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RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread

 
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RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/25/2005 12:28:25 PM   
sadiebelle


Posts: 247
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Northern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Crazy_Mom

I have been blessed in more way's then one.
I believe the Woman (ME) should stay home take care of Home, and Family while Husband is at work.
I make sure his Supper is ready when he gets home, kids r clean and taken care of.
And I do the Bill's and Errands, Appointment's. And anything else that needs to be done.
I know People think this is demeaning, some even called it slavery. I howveer dont think it is, it's the way it worked for Year's. I also understand many family's can not afford to keep one parent home, or there is only 1 parent in the home.
Like I said this is our Home,,,our Life.
It wont work for everyone....

It works for my family in this way too. I am the CEO of the household and my husband is the head. Niether one of us could function like we do now without the other one. If my husband left, I would be forced to stop doing the things I do now and go to work. If I left, my husband wouldn't be able to have things the way they are at home with me there running things. Both would suffer in either case and the kids would suffer the most.

_____________________________

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart O take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above ~ Come Thou Fount
Post #: 51
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/25/2005 3:10:10 PM   
oopsmartin


Posts: 1162
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Crazy_Mom

I have been blessed in more way's then one.
I believe the Woman (ME) should stay home take care of Home, and Family while Husband is at work.
I make sure his Supper is ready when he gets home, kids r clean and taken care of.
And I do the Bill's and Errands, Appointment's. And anything else that needs to be done.
I know People think this is demeaning, some even called it slavery. I howveer dont think it is, it's the way it worked for Year's. I also understand many family's can not afford to keep one parent home, or there is only 1 parent in the home.
Like I said this is our Home,,,our Life.
It wont work for everyone....


This is not demeaning at all crazyMOM. It is what works for you. It's not slavery.

Other families may organize their living a bit differently. We should not consider it demeaning either. Let each family organize their living arrangements in a manner that is respectful of each member of the family, honoring and supporting them and encouraging them to be all they can be in Christ.
Post #: 52
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/25/2005 3:12:30 PM   
momfree


Posts: 144
Joined: 4/12/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: oopsmartin

quote:

ORIGINAL: Crazy_Mom

I have been blessed in more way's then one.
I believe the Woman (ME) should stay home take care of Home, and Family while Husband is at work.
I make sure his Supper is ready when he gets home, kids r clean and taken care of.
And I do the Bill's and Errands, Appointment's. And anything else that needs to be done.
I know People think this is demeaning, some even called it slavery. I howveer dont think it is, it's the way it worked for Year's. I also understand many family's can not afford to keep one parent home, or there is only 1 parent in the home.
Like I said this is our Home,,,our Life.
It wont work for everyone....


This is not demeaning at all crazyMOM. It is what works for you. It's not slavery.

Other families may organize their living a bit differently. We should not consider it demeaning either. Let each family organize their living arrangements in a manner that is respectful of each member of the family, honoring and supporting them and encouraging them to be all they can be in Christ.


Wonderful quote oopsmarting. Very well put.

_____________________________

"Peace is the absence of anger"
Post #: 53
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/25/2005 11:12:47 PM   
oopsmartin


Posts: 1162
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Since men don't get there own thread on their "roll" in marriage, I'm importing some stuff from the other thread. Consecrated's last post was quite good.

quote:

A husband's role in the marriage: To open pickle jars, or course!

He's also the one who should watch out for storms and keep us safe at night. He's the one who should get us to safety. If someone should break in, he's the one that should go out and defend his family against the intruder. He's our protector.

He's our provider. He's the one who will work all night long if necessary to bring home the bills. I do work outside the home right now as well, while he is in school, but he works harder and longer because the weight of that responsibility lies heavier on him than it does on me.

He is physically stronger than me, and thus the man-type jobs fall to him. He is the one who puts himself in dangerous positions, such as patching a roof. He's the one who carries the buckets of rocks that I dig out of the flowerbed. He's the one I bring those stubborn pickle jars to.

