Originally published Monday, 12 December 2016.
www.insideoutwithcourtnaye.org
As I searched online for information on women in ministry, I found it pretty challenging to find something that was all encompassing. What I mean by this is that I couldn’t find much on how to balance it all out with the many hats that we wear. So I pray that this post will be a blessing to many women who read it. With that being said, let’s see how to balance everything that we’re called to do as we become the women in ministry that God predestined from the beginning of time.
For starters, I am going to target some areas that will hopefully shed some light on how to juggle and maintain a healthy balanced life in ministry and home. Personally, I’ve been active in ministry for approximately 13 years or so now, and it has been an amazing ride! But along the way, there have definitely been some challenges (especially as God opens the door for new tasks). Some of you can probably relate to what I’m saying. Nonetheless, as the day draws closer for Christ’s return, as women, we have a job to do both at home, in the local church, and in the field. Hello to my Proverbs 31 women!
I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but today there are more Christian women writing books and blogs, becoming pastor’s wives, speakers, singers, dancers, actresses, entrepreneurs, being voices in the community for Christ, and finding their place in the local church. You may be one of them. Amen! BUT…we NEED balance!
We also need personal discipline. Let me start with having a proper balance of your personal time with the Lord. This cannot be neglected. I’ve read and heard a lot lately, that more and more ministers of the gospel are so busy preparing messages and programs, then spending time in God’s Word for themselves. Not good! This not only goes for us as ministers, but for anyone engaging in the work of the Lord. Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things will be added unto you.” Spending quality time with God on the inside is so vital to what we do on the outside. If you and I are not spending time hiding His Word in our hearts or basking in His presence behind closed doors, then how can we expect the light of God’s glory to show up when we share the gospel with others outside? We MUST make it personal before we make it public…or eventually the lack of time spent in His Word and presence will show up in our character and ministry.
Next, I want to talk to you about balance in marriage as a woman in ministry. If you’re not married, grab the tips anyway and share it with someone who is married. This is another area that we cannot neglect as wives in ministry. Even though we may have 101 things on our to-do-list, under God, our husbands are #2. And trust me, they need to know it by our actions. Men want respect and most of them desire intimacy on a regular basis (I’m trying to be discreet here). If you’re having a problem in this area, check out these next two Scriptures in Ephesians 5:33 and 1 Corinthians 7:4 & 5 which says, “Each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” And Paul encourages, “The wife gives authority over her body to her husband…so do not deprive each other of sexual relations.” (NLT)
So ladies, we have a responsibility to make sure that our husbands are respected and taken care of intimately…even if we’ve got a lot on our plates. This also helps to keep down extramarital affairs and keeps the enemy at bay! Also, here are a few extra tips as it relates to managing the home-life with the hubby. Preparing his food and having it ready for him after a long day’s work (personally, I like to feed my king before I feed my children). This shows my respect for him. Another tip is preparing meals before you leave for a long trip, speaking engagement, or ministry opportunity. This shows that you care and that you’re balanced. Let me add that respect goes beyond food. It’s a heart matter and a mindset. The term respect actually means holding someone in high esteem. Practically it means talking to him right (especially in front of others so you don’t shame the word of the Lord), humbling yourself instead of giving him a piece of your mind, ironing his clothes, supporting him in ministry or business, creating a calm and peaceful environment when he comes home, and planning a dinner or trip for just the two of you (romance). The key here is balance. And this makes a happy hubby!
If you have children, they’re next on balance as a woman in ministry. They are indeed a gift from God, and if they are, then you need to treat them as such. Amen! Make sure that you take a love break for your kid or kids. We can’t be too busy for them. Remember…balance. We’re called to love our children (Titus 2:4). Those years fly by and before we know it, they’ll be all grown up (if Jesus tarries). I like to have fun, so sometimes I’ll take my kids out for a day out on the town, a nice drive to a fun place, or to the mall to do a little shopping. I even have special bonding times with my nine year old daughter (we’ll go and have dinner or spend the day out together). Sometimes I’ll climb in bed with my kiddos and just talk to them and end it with prayer. Other times we’d just relax and watch a good movie. In our house, we serve the Lord, AND we also have our family time on Friday evenings. That’s a blessing from God that I cannot afford to neglect, and you shouldn’t either. Ask God to show you how to do it in your home.
Now this leads me to balance in the home as a woman in ministry. How many of us can get sooooo busy that we can tend to neglect the housework? Not good! God sees that. This is a reflection of who we are. How can we teach others to be keepers at home, if we’re not? It starts with us. I’ll never forget when Joyce Meyer said in one of her TV programs, “I hear people who want to have these big ministries, but they don’t even know how to make up their beds in the morning or keep dirty dishes out of the sink.” (I’m paraphrasing) Whoa! That hit me like a ton of bricks several years ago. I took heed, because that was a life-changing nugget for me! With that being said, we have to make sure that cleaning our homes, washing clothes, cooking dinner, and making sure our houses take a priority on our to-do-lists. You never know when you’ll have an unexpected guest pop over, woman of God.
As I close this post, I want to end it with balance with your body. If you do not have a healthy exercise routine and eating plan, I encourage you to look into it. You have to endure this race. Ministry takes a lot of work and stamina. Eating right and exercising will help you stay fit for the calling on your life. Yes, it’s hard work (trust me, I do boot camp every week) and it takes carving time out of your already busy schedule, but you need it to maintain a healthy lifestyle and endurance. And find a good multi-vitamin! And please don't forget to pencil in some recreational time for yourself. Plan your schedule for the week, but make sure that you find time to take a load off. Whether that's sitting down and reading a good book, watching a good movie, taking a hot bubble bath, scheduling a massage, or treating yourself to lunch and shopping alone....do it! That's balance. I pray that this post has helped you to some capacity. Just always keep in mind, that as women in ministry, we must maintain a healthy balance in every area of our lives. This brings a sweet peace that surpasses all understanding and this pleases the heart of God!
Remember, Jesus is coming back soon! And those who endure unto the end shall be saved. So let’s be ready from the Inside Out!
~Courtnaye
QUESTION: Where do you struggle the most as you are trying to flow in ministry? If you need prayer, you can email your request @ insideoutwithcourtnaye@gmail.com.
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