Friend, today, I want to encourage you to do the things that scare you most. Embrace your weaknesses as strengths because when you are the weakest, His power can be seen through you.
On March 2nd, 2023, I had the honor and opportunity to speak at Ohio Christian University's Thursday Chapel. As a 2019 graduate, I felt honored to speak and present students with a challenge: Navigating Mental Health as a Christian.
Leading up to this speech, I felt bold. I was excited, and after preparing my main points, I practiced them day after day. Once I reached a comfortable level of memorization and ad-lib, I knew I was ready. This was what God was calling me to do as an author, and I needed to obey the call.
But the morning of Thursday, March 2nd, I woke up sick to my stomach. With knots rising to the surface, I was anxious. And by the time I made it to Ohio Christian University, my knees were knocking.
Between prepping for the service and meeting the team I would be working with, I had a lot on my mind. I'm sure everyone could tell I felt like throwing up and passing out simultaneously: pale skin, shaking hands, and legs that bobbed up and down like apples in the water.
But it was as if the Assistant Chapel leader knew my fears. And as she prayed and anointed me, I knew I had to do this. I had to trust that God would work through my weaknesses, even the weakness of feeling scared and anxious at that moment. My fiance squeezed my hand for affirmation.
Humble Beginnings
After the kindest introduction, I climbed the steps to the stage. I thought for sure you could see my shoulders shudder and my heart pounding out of my chest.
Studying college students, I took a deep breath. I surveyed their eyes with mine, and then the Holy Spirit took over.
Twenty-five minutes later, I knew that the fire of God had been within me. I couldn't remember how many things I ad-libbed or even if I said everything I originally planned to speak. But what I do know is that the moment I stepped off that stage, my anxiety skyrocketed.
As the closing song played, my hands shook like leaves on trees outside my window on the windiest of days. I tried to control them but couldn't breathe. In fact, I couldn't physically feel anything. I was numb. But as a smile made its way over my face, I knew that God was speaking something sweet over me. Not a soul knew I was nervous. And when I watched the recording back to myself, I was shocked.
I was cool and composed.
Not an ounce of fear was seen on my face.
Nobody knew I was petrified besides my fiance, my mom, my God, and me.
Later that evening, I wept at the meditation that prodded my heart:
"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me" (2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV).
Or as the Passion Translation notes, "But he answered me, “My grace is always more than enough for you, and my power finds its full expression through your weakness.” So I will celebrate my weaknesses, for when I’m weak I sense more deeply the mighty power of Christ living in me" (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Are you Weak or Strong?
Earlier that day, I spoke on that exact verse. I explained that just because we are Christians, God doesn't always take our pain away. And just as Paul pleaded for his thorn in the flesh to be ripped from his side, I'd begged God to take away my pain. My anxiety. My fears. My chronic illnesses and trauma. And yet, I still suffer. I still believe, but that doesn't mean I will live a life free from all suffering.
And at that moment, as my knees hit the floor, I wept. I wept because I knew this:
I had been obedient.
I did what He called me to do.
And there was power in being weak.
There still is.
Friend, today, I want to encourage you to do the things that scare you most. Embrace your weaknesses as strengths because when you are the weakest, His power can be seen through you.
It's time that we shout our weaknesses from the rooftops. Not in doubt or disbelief, but because there is no reason for us to be ashamed. His power is illustrated best when we're weak and have to rely on Him. And ultimately, it's okay to be weak. We were never meant to think we had such strength on our own.
"So I’m not defeated by my weakness, but delighted! For when I feel my weakness and endure mistreatment—when I’m surrounded with troubles on every side and face persecution because of my love for Christ—I am made yet stronger. For my weakness becomes a portal to God’s power" (2 Corinthians 12:10, TPT).
It's Okay to be Weak
Sweet souls, it is okay to be weak.
It's okay to be broken.
How else would the light get through?
How else would we become so dependent on Him for strength?
I used to think that loss and pain were weaknesses. Measures of my character. It's taken me almost two decades to realize quite the opposite is true.
Without my pain, would I know healing?
Without my need, would I recognize my need for Him?
Without my brokenness, would I pray for His strength?
His power is perfect in my weakness.
It's always been about Him, though we often shift our focus to ourselves.
So in our weaknesses, let's work on shifting these things back to Him.
Our burdens.
Our insecurities.
Everything that makes us weak.
And let me boast in my weakness, for when I'm weak, He is strong.
His grace is sufficient.
It's all I need.
It is more than enough.
Let the God of strength be your power and more than enough today. Not just on the days you're public speaking and terrified like me, but on the days you're weary, weak, and wounded.
Rest in His grace. Rest in His strength and not on your own. It's not a sin to be weak, but He did ask you to trust in Him. To walk justly with Him. To rely on Him.
"I have to brag. There is nothing to be gained by it, but I must brag about the visions and other things that the Lord has shown me. I know about one of Christ's followers who was taken up into the third heaven 14 years ago. I don't know if the man was still in his body when it happened, but God certainly knows. As I said, only God really knows if this man was in his body at the time. But he was taken up into paradise, where he heard things too wonderful to tell. I will brag about that man, but not about myself, except to say how weak I am. Yet even if I did brag, I would not be foolish. I would simply be speaking the truth. But I will try not to say too much. That way, none of you will think more highly of me than you should because of what you have seen me do and say. Of course, I am now referring to the wonderful things I saw. One of Satan's angels was sent to make me suffer terribly, so that I would not feel too proud. Three times I begged the Lord to make this suffering go away. But he replied, “My gift of undeserved grace is all you need. My power is strongest when you are weak.” So if Christ keeps giving me his power, I will gladly brag about how weak I am. Yes, I am glad to be weak or insulted or mistreated or to have troubles and sufferings, if it is for Christ. Because when I am weak, I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:1-10, CEV).
Agape, Amber
See the speech here: https://youtu.be/
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/SIphotography