As for the spiritual aspect, it is true that men aren't necessarily more spiritual than women. I've heard of studies that show that women are often the spiritual glue of a family. Yet, there is something so influential about spiritual men. I've heard more than once that evangelism efforts love to convert the man, because when you convert that man you usually get the whole family. If they only convert the wife, they may get the children, but not always the husband.


So can we discuss some more about the husbands responsibilities in marriage.

These were some great observations........
Post #: 54
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/25/2005 11:47:10 PM   
_Susan_

 

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A woman is to be "the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." -1Peter 3:4 NIV

in and out of the home.

< Message edited by _Susan_ -- 4/25/2005 11:51:29 PM >
Post #: 55
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2005 7:29:55 AM   
charity7


Posts: 243
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This is the way it has been in our home until Accident Day---Hubby now does most of the household chores, and I try to make money---I had to take over all the money matters and every major decision of the house hold---I dont like it!! Id rather it be a joint decision making as it was before with Him as the final authority---but life delt us a blow--its hard on hubby and hard on me but we are learning GODS Grace is Sufficient!!

_____________________________

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Have you heard--Isabell Linnane was Born on our Ann.!!We welcomed Dan in Sept!


God is Good All The Time!!
Post #: 56
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2005 9:06:38 PM   
oopsmartin


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quote:

ORIGINAL: charity7

This is the way it has been in our home until Accident Day---Hubby now does most of the household chores, and I try to make money---I had to take over all the money matters and every major decision of the house hold---I dont like it!! Id rather it be a joint decision making as it was before with Him as the final authority---but life delt us a blow--its hard on hubby and hard on me but we are learning GODS Grace is Sufficient!!


Sorry to hear this Charity. But you will learn that no problem is too great for God. And God is quite capable of speaking and guiding you regardless of how experienced you are, or are not. In time it will all get easier.
Post #: 57
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/27/2005 1:12:32 PM  1 votes
TammyIsBlessed


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I think that all (or almost all) of us would agree that whenever it is possible, it is best for one of the parents to be at home with the children.

How each family achieves this is up to them.

Maybe they work split shifts (if they need 2 incomes) so that one of them is home with the kids - though I would think this would be hard on the marriage and probably not an ideal long-term solution. (But if it works for you...!)

Maybe they do things the traditional way, with mom at home and dad at work. Though in this case - it is NOT good if the husband has to work super long hours in order to make ends meet - as not ever seeing dad greatly affects the children as well.

Maybe they do things the opposite of the traditional way - with dad at home and mom at work.

Maybe mom is a SAHM and also works part time from home to help dad with the income so he doesn't have to work 12 hr days.

Maybe mom works part time while Grandma babysits.

I think most of us would agree that it is NOT the best case scenario for both parents to work full time while the children are in day care - basically someone else raising your children (Though it may sometimes be necessary, and the best option for those with circumstances such as single parenthood, illness, etc). IF it is done solely so that they can live in a 2000sq ft house, own 3 cars and have a pool - I think they'll find the cost will be too high!

I personally LOVE being a SAHM and I do work from home very part time (piano teacher) while dh or grandma watches the girls.

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Post #: 58
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 4/27/2005 1:16:02 PM   
TammyIsBlessed


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BTW - I do think that OFTEN (not always!) the mother is better suited to be the SAHP (stay at home parent). Often (again, not always) the mom WANTS to be the SAHP more than the dad does.

Especially if nursing! (though I know she could pump and dh could feed the baby.)

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Post #: 59
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/6/2005 3:50:53 PM   
Fritzpw_Admin


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From: New Jersey
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bump

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Post #: 60
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/10/2005 10:03:44 PM   
HisLamb26

 

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Joined: 4/17/2005
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quote:

Since men don't get there own thread on their "roll" in marriage, I'm importing some stuff from the other thread. Consecrated's last post was quite good


I was wondering where the men's "role" in the home thread was myself.

If you want my honest opinion, I think "Roles" are for actors-I prefer being a human being myself, rather than trying to squeeze my family into pre-conceived notions re. "roles". But to keep it topical-for my family-my husband and I really just *do* whatever is necessary to keep our family ummm...."rolling"....LOL. We both contribute financially-we swing shift so one of us is almost always with the children, we both cook and clean depending on the who worked that day, etc.

