Originally published Friday, 11 January 2019.
When I was pregnant with my first daughter I sat down with a mentor of mine asking for discipleship. I was newly married, newly pregnant, and not able to pinpoint what I wanted to be mentored about. Upon our first meeting, she started by asking me a simple question, “What kind of woman do you want to be?” She went on to describe the different parts of a person: Body- our physical self; Soul- made up of mind, will, and emotions; and Spirit- our spiritual self where Christ dwells.
That get together inspired and encouraged me greatly, pointing out things I had never understood before. I pondered her question, but I do not think I came up with a clear answer at that point in my life.
What kind of woman do you want to be?
Reflecting upon that question now, seven years later, it is blatantly clear to me. I want to be an intentional woman. I do not want to feel as though I am a victim to my own life, rather that I am choosing to walk in God’s will for my life.
I have realized that this does not just happen, it takes intentionality. I want to put thought and care into all areas of my life. I feel a bit like I am coming out of a season of sleep deprivation and survival-mode in parenting, and into more structure. With structure and schedules, I am able to put much more thought into the things I do. I believe 2019 will be a big growing year for me in this way, and I look forward to all it brings. Here are 5 of the ways I hope to grow in intentionality over the next year.
1. Christian
I want to grow in my faith intentionally. I want to truly be a person who will pray wholeheartedly when somebody asks for prayer. It is embarrassing to admit, but in the past, I have told people I would pray for them and then go on with my day and forget. I do not want to be that person anymore, I want to grow to intentionally find time and space to pray for anyone and everyone who needs prayer, beyond my own personal prayers for my life and family.
2. Wife
I truly desire to become a more intentional wife for my husband. Whether that means packing lunches more often, praying for him more, or giving more time and consideration into gifts, I want my husband to know he is valued so deeply that I go above and beyond to bless him and bring peace into our relationship.
3. Mother
I do not want to be in survival-mode with my children. I want them to experience rich and abundant life in Christ here on earth. I want them to see that Christ means everything to me, and is the motivation behind any good thing I do for them. I do not want to be swept to and fro in my parenting, by my emotions or my desire for personal comfort. I want to practice authentic and intentional motherhood by praying, planning, and structuring the precious years I have with my littles underfoot.
4. Daughter / Sister
I have discovered deeply how much heart and soul my parents have put into raising me as their daughter. Having my own children has opened my eyes tremendously to the immense sacrifice and love my parents have always had for me and my siblings. There is no room for me to take my upbringing for granted, and I pray that the Lord helps me be grateful every single day for my wonderful family. If I could be half the parent to my daughters that my parents have been to me, I would feel accomplished in my calling. I also want to love my siblings better, specifically, I want to have meaningful conversations with them and not just superficial small talk. I want to be better at thinking ahead at their birthdays, anniversaries, etc. and show them that they are loved, not an afterthought or obligation.
5. Friend
Finally, I want to be more intentional with my friendships. I have seen friendship modeled incredibly well with my own church family and best friends, and I want to take on those Christlike qualities. I never want my friends to feel taken for granted or unappreciated, so I will work hard and pray that God uses me to become a better friend.
I am finding the woman I want to be.
What kind of woman do you want to be?
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