more. They never seem to have a disagreement and neither tells the other what to do. There seems to be very little conflict, and I've known them for many years. If asked, she will explain that she's being supportive, and he basially says the same thing.

My question is, guys, how would it make you feel to be in this kind of relationship?


Is this couple from Narnia? Are you sure you haven't had too much cheese cake..? [;)]



DrivenbyGod -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 9:53:15 PM)

quote:

Okay, guys: I know none of you would ever do it, but whatever would possess a man to think there is any sense (or attractiveness) whatsoever in placing a part two millimeters above his one ear and combing six strands of hair all the way to the other side of his head?


This is a sin. I would shave my head and will probably have to one day... [8D]



John_O -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 10:03:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemaromans

Here's my first question: Guys, why can only the women think of questions so far? [:D]



Because us men know everything already?

(Waiting for the beating from the OH and the flames from the ladies)



kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 10:05:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemaromans

Here's my first question: Guys, why can only the women think of questions so far? [:D]



Because us men know everything already?

(Waiting for the beating from the OH and the flames from the ladies)


oh, honey...if that makes you feel better.... [sm=shakinghead.gif]



John_O -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 10:08:05 PM)

OK ladies here's a tough one.

When are we just supposed to listen to your problems and when are we supposed to fix your problems?



shemaromans -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 10:09:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

quote:

ORIGINAL: shemaromans

Here's my first question: Guys, why can only the women think of questions so far? [:D]



Because us men know everything already?

(Waiting for the beating from the OH and the flames from the ladies)

Ladies, please make note of the question mark at the end of his answer. No need for the flame throwers. [:D]



kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/5/2008 10:22:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: John_O

OK ladies here's a tough one.

When are we just supposed to listen to your problems and when are we supposed to fix your problems?


personally...90% listen attentively...10% advice/opinion.

don't just make comments like "uh-huh," "yeah..." "really?" [;)] instead, re-phrase and offer opionions "i totally understand...i hate when my boss ______________, too. i think you were fine in __________."

what's bad is when a man says "you should____________."...then just shuts down. [:@]

but i know when i'm wanting a gf conversation vs a hubby/man point of view. and i definitely have learned no one can FIX my problems but me...and a LOT of prayer. it's the sharing, venting, sympathizing, comforting...and sometimes just plain calling me out on something that matters most.



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