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ORIGINAL: deermousie

Now is when you can demonstrate to your daughters how a Christian realizes they blew it and turnsto God for help to get it fixed. Be a visual aid! They will have struggles in life, and they will be able to look back and remember how Mom did it so they can do it, too.

Talk to your pastor, maybe get some Christian counseling, and root out the lies and strongholds on your life that are hurting you. Learn to tell the truth to yourself: you are saved, God loves you (look at Isaiah 43 and prepare to have your hair stand straight up), and you have value because Jesus died for you and knows your name - it's written in the Lamb's Book of Life.
The Bble will give you the truth to live by, so be there daily.

This is your homework assignment - get started, and God bless you. I am praying for you tonight. (((hugs)))

note: yeah, I've struggled with depression and poor self-worth almost all my life, and my kid didn't get the best of moms, either. But she is watching God heal me, so she knows God can work miracles in people's lives. And she's turned out far better than I had any right to expect because God did it; may it be so with your little ones, too.

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lightshineon,

Would you refresh for me the ages of your girls? Are they still young enough to be asking, "Am I pretty/smart/worthwhile" or have they pretty much decided that they are not? Can they join you in a study of self worth, or even in some 'group' counseling?

Here's the thing, my friend, I've seen you all over this board, and have a lot of respect for you. So I'm surprised.

I never thought I'd hear you say things that are so colossally arrogant -- and to you children!


Why is it that you think you are smarter than the God of the universe?


Haven't you ever heard the word "omniscient"?


Or is it that you don't believe the Bible?


Forgive me for the attention grabbing phrases. I know you believe the Bible, I'm just trying to get you worked up so I can hit you with this idea:

If you know what God thinks about His children -- that He loves them, considers them to be deeply worthwhile, saves them, calls them and grants them purpose... Who are you to just stand there and disagree with Him?

And I'm not talking about your children. I'm talking about you. Do you know 'you' better than He knows you? Are you some kind of exception to Scripture? Does the Bible really mean, "God so loved most of the world..." except you. And you just happened to be lucky enough to hear the gospel and get in on the "whosoever" deal... because that's only fair for Him to make it open for everybody?

Can you hear how twisted that is? I'm going to get TOS'd for heresy!

Just stand up and say, "I am wrong. The LORD MY GOD is right about me." Even when you can't see why, just trust that God is smarter than you are, and that His judgment is sound.

When in doubt, here's my best advice: Never disagree with an all-knowing, all-powerful deity.

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yeah, I've struggled with depression and poor self-worth almost all my life, and my kid didn't get the best of moms, either. But she is watching God heal me, so she knows God can work miracles in people's lives. And she's turned out far better than I had any right to expect because God did it; may it be so with your little ones, too.

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ORIGINAL: deermousie

Now is when you can demonstrate to your daughters how a Christian realizes they blew it and turnsto God for help to get it fixed. Be a visual aid! They will have struggles in life, and they will be able to look back and remember how Mom did it so they can do it, too.

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If you know what God thinks about His children -- that He loves them, considers them to be deeply worthwhile, saves them, calls them and grants them purpose... Who are you to just stand there and disagree with Him?

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ORIGINAL: elastic

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If you know what God thinks about His children -- that He loves them, considers them to be deeply worthwhile, saves them, calls them and grants them purpose... Who are you to just stand there and disagree with Him?

tell this to all the women in the women's folder who are going on diets...not because they want to eat healthy, but because they want to fit into a pair of jeans/ look good for their spouse/ feel prettier etc...

tell this to men in the men only folder who are only attracted to women with large breasts, or thin women, or blonde women, or 'feminine submissive' women.

tell this to men who won't date a woman with a wrinkle on her face, or a woman who feels that her only choice in life is to get botox injections...

and most people who do the above things are 'christians'

in our society, we are conditioned to fit a mold, and if you don't fit it then you are not worthy of anything. my mother didn't fit the mold and i grew up in a household of misery listening to her go on and on and on about how ugly she was, and how fat she was, and how ugly and fat I was (and am)..... all i can do is break this cycle for my future children. they will never hear me utter a word of disdain about myself, and certainly not about them. they will never hear me say how much i hate myself or the way i look. that is language that i have removed from my vocabulary.

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bible verses are nice, and remind us who we are in the big picture of things, but the battle goes on in our minds. that is where we have to fight the feelings of not being good enough or attractive enough or what have you.

it's not too late to reverse the damage you may have caused to your daughters. cut out the negative self talk. even if you feel that way about yourself, don't say it out loud to them. keep them away from magazines as much as possible and state the importance of being a beautiful person inside verses outside...beauty will fade away.

of course. my .02

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But Bible verses are not just nice.

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They are not just platitudes even though they might be spouted like that at times.

