Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (Full Version)

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Hislittleone -> Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 4:09:35 AM)

I've been in a discussion on another Christian forum about co-sleeping (which we do) and was wondering if Jesus co-slept with Mary. I'm pretty sure that co-sleeping with nursing infants was the norm back then in most, if not all cultures. Does anyone know the answer to this question?

My husband and I have been told that co-sleeping will cause "arrested emotional development" in a child. [&:] Our son is 18 months old and is still being breastfed. I think the idea that he will have "arrested development" is completely wrong. I mean, if it would cause our son to be "arrested" in his development then what happened to Jesus? Was He "arrested" in his development? [8|] (Assuming here that sharing a family bed was the norm back ancient Jewish culture.) So that's what led to my question: Did Mary co-sleep with Jesus?



csl7037 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 6:16:26 AM)

Even if he did, I think that would have very little bearing on whether or not it's a good idea today. If you're looking for an argument to support it, I think that would be a weak one.



joannepir -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 7:22:39 AM)

I would bet that Mary co-slept with Jesus. I'm pretty sure putting a baby in a crib in a separate room is a western idea. It is a lot easier to "plug" a nursing baby in at night and resume your sleep. Back then, I would think it would be quite natural and would keep the baby warm too.

I also want to assure you that sleeping with your baby won't "arrest" his development. All four of our children slept with us until atleast 5 years old. All of my children are confident, secure, independent people. (they range from 7 years old to 22 years old).



sen10tious -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 7:36:52 AM)

csl7037 said “If you're looking for an argument to support it, I think that would be a weak one.” I would like to give you a concrete example of WHY that is (other than the obvious speculative nature of it being factual.) We do have a record that she laid him in a manger. The same folks who today will claim that co-sleeping will result in arrested emotional development are also going to make the claim that mangers are filthy and unhealthful and that Mary ought to be turned in to CPS.

Stop listening to the loonies who have arrested brain development and enjoy you kid. If your kid picks up on the ambivalence you’ll develop from worrying about it, then you will have permitted the kooks to create a self-fulfilling prophecy. Don’t waste your time trying to solidify a good defensive argument, just enjoy your blessing.

I don't think your question can have a definitive, provable yes or no answer. The best you can get is “It’s likely.”



Hislittleone -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 11:22:25 AM)

Thanks for the replies so far. [:)] My husband and I are very grounded in what we believe as far as our parenting choices are concerned. I was just curious to find out what the norm was in Jewish culture back in Jesus' day. I've been searching but haven't really found anything so far. I know Jesus was put in a manger but I doubt that's actually where he slept (at least not on a regular basis) since mangers were what the animals ate out of.

In my opinion, if it was good enough for Jesus then it's good enough for me. [:)] But even if that wasn't the norm back then, I don't believe we are wrong in our choice to co-sleep. It's what works best for our family right now.



lexie -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 11:41:58 AM)

quote:

My husband and I have been told that co-sleeping will cause "arrested emotional development" in a child.


Well if that were the case there would be a whole lot of cultures in which all of the children suffer from arrested emotional development.

My husband comes from a culture where co-sleeping is the norm. Babies sleep in the parents bed until they are old enough to fend for themselves in a bed with older siblings. It wasn't a choice but a necessity, as having your own bed was a luxury. Neither my husband nor his 7 siblings suffer from arrested emotional development.

Yes there are situations in which co-sleeping has not been beneficial in the long run but that comes down to parental decisions and is not the business of anyone else.



3cappuccinosmom -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 12:37:33 PM)

Given the culture, I'm sure she did.

And I don't necessarily think it's a bad argument. Not because Mary probably co-slept, but because the vast majority of the world's people, for the vast majority of history have done this--often out of sheer necessity or practicality.

We have not done full cosleeping but all my boys spent most of the nights during their first year in our bed. I also carried them in a sling or in my arms for a great deal of their wake time. They are *highly* independent and just fine on the emotional front. Some kids are clingy, some aren't. Where they sleep has less to do with it than how parents handle it when clinginess first shows up.



csl7037 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 12:42:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hislittleone

Thanks for the replies so far. [:)] My husband and I are very grounded in what we believe as far as our parenting choices are concerned.


I think it's a bit of a personality thing...

quote:

ORIGINAL: joannepir
All four of our children slept with us until atleast 5 years old. All of my children are confident, secure, independent people. (they range from 7 years old to 22 years old).


...This would've arrested my mommy development, not to mention my marital development, for example.

I blame some of it on being an only child...I can barely sleep with dh in the same room sometimes. What works for some would've driven me completely insane and vice versa.

You know they say now it'll damage them emotionally or whatever. Six months from now the "experts" will say something else. We can't put too much stock in any of these debates, IMO.



Consecrated2God -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 1:38:25 PM)

Sure she did--the Bible says so. Luke 2:16 And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph and the baby lying in a manger.

See, they all co-slept--in the manger! [8D]



Hislittleone -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 3:02:01 PM)

quote:

3Capppuccinosmom: Given the culture, I'm sure she did.


That's what I'm thinking. I've been researching online and can't find any info on it though. I'd really like to learn how daily life was back then.....especially for women and children.

quote:

lexie: Well if that were the case there would be a whole lot of cultures in which all of the children suffer from arrested emotional development.


Exactly.

My husband and I grew up in non western cultures where it was the norm for moms to breastfeed, share a family bed (or mat) and the babies were carried on mom's back everywhere she went. From what I've read so far it seems that sending baby into a separate room is relatively new--just in the last two centuries.

quote:

...This would've arrested my mommy development, not to mention my marital development, for example.