17yrs of marriage, and 3 kids, and it works just fine. I really never understood why Christians get so hung up on this role stuff to begin with. I do think it an interesting and revealing point that there is no similiar thread for men. Christians seems to like to make an issue of this specifically where females are concerned.....I've often wondered why that is.

(things that make you go Hmmmmm...)
Post #: 61
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/10/2005 10:30:10 PM   
Harvie


Posts: 1779
Joined: 4/18/2005
From: california
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I thought DH's role was to fly planes, and my role was to decorate.

Who knew it was this complicated?

<grin>



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PLEASE PRAY FOR MY DEPLOYED HUSBAND WHILE HE SERVES IN IRAQ
Post #: 62
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/10/2005 10:33:01 PM   
oopsmartin


Posts: 1162
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Harvie

I thought DH's role was to fly planes, and my role was to decorate.

Who knew it was this complicated?

<grin>




haha in fact it's even more complicated than that.
Post #: 63
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/11/2005 2:28:21 PM   
MiraKurumi


Posts: 2
Joined: 5/4/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
My Fiance and I have a pretty equal role in our relationship. We both cook, we both clean, we both work to make ends meet. Though we've toyed with the idea of him being a SAHD if I get a position makin' mad money when we have children. Nothing against SAHMs, Just myself, I couldn't see staying home all the time. I'd go mad.

My own experience with family relationships was a bit odd because growing up, my mom stayed home but she didn't do any real cooking, cleaning, etc. We were in daycare (oh how i *loved* daycare) and Dad worked, cooked, cleaned, etc. So i'm used to seeing the dad take all the burden in child rearing. Call me weird if you like. :-)

But I see nothing wrong with moms either staying at home or working or doing some combination thereof as long as the kids know they're loved and can approach the parents at any time.

_____________________________

Blessings,

Kurumi
Post #: 64
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/11/2005 7:04:14 PM   
notmycity


Posts: 1253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Crazy_Mom

I have been blessed in more way's then one.
I believe the Woman (ME) should stay home take care of Home, and Family while Husband is at work.
I make sure his Supper is ready when he gets home, kids r clean and taken care of.
And I do the Bill's and Errands, Appointment's. And anything else that needs to be done.


Prov 31:27-30
27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.
29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.
30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

Don't be led astray by the secularists' doctrine. "A woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."

_____________________________

<><Topher
"I am a companion of all them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy precepts." Psalm 119:63
and..
"For here have we no continuing city, but we seek one to come." Heb 13:14 = "notmycity"
Post #: 65
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/12/2005 4:13:00 AM   
Keabird


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Hi notmycity, just wondering if you could explain your post - what was the relevance between the quote and the verses and your final comment? I can't tell from your post what connections you were making.

Thanks!

_____________________________

"The thief comes to kill, steal and destroy, but I have come that you may have life and have it abundantly." John 10:10
Post #: 66
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/13/2005 10:49:16 AM   
notmycity


Posts: 1253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Keabird

Hi notmycity, just wondering if you could explain your post - what was the relevance between the quote and the verses and your final comment? I can't tell from your post what connections you were making.

Thanks!


Crazy mom sounded like she was using the Prov. 31 paradygm as a model for her life. She also made a comment that some look down on this model. I was trying to edify crazy mom while encouraging her not to be led discouraged by the secularists (ie-those who don't espouse a Biblical Christian worldview). Hope that helps.

_____________________________

<><Topher
"I am a companion of all them that fear thee, and of them that keep thy precepts." Psalm 119:63
and..
"For here have we no continuing city, but we seek one to come." Heb 13:14 = "notmycity"
Post #: 67
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/17/2005 12:36:53 AM   
saagmom


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Joined: 5/9/2005
From: Northwest Arizona
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NASB
Tts 2:3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good,

Tts 2:4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children,

Tts 2:5 {to be} sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.