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ORIGINAL: manda59(courtesy of shelaughed)

“WHO I AM IN CHRIST”

I am complete in Him Who is the Head of all principality and power (Colossians 2:10).
I am alive with Christ (Ephesians 2:5).
I am free from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:2).
I am far from oppression, and fear does not come near me (Isaiah 54:14).
I am born of God, and the evil one does not touch me (I John 5:18).
I am holy and without blame before Him in love (I Peter 1:16; Ephesians 1:4).
I have the mind of Christ (Philippians 2:5; I Corinthians 2:16).
I have the peace of God that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
I have the Greater One living in me; greater is He Who is in me than he who is in the world (I John 4:4).
I have received the gift of righteousness and reign as a king in life by Jesus Christ (Romans 5:17).
I have received the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Jesus, the eyes of my understanding being enlightened (Ephesians 1:17,18).
I have received the power of the Holy Spirit to lay hands on the sick and see them recover, to cast out demons, to speak with new tongues. I have power over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means harm me (Mark 16:17,18; Luke 10:17,19).
I have put off the old man and have put on the new man, which is renewed in the knowledge after the image of Him Who created me (Colossians 3:9,10).
I have given, and it is given to me; good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over, men give into my bosom (Luke 6:38).
I have no lack for my God supplies all of my need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
I can quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one with my shield of faith (Ephesians 6:16).
I can do all things through Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:13).
I shall do even greater works than Christ Jesus (John 14:12).
I show forth the praises of God Who has called me out of darkness into His marvelous light (I Peter 2:9).
I am God’s child¾for I am born again of the incorruptible seed of the Word of God, which lives and abides forever (I Peter 1:23).
I am God’s workmanship, created in Christ unto good works (Ephesians 2:10).
I am a new creature in Christ (II Corinthians 5:17).
I am a spirit being¾alive to God (I Thessalonians 5:23; Romans 6:11).
I am a believer, and the light of the Gospel shines in my mind (II Corinthians 4:4).
I am a doer of the Word and blessed in my actions (James 1:22,25).
I am a joint-heir with Christ (Romans 8:17).
I am more than a conqueror through Him Who loves me (Romans 8:37).
I am an overcomer by the blood of the Lamb and the word of my testimony (Revelation 12:11).
I am a partaker of His divine nature (II Peter 1:3,4).
I am an ambassador for Christ (II Corinthians 5:20).
I am part of a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a purchased people (I Peter 2:9).
I am the righteousness of God in Jesus Christ (II Corinthians 5:21).
I am the temple of the Holy Spirit; I am not my own (I Corinthians 6:19).
I am the head and not the tail; I am above only and not beneath (Deuteronomy 28:13).
I am the light of the world (Matthew 5:14).
I am His elect, full of mercy, kindness, humility, and longsuffering (Romans 8:33; Colossians 3:12).
I am forgiven of all my sins and washed in the Blood (Ephesians 1:7).
I am delivered from the power of darkness and translated into God’s kingdom (Colossians 1:13).
I am redeemed from the curse of sin, sickness, and poverty (Galatians 3:13; Deuteronomy 28:15-68).
I am firmly rooted, built up, established in my faith and overflowing with gratitude (Colossians 2:7).
I am called of God to be the voice of His praise (II Timothy 1:9; Psalm 66:8).
I am healed by the stripes of Jesus (I Peter 2:24; Isaiah 53:5).
I am raised up with Christ and seated in heavenly places (Colossians 2:12; Ephesians 2:6).
I am greatly loved by God (Colossians 3:12; Romans 1:7; I Thessalonians 1:4; Ephesians 2:4).
I am strengthened with all might according to His glorious power (Colossians 1:11).
I am submitted to God, and the devil flees from me because I resist him in the Name of Jesus (James 4:7).
I press on toward the goal to win the prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward (Philippians 3:14).
For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love, and a sound mind (II Timothy 1:7).
It is not I who live, but Christ lives in me (Galatians 2:20).

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bible verses are nice, and remind us who we are in the big picture of things, but the battle goes on in our minds. that is where we have to fight the feelings of not being good enough or attractive enough or what have you.

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ORIGINAL: elastic
people do tend to throw verses out..but sometimes it wrings hollow.

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ORIGINAL: lightshineon

Hello, thank you all for wonderful advice. My girls are in their teens. One seems to have great self worth, but underneath you can see the evidence of the harm I caused. My main point, I guess was if you feel bad about yourself, do not express it infront of children. Once I was getting on to my youngest, for putting herself down she said " Mom, you say the same things." I have repented to the Lord, trying to get the words to say and talk to my three girls. Your prayers and verses have helped me. Yesterday, I felt so free, I even had a thought of going withot make-up, but did not. I just felt so good. It is so sick this world, my SIL has lost alot of weight, and she told my mother she was trying to be as thin as me. That disturbed me, because she is is nearly six feet, bigger boned, I am 5'2" with a small frame. That made me sad, I went and talked to her. She is smoking four packs of ciggerates to achieve this. I do not smoke btw.
The feeling of inferiority go further than looks, sometimes it goes to am not as smart or other things, so this can effect boys also. I am learning never to ask my husband, if I look fat in something. If I do I do. My house does not have to be perfect, that is hard, but my DD say it looks like a museum, and do not enjoy friends over. I am going to learn not to be so picky i.e. if someone puts their feet on the couch, with shoes off, I will not say anything. I am just going to get better, I know it. Thank You. I have confidence in the Lord. He convicted me of this behavior, so he is willing to set me free, and break this curse. I pray for all that stuggle as well, which I believe is many women, girls, and men.