RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread)

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ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/16/2008 8:49:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Anyone notice that it is the women primarially asking the questions over men? Would you like to rephrase that as a question for the ladies so that we can answer?[;)][8D] besiderself OOoooh. Esther you are fiesty today![sm=purplelaugh.gif] [&o]Sowrry. It's what happens when I try to be funny. besiderself

WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/16/2008 8:55:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Anyone notice that it is the women primarially asking the questions over men? Would you like to rephrase that as a question for the ladies so that we can answer?[;)][8D] besiderself OOoooh. Esther you are fiesty today![sm=purplelaugh.gif] [&o]Sowrry. It's what happens when I try to be funny. besiderself There's nothing wrong with being fiesty! I was just commenting on the fact that you were. It's all good.

.Pammy -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/16/2008 8:57:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Anyone notice that it is the women primarially asking the questions over men? Would you like to rephrase that as a question for the ladies so that we can answer?[;)][8D] besiderself OOoooh. Esther you are fiesty today![sm=purplelaugh.gif] [&o]Sowrry. It's what happens when I try to be funny. besiderself There's nothing wrong with being fiesty! I was just commenting on the fact that you were. It's all good. I was just about to say the very same thing. Esther, you did great! Keep it up! (You're speaking for all of us, by the way.)

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/16/2008 11:01:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: .Pammy quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: followtheLeader quote: ORIGINAL: besiderself quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Anyone notice that it is the women primarially asking the questions over men? Would you like to rephrase that as a question for the ladies so that we can answer?[;)][8D] besiderself OOoooh. Esther you are fiesty today![sm=purplelaugh.gif] [&o]Sowrry. It's what happens when I try to be funny. besiderself There's nothing wrong with being fiesty! I was just commenting on the fact that you were. It's all good. I was just about to say the very same thing. Esther, you did great! Keep it up! (You're speaking for all of us, by the way.) i totally agree...you go, girl!!! [:D]

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 12:20:50 AM)
Why do women like singers and musicians?

WaitingforBoaz -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 12:28:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Why do women like singers and musicians? Years ago before I rededicated my life to the Lord.( I was 18 or so) I dated a drummer/leadsinger in a band called Moments Notice. He was so fun and so mysterious. Kinda the bad boy. It lasted about a month or two. That kinda thing is only fun short term. I am way too practical to be with a guy like that for long. Was fun for a while though.

BlessedAngel1983 -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 2:29:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Why do women like singers and musicians? I like singers/musicians because music is something very dear to me and is a big part of who I am.

ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 6:44:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Why do women like singers and musicians? My daughter and I actually discussed this a few months ago. There is a certain quality of frankness, honesty and self revelation that has to happen on stage for a musician to be able to get his message across. There is also very obvious passion for the message, whatever the message is. Passionate, honest guys who have the confidence and strength to make themselves vulnerable to the general public revealing some of their inmost self are really, really attractive to women. Of course, what's sad is that even though they seem to be honest, and certain parts of what they do require a certain quality of honesty, that doesn't mean they are honest people. But the appearance of those qualities is what is so attractive. This goes for actors, too, to a certain degree. So take a hint, fellows. Regardless of your looks, you can be really attractive to us. Be passionate about what you believe in. Reveal that passion honestly. Be so confident about it that you do not fear revealing it. That makes us [sm=icon_smile_faint.gif] besiderself

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 9:03:06 AM)
Well, I am really passionate about radio and music in general, now does that count? [:D] Also, there tends to be a certain vulnerability with posting in forums also, do you agree?

ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 9:08:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Well, I am really passionate about radio and music in general, now does that count? [:D] Also, there tends to be a certain vulnerability with posting in forums also, do you agree? At least in the Singles forum, Mike, I would say that holds true. Some of the coolest fellows I've ever met post in the Singles forum, and that includes you. besiderself

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/17/2008 9:09:45 AM)
Awww thanks Esther, you are very nice yourself! [:)]

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:33:20 AM)
ooo ooo ooo....is this my first opportunity to say (and i know i'll get this wrong!) GYTTFT!!? [sm=funny.gif][sm=funny.gif][sm=funny.gif]

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:35:19 AM)
Hmmm, me is quite confused!

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:37:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Hmmm, me is quite confused! with all the mutual-complimenting. don't people get sent to the flirt thread? shoot...i probably did that wrong. [:@]

Tinkerbell_ -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:39:44 AM)
Oh please...all I have to do is say "hi" and I get thrown over there. [8\|] Is it common to find yourself intimidated by your SO's father?

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:44:33 AM)
I guess that might be true Tink! Ok Kimberly, I understand now!