LOL! [:D] We each have to make our own parenting decisions based on what we know to be right and what we believe God's will is for our family. That's the most important thing.....following His will for us as parents. And I don't believe that His will is the exact same for every parent. Afterall, He created us with unique differences. So what is good for one family may not be good for the other, kwim?

quote:

Consecrated2God: Sure she did--the Bible says so. Luke 2:16 And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph and the baby lying in a manger.

See, they all co-slept--in the manger!


[:D] Too funny.....LOL!



Karaboo2 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/12/2008 6:35:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: csl7037
...This would've arrested my mommy development, not to mention my marital development, for example.

I blame some of it on being an only child...I can barely sleep with dh in the same room sometimes. What works for some would've driven me completely insane and vice versa.


LOL ... I, too, was an only child, and while I don't mind the kids being in our bed at all (unless they ALL decide to camp out at once and lie sideways), dh being in bed can get quite annoying -- he even admits his snoring can wake the neighbourhood!



Ephesians4_32 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 1:24:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God

Sure she did--the Bible says so. Luke 2:16 And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph and the baby lying in a manger.

See, they all co-slept--in the manger! [8D]


What size was the manger? I don't think Mary and Joseph climbed into it just to be with Jesus! [:D]

Luke 2 KJV
7And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.

Luke 2 NIV
7and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

A manger is a trough or an open box in which feed for livestock is placed. DICTIONARY



Ephesians4_32 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 1:49:42 AM)

Mt. Vesuvius erupted in 79 A. D. and covered the town of Herculaneum near Pompeii. One of the victims in Herculaneum was an infant in a crib. I don't know whether or not cribs were used at night.



Hislittleone -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 2:09:32 AM)

quote:

Mt. Vesuvius erupted in 79 A. D. and covered the town of Herculaneum near Pompeii. One of the victims in Herculaneum was an infant in a crib. I don't know whether or not cribs were used at night.


That's interesting. Thanks for sharing. [:)]



Consecrated2God -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 7:13:55 AM)

Wow, cribs sound dangerous to me! [&:]



Sunnymom -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 7:47:11 AM)

I am willing to bet a Big Mac that Jesus, Mary, and Joseph didn't have air conditioning or Breyer's ice cream either. We can only go so far when it comes to using the practices of the times as an example of what we should and shouldn't do. In one sense it's a good question, but it is one that even if it could be answered, what would it prove?



buckifn -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 7:54:01 AM)

I don't think they had beds...and I don't think adults could fit in cribs....but I think that adults slept on straw mats on the dirt floor.

I'm sure we wouldn't have liked to live in those times!



3cappuccinosmom -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 8:03:09 AM)

quote:

In one sense it's a good question, but it is one that even if it could be answered, what would it prove?


That co-sleeping doesn't automatically "arrest emotional development" of children, since we know Jesus turned out OK.

I don't have a problem with cribs or co-sleeping by themselves. I do think it's a bit arrogant though to say that cosleeping hurts development--that implies that *most* of the world's population for *most* of history has been emotionally deficient.



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 8:09:22 AM)

quote:

A manger is a trough or an open box in which feed for livestock is placed.

according to my friends that live over in Isreal and have lived in the culture over there for years, a manger as we westerners see it is actually a bit off. Usually it refers to a hollowed out stone trough for putting water in for animals...not feed for them.



Sunnymom -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 9:05:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: 3cappuccinosmom

quote:

In one sense it's a good question, but it is one that even if it could be answered, what would it prove?


That co-sleeping doesn't automatically "arrest emotional development" of children, since we know Jesus turned out OK.

I don't have a problem with cribs or co-sleeping by themselves. I do think it's a bit arrogant though to say that cosleeping hurts development--that implies that *most* of the world's population for *most* of history has been emotionally deficient.

I wonder when Jesus was potty-trained......



buckifn -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 10:35:54 AM)

quote:

I wonder when Jesus was potty-trained......


Since he already knew all things..do you think he needed to be trained, or just automatically knew to go when he needed to?



Sunnymom -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 10:43:38 AM)

Well, the Bible says He was made 'flesh'- so in order to be sinlessly perfect does that mean He had control of his bladder and bowels from the time He popped out of the womb?

I am NOT trying to be a pain-in-the-thread here, honestly. [:D] I think we need to be careful when we ask questions that can't really be answered.



Hislittleone -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 1:31:41 PM)

I've enjoyed reading everyone's replies. [:D]

quote:

3Cappuccinosmom: That co-sleeping doesn't automatically "arrest emotional development" of children, since we know Jesus turned out OK.


That's exactly what I was thinking. It's why I first wanted to find out what the norm was back then as far as sleeping arrangments goes. Now I'm just plain curious.

quote:

peculiar_lady2: Usually it refers to a hollowed out stone trough for putting water in for animals...not feed for them.


That's interesting. Either way it doesn't sound like something that babies would have routinely been put to sleep in.

quote:

Sunnymom: I think we need to be careful when we ask questions that can't really be answered.


I know these questions can't be answered with absolute certainty. At least not about Jesus or any other particular individual. But we can know for sure what the customary practices were with sleeping arrangments and potty training etc., right? I'm sure there are books/articles that speak on the subject (daily life back then). I just can't find anything. [&:]



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 6:10:06 PM)

quote:

I wonder when Jesus was potty-trained......

it could be that the culture was leaning more towards what is now referred to as "EC"...or "Elimination Communication". It's what my brother and SIL do with their two...and seems to be (from what she has shared) what culturally has been used for thousands of years by people all over the world.



OneOfHisJewels -> RE: Did Mary Co-sleep with baby Jesus? (5/13/2008 8:47:57 PM)

quote:

Since he already knew all things..do you think he needed to be trained, or just automatically knew to go when he needed to?


He still had to learn, because while He fully God, He was also fully human, except without sin. Just as He had to learn how to walk and talk. He could have also had the EC, like Sarah said, but not any differently than any other baby at the time.



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