Originally published Wednesday, 26 September 2012.
Thanks so much for all your kind, kind comments on my post last week about the news that we're expecting a baby this coming winter! It is so encouraging to be on the receiving end of all that love. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Truth be told, it hasn't been super easy announcing the news to everyone that I'm pregnant.
That's not because I'm not excited; I certainly am! I have been looking forward to this time in my life for a long time now and it's something my husband and I have been actively praying about for more than a year.
No, it's because there's still a chance something could go wrong.
Even though we've passed the first trimester mark where people say it's "safe" to share the news because your chances of miscarriage are so low (less than 5%, now that we've heard the heartbeat twice), there's still that percentage of people who fall into that 5%. For them? Those statistics don't mean a thing. They still experience pain and hurt and disappointment at 100%, not just 5%.
The truth is that by telling people the good news, that means that if some bad news comes along, I'll have to share that, as well. Which is just heartbreaking to me.
Telling people adds vulnerability to the situation and feels, to me, like a leap of faith. A leap of faith because God has already brought us so far and we're announcing to the world that we trust him to carry us the rest of the way—no matter what happens next, whether we fall into that 5% or not.
And I truly believe that community is an essential part of this Christian faith we practice. We are called to open ourselves up to one another, for both the good times and the bad. We cannot live our lives of faith inside a safe bubble where we only show off the perfection of our lives; no, we have to draw others in even to the bad and the unknown and the messy and the ugly.
So even though in my heart, where I want the world to be a place of safety and comfort, I'd prefer to wait until the baby is born and announce, "Surprise! Look what we did over the weekend!," that's not the way God has called me to live.
God has called me to peel open my life and share it with my community (with you) before it's all smoothed over and polished and fine-tuned. I have to invite you into my life in its midst because it's in that place--that messy, anything-could-happen place—that we see miracles happen and God's grace and mercy shine down like the night sky ablaze with shooting stars.
And so I take that risk sharing it all with you and with everyone else who's journeying alongside me in this because I know God can be trusted. No matter what happens next.
Carmen writes the blog, Life Blessons, which provides an intimate look into her life as a twentysomething woman as she details her experiences learning how to live out her faith, enjoy the simple things in life and be the woman God created to her to be. Along the way, she shares the blessings and lessons that are a part of this journey, the things she likes to call her "blessons."
Feel free to learn more at her blog, Life Blessons.
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