KJV
Tts 2:3 The aged women likewise, that [they be] in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

Tts 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

Tts 2:5 [To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.



Now, I have found for me, the best way to accomplish this is be at home. I get too easily sidetracked with life in general and before I realize it, my priorities are not what they should be. For myself, I had a real hard time when I first came home. I felt like I wasn't contributing to my family. I had a real hard time knowing that I had value especially because I wasn't earning an income. I had been raised in a society/ home that did not value the stay at home mom.

I have come to realize the importance and value of a stay at home mom - the "traditional" family structure.

The Proverbs 31 women did earn a living, but her home life was first her first priority. Who watched the kids when she was out doing business? I don't know for sure, it might have been servants or it might have been an older child who was capable of such duties, or she might have even taken them with her - what better way is there to learn business?

Currently, no, I do not contribute financially to my family, however, if the Lord ever leads me down that path, it will not be at the expense of my family.

In His Service,
Vic

< Message edited by saagmom -- 5/17/2005 12:41:00 AM >
Post #: 68
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/18/2005 9:54:04 PM  1 votes
DominicX

 

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Hee Hee! I absolutely LOVE this one!

Thanks for the giggle.

The greek word that is translated as "Head" was used as "source" or "origin" in ONE place... out
of the thousands of greek manuscripts of the Koine era that have been found.... And that was
in a POEM! LOL!!!!! Never once in the bible, though. LOL!!!!!

Sorry. That one just gives me the giggles everytime I see it. So what next?

Eve was blameless? Adam was actually created an hermaphrodite and divided? Genesis
3:16 was changed by chauvinist Rabbis?

LOL.

Whatever.

"Biblical" feminists are SO cute, even if the term itself is an oxymoron.
Post #: 69
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 12:25:56 AM   
bygraceiamsaved


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I agree DominicX.

Enjoyed your post and relate to it as well Vic.

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"Man is never sufficiently touched and affected by the awareness of his lowly state until he has compared himself with God's majesty"---John Calvin
Post #: 70
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 12:13:29 PM   
saagmom


Posts: 111
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From: Northwest Arizona
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thanks bygraceiamsaved,

The Lord has really brought me to a 180. I was completely feminist by the time I graduated high school. I truly did not understand why God had created men at all other than for procreation purposes, but the fact that he made them FIRST!? Well, that just blew me away!

Through a godly marriage and observing other godly men in my church, I now know that God's wisdom does work out for the best. I actually appreciate men now!

A friend and I were talking the other day, we really feel bad for boys being raised today. For these boys to grow up and be a godly man, they are facing some really tough odds.

In His Service,
Vic
Post #: 71
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 2:25:29 PM   
joint heir


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Feminism does not mean that women are better than men...just wanted to make sure that this was clear...because from the above posts it does not come across that way...

Feminism by definition means that women should have equal rights under the law..this is perfectly compatible with christianity...

but for women to think that God really had no reason to make men or for men to think the same about women would be a mockery of God's creation...

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Love thy neighbor preemptively
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Post #: 72
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 3:53:22 PM   
Fritzpw_Admin


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georgette,

Your post would be more appropriate as a separate discussion.

This thread is about the roles of women/men in the home in a more general sense and not intended to be relating directly to any one person's current circumstance.

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Post #: 73
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 3:57:13 PM   
joint heir


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Hi Georgette

I am really sorry that you feel so burdened...and it is not healthy to have so much on your shoulders....

I know that Fritz thinks it is better to make a new thread....so you could do that....or feel free to send me a private message....or someone with a little know how could take our posts and create a new thread.....

I just wanted to tell you that you are loved and not alone.....there is a christian book called Boundaries written by Townsend and Cloud...it is so perfect for your situation and completely biblically based...I would suggest that you go get it today..!


(((((hug))))))

_____________________________

**************************
Love thy neighbor preemptively
**************************
Post #: 74
RE: Women's role in the Home - One Stop Thread - 5/19/2005 8:51:17 PM   
georgette

 

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Man, you just can't believe what I went through to get to post that one....And it's not appropriate....Figures! lol
Post #: 75
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