Being angry does not mean someone should refrain from prayer until such a time as they feel they can approach the throne of God. He wants His people to go to Him in all things, especially if going to Him will prevent a person from sinning. Instead, the Word says, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil” (Ephesians 4:26-27).
While people struggle with it in many different ways, everyone knows what it means to be angry and to have a hard time responding appropriately. It can come on suddenly, or burn over time. It can go away and then return in a flash, or simmer under the surface while someone carries it with them at all times. Sometimes people are angry for righteous reasons, but exercise that anger inappropriately.
No matter how or why it manifests, anger is a dangerous emotion that can lead people to make serious mistakes, or sin grievously and repeatedly. One of the best ways to handle anger is to go to God for help and pray through it. While it can take time for the Holy Spirit to work in someone’s heart and help them cope, God is there, hoping to replace anger with peace and forgiveness.
What Does the Bible Say about Anger?
Anger is a powerful emotion. It is usually a hostile feeling that is often driven by another emotion. It can be a reaction to being hurt, to being made to feel shame or embarrassment, to seeing something wrong, or to sadness. When the underlying feeling manifests through aggression, harshness, and wrath, that person is reacting in their anger. Because it is usually a response, anger wreaks havoc, adding to an already existing problem, and it does not bear healthy spiritual fruit. Instead, the Bible is clear that anger is unhealthy, ungodly, and when it goes unchecked creates a path of destruction.
In his epistles, James, the half-brother of Jesus warns, “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls” (James 1:19-21).
Anger is a worldly response, but God wants those who love Him to be patient, humble, and kind, even when it is difficult.
Some verses that address anger say:
Psalm 37:8 “Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.”
Proverbs 15:1 “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Proverbs 15:18: “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.”
Proverbs 29:11 “A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.”
Proverbs 29:22 “A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression.”
Ecclesiastes 7:9 “Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools.”
Matthew 5:22 “But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”
Colossians 3:8 “But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.”
Galatians 5:19-21 “Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
Can We Pray When We Are Angry?
It can be difficult to go to God in prayer when filled with anger. Going to God in prayer means conceding that in the flesh, a person cannot do the right thing. It means having to forgive or let something go. When someone is angry, they often feel they cannot express themselves eloquently or righteously.
Being angry does not mean someone should refrain from prayer until such a time as they feel they can approach the throne of God. He wants His people to go to Him in all things, especially if going to Him will prevent a person from sinning. Instead, the Word says, “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil” (Ephesians 4:26-27).
Going to the Lord and asking Him to help reduce or control anger, and asking for forgiveness for it, is better than acting in anger. Not only does God want to help those who love Him through difficult situations, trials, and temptations, but through their own sinful inclinations, so they can overcome them rather than give into them.
How to Pray When We Are Angry with God
When life is difficult, it can be easy to turn human fury at God. If He is all-loving, why do bad things happen? If He is all-knowing, why doesn’t He stop evil from acting in the world? How can God allow so much suffering?
In the Bible, there are several people who cry out to the Lord questioning Him. Habakkuk cried out, “O Lord, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear? Or cry to you ‘Violence!’ and you will not save?” (Habakkuk 1:2). David wrote in the Psalms, “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” (Psalm 13:1). When praying to the Lord in anger, it is okay to be honest, but both men also submitted to God’s sovereignty, and relied on His steadfast love.
Holy Father,
Right now, I am angry. I do not understand why I am suffering, why You are allowing this evil to reign in my life. My enemies surround me. Satan is assaulting me on all sides. I need Your help. Lord, please hear Your servant’s cries! Redeem this evil that reigns in my life. Lord, please help me to feel Your Holy Spirit, and remind me of the power of Your love. I know in my head that You love me, and that You work all things out for my good and Your glory, but I am having a hard time seeing and feeling that during this situation. Lord, I know You are good. I know You love me. Take away my anger and help me to find peace and comfort in You.
In the Name of Jesus,
Amen.
How to Pray When We Are Angry with Ourselves
Sometimes people know they made a mistake, and they become angry with themselves, and struggle to forgive themselves and move past it. Other individuals struggle with an unhealthy level of anger, the source of which they cannot place, and they turn in on themselves.
It can be embarrassing to go to God and admit that someone is angry with themselves, either because it is hard to say why they are angry, or because it means admitting to sin. There is a blueprint in the Bible for praying when someone is angry with themselves. David committed adultery with Bathsheba, and then murdered her husband to cover up His sin. In Psalm 51 he writes:
“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight so that you may be justified in your word and blameless in your judgment” (Psalm 51:1-4).
How to Pray When We Are Angry with Others (or Situations)
When people do wrong, one of the hardest things to do is forgive. The natural inclination of man is to hate, to lash out, and to exert justice in their own power. The Bible warns against this kind of anger, “ Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord’” (Romans 12:19). Instead, Christians should pursue forgiveness, extending the grace that God gave them to others.
When Christians need help forgiving someone else, or accepting a difficult situation, the Bible is clear about the attitude or mentality they should have; “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-3). Going to the Lord in humility, asking for patience and gentleness and the power to forgive is an important part of the Christian life.
In this life, there will be challenges that incite anger, and it can be difficult to overcome. Accepting that God is in control and being willing to submit to His will are important first steps to praying through anger. Through prayer, the Spirit will send God’s peace, and help anyone who asks for help to overcome their wrath, and become more like Him in character.
Sources
Gillaspie, D.E. Anger, A Biblical Perspective. Bloomington: Westbow Press, 2011.
Jones, Robert. Uprooting Anger Biblical Help for a Common Problem. Phillipsburg: P&R Publishing, 2005.
Kim, Em. Biblical Anger Management. Bloomington: Booktango, 2011.
Related articles
Is Anger Always a Sin?
5 Times Jesus Got Angry
Why it Matters So Much That God Is "Slow to Anger"
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Bethany Verrett is a freelance writer who uses her passion for God, reading, and writing to glorify God. She and her husband have lived all over the country serving their Lord and Savior in ministry. She has a blog on graceandgrowing.com.
