How to Handle Disappointments

Originally published Friday, 06 March 2015.

       www.insideoutwithcourtnaye.org

If you’ve clicked onto this post, then evidently you want to know how to handle or overcome disappointments. And I totally understand! Because I’ve had my share. For starters, when disappointment strikes, it usually feels like an immediate let down. You may even get a weak feeling in your stomach, or want to cry, or want to go into a mini state of depression. The dictionary actually describes it as a feeling of sadness or displeasure caused by the defeat of one’s hope or expectations. I would say that’s a pretty good definition of it. But let’s really talk about how to handle disappointments when they enter our lives.

I will tell you, that they can come in all forms such as…someone told you that he or she would do something for you and it didn’t happen. Or you wanted that job or promotion and it was given to someone else. It could be that you wanted to go somewhere and the plans failed. Or maybe you thought God was calling or telling you to do something and it just didn’t work out that way at all. However it happened, was a disappointment.

And whether you’re disappointed right now or you know the feeling and just want to know how to deal with it when it strikes again, I can only hope and pray that this will help shed some light on your situation and help you to quickly overcome whatever the disappointment is or may be. Personally, I believe that’s the key. Because when we’re disappointment, we have to make a conscious choice to quickly realize that that’s where we are, and then shake it off and don’t let it steal your joy! Because again, you don’t want to go into that mini-state of depression that I talked about earlier.  

So….when disappointments come, know that it’s okay to be sad or cry a little. God knows exactly where you are. But here’s a gentle reminder that God wants to share with you today and hold onto, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.” (Isaiah 55:8) Let that sink in for a moment. Because it’s so true. His thoughts and ways are far higher than ours and ultimately, He knows what’s best.

He will never do anything wrong by you. A temporary disappointment today, will eventually turn into a blessing later. It may be that whatever you wanted could’ve hurt you or set you back. It could be that God wants to give you His best instead of you settling for less. Or it could be because it’s just not time.  Whatever it is, know that He’s going to work it out for your good, because you love Him and because you are called according to His purpose as Romans 8:28 encourages.  

I can recall a situation when I was very disappointed with the outcome of an event. I mean, I prayed to God about everything…the plan, all the finite details, the people, you name it. BUT…the outcome was devastating! And I asked the Lord, what happened? I felt like I’d crossed all the T’s and dotted all the i’s, but it didn’t happen the way I thought it would. Well, that’s when He reminded me of the Scripture that I’d been feasting on for previous weeks. It was Isaiah 55:8, “My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways…” My heart sank. But I knew it was right.

At that moment, after I realized what God was saying to me, I did cry…but I bounced back with, “Thank you, Lord.” You see, it’s important to know that when disappointments come, we need to find a way to say, “Thank you, Lord.” The Bible tells us in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” We may not always understand it all, but we have to be able to trust that our Father knows best.

For me, this experience actually taught me to trust Him more. It taught me to just sit back and let Him drive the car of my life. It’s not easy being a passenger, but at least this way, I know that He’ll get me to my destination safely. Remember what Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans for a hope and a future.” (NIV) And Proverbs 16:9, “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” (NLT)

The truth is, we are not in control and we can’t make things or plans happen. It’s HIS plan, not our own, and He determines the overall outcome. What I’m learning, is that a lot of times, disappointments happen when we take the wheel or when we imagine things to happen a certain way in our lives. And when they don’t go as we planned it or thought or even prayed it, then it feels like a total let down. Trust me. I would know. But it’s important to remember that God is still there and He’s working it all out for the best!

So when disappointments come, you have to immediately recognize what has just occurred and talk to God about it. No doubt, some of them are beyond our control completely, but that’s when “trust” has to kick in. And again, it’s okay to cry if you have to, but then hold onto God’s Word to you, “My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways. You can make your plans, but I will determine your steps. I know the plans that I have for you, plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans for a hope and a future. I’m working it out for your good. Give thanks and trust me. Lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways, acknowledge me and I will direct your path.”

Hold onto God’s unchanging Word. He’s for you, not against you. This is how you handle disappointments.

     “…Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”

Psalm 30:5

Remember, Jesus is coming back soon! And those who endure unto the end shall be saved. So let’s be ready from the Inside Out!

~Courtnaye     

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