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:52:03 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_ Oh please...all I have to do is say "hi" and I get thrown over there. [8\|] Is it common to find yourself intimidated by your SO's father? i'm lost, tink? were you addressing me? i'm so tired...i have no idea to what you're referring. HELP!!!

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:53:44 AM)
I think I might already now the answer to this, however why is it women will come to you and complain about a situation, sometimes over and over, but when you offer a solution, they just ignore you instead?

Tinkerbell_ -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:53:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kj88il quote: ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_ Oh please...all I have to do is say "hi" and I get thrown over there. [8\|] Is it common to find yourself intimidated by your SO's father? i'm lost, tink? were you addressing me? i'm so tired...i have no idea to what you're referring. HELP!!! Oh no! It was a he said/she said question! I'm sorry for not clarifying it! huggles

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 1:00:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_ quote: ORIGINAL: kj88il quote: ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_ Oh please...all I have to do is say "hi" and I get thrown over there. [8\|] Is it common to find yourself intimidated by your SO's father? i'm lost, tink? were you addressing me? i'm so tired...i have no idea to what you're referring. HELP!!! Oh no! It was a he said/she said question! I'm sorry for not clarifying it! huggles Oh, well I haven't had much experience in the terms of "dating", however generally speaking though, yes.

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 12:50:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit I think I might already now the answer to this, however why is it women will come to you and complain about a situation, sometimes over and over, but when you offer a solution, they just ignore you instead? very often, we just need to talk it out. the process of telling the problem, asking questions (which are really just a means of expressing the options we've already wondered about in our heads), saying it out loud...it's not only a means of venting our frustrations, confusion, anger, pain, whatever...it's the equivalent of a pro/con list. sometimes we want your opinion/advice...sometimes we just need you to listen and show us you care about what we're going through. and usually...we know we still have to make our own decisions...whenever it is we're actually ready to do that. there's no real rhyme or reason to it, mike. women just verbalize more than men. it's just part of our process....our way of clarifying the situation in our own minds...working thru our own feelings. we just trust you enough to share it with you. we in no way think you're gonna be able to "fix it"...at least not most of the time. that is not your responsibility. your responsibility is to support us. there...i'm sure that's clear as mud, now, isn't it? [:D]

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 1:01:19 PM)
Ok Kimberly, I understand that, but what happens when you bring up the same problem over and over and over though? And you offer an answer but are still ignored instead?

kj88il -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 1:12:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Ok Kimberly, I understand that, but what happens when you bring up the same problem over and over and over though? And you offer an answer but are still ignored instead? my personal opinion would be she 1) has not found the solution...within herself, or from you...that seems right to her, or 2) she isn't honestly dealing with the issue and it doesn't matter what you or anyone else says...until she comes to terms with things within herself, it's just going to keep coming up...over and over and over. that could be reluctance to address the issue, avoidance of an unpleasant/scary/hurtful issue, punishing herself by putting herself in same situation over and over, failure to grasp the real problem, refusing to admit the truth to herself, wishing for a different outcome this time...there are all sorts of possibilities. but if she's ignoring your input...it's because she wasn't looking to you for a "fix" in the first place. it didn't matter what you offerred. it's one of those 'it's not you, it's her" things.

humbleinspirit -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 1:35:25 PM)
Ok Kimberly, thanks, its just that she has been going through the same situation for a while now, and I have mentioned to her even last year that another year will go by and it will still be the same thing, which has turned out to be the case. I have gone as far as to say that it will be the same exact thing next year too! And I agree with what you posted as well.

ShallbeRebuilt -> RE: He says/She says for Singles (May Game Thread) (5/18/2008 1:59:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: humbleinspirit Ok Kimberly, thanks, its just that she has been going through the same situation for a while now, and I have mentioned to her even last year that another year will go by and it will still be the same thing, which has turned out to be the case. I have gone as far as to say that it will be the same exact thing next year too! And I agree with what you posted as well. Mike, I would also say that it's ok to tell her "I can't communicate with you about this anymore. We've been over it many times. I'm sorry I have to remove my listening support from you, but apparently you need to get before God with this, and I'm not helping you move forward in this issue by listening. From now on when you bring it up, I will ask you to change the subject. If you do not, I will choose to leave your company." That's a loving way of encouraging this person to DEAL with this issue. Just because talking is part of a woman's process for dealing with things doesn't mean she's not responsible as a Christian (if she is a Christian, of course) to deal with it before God and let it go. My ddh would sometimes do this to me. He would tell me kindly but firmly that he just wasn't willing to listen to it anymore, and that I needed to take it before God. I can see this working even if this person isn't a Christian. In reality there's really only one Person who can help her deal with it. You'd be doing her a favor. besiderself

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