When we choose to use failure as an invitation for intimacy with God, we may find failure wasn't as bad as we thought.
Signing my first contract with a traditional publisher, I was extremely excited. This publisher was known for big books with significant sales. When the book was released, I assumed my book would sell just as well, if not better, than most children's books out there. However, to my surprise, three months later, when I opened my quarterly report and discovered that it did not sell well at all, one thought came to my mind:
I'm a failure.
Although God used it to bless me tremendously as the book powerfully communicated the gospel, I was basing my approval on sales numbers rather than God's obedience to what he wanted me to do. Whenever someone asked me how well my book was selling, I would get defensive and not tell them the number.
People made me feel like my book had no value simply because it had not sold well. Furthermore, it made me feel like I didn’t have value as a person or writer because my book didn’t sell many copies. Although this is a common occurrence throughout publishing history, because we emphasize numbers, it is easy to get confused and think that life is all about money, profit, and numbers rather than obedience, spiritual growth, and depth of maturity. God often uses failure in our lives to develop maturity and character. God reminded me I’m worth more than a sales report.
Although society looks down on failure and allows people to feel as though their worth and value are based more on performance than on the presence of God, failure is often confused with a bad thing. Still, it can be a reasonable and, in some cases, good thing.
Here is how I learned failure is not an indication that God is done with me:
Failure Is an Opportunity for New Things
So often, we lead with our hearts regarding where our life will go. We desire things like homes, families, promising careers, good health, etcetera. While these are not bad things in and of themselves, sometimes God chooses not to give us those things. When one area of life we've planned has failed, we often think our life is a failure or not worth living simply because we have not achieved what we want.
However, failure is an opportunity for new things. It's something that allows us to look to other places for direction. When we feel one thing, it's simply God's reminder that he is in control and that we are never a failure in his eyes. If we obey what God wants us to do, we will always be a success.
Failure Is Directional, Not Terminal
Failure often redirects us to things we might never have imagined. For example, when we go in one career direction only to find that our position is terminated or we are no longer in that line of work, we may panic and think our lives are finished. But this does not mean our lives are over or God will not use us in different areas.
Failure is never terminal. It simply redirects us to new and exciting paths God has for us. Our good God never wants us to be done until our time on earth is done. Until then, our lives may take many pivots and redirections as we seek to discover God's will for our lives and use him in new and exciting ways.
Failure Refines Our Character
Failure often refines our character amid trials. I have heard that people's true character emerges when they don't get what they want. I have seen this many times throughout my life. People who are friendly in one way often show their true colors when they don't get something they are looking for.
Failure allows us to see life from a new perspective. It will enable us to take responsibility for places where sinful behaviors may have prevented us from achieving the goal. But it also helps us see and refine the fruits of the spirit as we seek to deal with people in conflict, resolve things in unity, and achieve reconciliation.
Failure Invites Intimacy
Failure often allows us to get in tune with the Holy Spirit. We can easily neglect our time with God when things are going well. We must read the Word, pray, or spend time with him. However, when we are lost and feel like failures, we want reassurance from our Heavenly Father that we are still worthy. God is faithful, and his promises are always good. They allow us to be comforted in our time of need. However, he also invites us to new and exciting things that failure has allowed us to pursue.
The next time you feel like a failure, go to God. Don't go to your friends and gossip about the situation. Don't drown your sorrows in an addiction like binge-watching TV or eating sugary foods. Instead, go to God and pour out your feelings. These are opportunities where God wants to be intimate with us in our pain and loss. When we choose to use failure as an invitation for intimacy with God, we may find failure wasn't as bad as we thought.
Failure Reminds Us of Our Humanity
By society’s standards, Jesus was a failure in picking friends since only two were at his crucifixion and so many of them abandoned him when they felt fear of persecution or rejection. If Jesus can deal with failure, so can we.
Even when we feel life is going our way, something can strike without notice and leave us wondering if we can go on. But these are the moments when we are reminded that God is vital in our weakness. In our humanity, God, who sees a bigger picture than all of us and whose ways are higher than ours, can see things and help us direct our paths if we only listen to him.
During your quiet time, remind yourself that you are human. Go to God and ask him to direct your path if you don't know where you're going—or if you do know where you're going. God is always faithful in leading and guiding us if we ask. He doesn't want to see us lost and astray, but he wants to see us going in the right direction. God is our faithful shepherd (Psalm 23). He is steadfast in guiding and directing us to the path where he wants us.
Failure is never easy. Failure can be the worst thing sometimes. No one wants to go through failure. However, failure has its pros, as it helps us see God for who he is, invites us into an opportunity for intimacy, reminds us of our humanity, refines our character, and directs us towards new and exciting paths. When we look at failure from this perspective, failure is not as bad as it seems but is an opportunity for us to grow stronger in our faith.
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