I wanted to share a few messages that have been on my heart since I got married.
It's crazy to look back on my writing career and see the fingerprints of Jesus. When I struggled with my singleness--He gave me the opportunity to write about it. To voice my concerns.
I was single for a long time. Blah. Blah. Blah.
I've mentioned this many times. But that's why I can't help but want to encourage those of you who don't feel that you're worth pursuing--because you are! Seriously!
"If only I could reach out to my former self and tell her that one day very soon she will meet her prince" (Loves Me Not).
This Valentine's Day, please let me encourage you with 5 ways to feel pursued.
1. I used to believe the lie that because you are in a relationship every holiday should be perfect including Valentine’s Day. Don't just believe me, read what Katie, Jessica, Teryn, Bethany, Angela, Katy, Carol, and Amber had to say! ~ When Valentine's Day Hurts at iBelieve.com.
2. Breakups sting because our hearts were never meant to experience heartbreak. Watch the video I recorded here for ChristianMingle, then, read the rest of the article: Why Breakups Really Hurt.
3. Every relationship is worth learning from—even the bad ones. When I wrote Not Another Dating Book, I surveyed a lot of people on their most emabarrassing date stories. If you need a good laugh this Valentine's Day-Week, read below and then click on the article for the rest of the hilarious stories at ChristianMingoe ~ Most Embarrassing Date Stories.
I went over to my date’s house to pick her up for a dance. She got in the car and I proceeded to try to back out of the driveway with the emergency brake still on. Her parents, grandparents, and siblings were all standing there laughing. —Ethan, 20
My ex-girlfriend had just broken up with me, but couldn’t find a new date to her homecoming dance. Her mother called my mother, and my mom forced me to take her. It was awful. —Nathan, 28 My boyfriend took me for a picnic in the park after it had gotten dark, not realizing that it was illegal to be there after sunset. He’d just leaned over to kiss me when a policeman showed up and demanded to know what we were doing. —Emily, 21
I was set up on a blind date, and I was only told the guy’s first name. When he arrived, it turned out to be an ex-boyfriend. Our breakup hadn’t been a good one. He stormed off, and I sat there feeling awkward. —Kelly, 31
In the middle of dinner my date got up, said he was going to the bathroom, and left the table. He was gone for half an hour. I started to wonder if he’d ditched me, but his jacket was still on the chair and his phone was still in the pocket. He finally returned with some excuse about feeding the parking meter, acting like nothing was wrong. When the check finally came, he whipped out a two-for-one coupon. “I bet you’re glad I have this,” he said. “Otherwise I wouldn’t have taken you to a place this nice.”—Andrea, 23
I was on a date with a guy I met on eHarmony. It was really uncomfortable — we had nothing in common, and I had more chemistry with our waiter. As the date was ending he looked at me and said, “So how should we pursue this?” I told him I wasn't interested. —Chelsea, 26
I spent the entire date calling a guy by his twin brother's name. Worst date ever for him and me. —Bethany, 32
4. Nowhere does the Bible say, “Thou shall or shall not be friends with the opposite sex.” When it comes to relationships, guarding your heart isn’t enough. Why? Regardless if you’re single, married, divorced, or separated -- the heart is only one fourth of God’s greatest commandment.
Mark 12:30-31 says, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”
Isn’t it interesting that we as people emphasize the heart more than the soul, mind, and strength Read the rest of my article for ChristianMingle here: Guarding Your Heart Isn't Enough.
5. Jesus Loves You. This shouldn't come as a surprise. Even though it's listed 5th does not make it last or certainly least. Unfortunately, when you've been single for a long time like I was, you start to ache for human love. It's understandable. As much as you hear it from God and your close family and friends--it's almost like it's not enough. Jesus' love is enough, but if we're honest--sometimes it just doesn't feel that way.
But. He (Jesus) loves you. Yeah you. If there’s one thing you remember from this post it’s that: You. Are. Loved. The most encouraging (and challenging words) came from my friend Darlene many years ago. When I told her how grateful I was that she wrote these words down, she told me that she doesn't remember writing them to me and was so glad God used her to speak to me. I just love it when that happens. So, hopefully these words can ring true for someone else (not just me)!
Did you know your actions speak your heart? If your heart is not fully with God, the lover of your soul, then something’s missing. God desperately wants you all to Himself. Keep your faith in God and that He will bring you the desires of your heart. Stand strong and do not look to the opposite sex. Do not be hindered by your flesh, for your flesh wants pleasure now. But now is not the time. Not yet. Do not be frustrated; the day is coming. Do not be angry. When the day comes, you will be pleased beyond comprehension.
Wait for your future spouse and do not anxiously search for him or her.
When the time is ripe, you will know because God will show you. When you give this to God, He will give you peace, and when attacks of the flesh come, flee for the peace God has, which comes when you trust in Him and wait for the right timing. The time, when it comes, will be amazing, so please wait for this wonderful gift. Jesus loves you.”
Happy Valentine's everyone! Remember that you're worth pursuing!
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Ridofranz
