A memoir.
I was 15 when my parents decided to uproot our life in San Diego and move to small-town Missouri. At an age when most kids are just figuring out who they are and where they belong, I was starting over. During my last youth group meeting before setting out across the country, one of the leaders handed me a folded-up piece of paper. It was a letter of encouragement. I don’t remember anything that was written in that letter except the verse, Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (NIV).
It was exactly what my aching heart needed at that moment, as I soaked in the realm of the unknowns that were up ahead. The only thing my teenage self could comprehend was that I was leaving behind my homeland, my friends, the only life I knew. Even my older brother, sister, nephew, and niece were staying behind. I cautiously wondered if I would ever be happy again.
I truly felt like I could relate with the exiles that Jeremiah originally wrote this to. I prayed Jeremiah 29:10-14 daily, fully clinging to the promise that God would bring me back to California, to the place that I once knew.
“I will visit you, and I will fulfill my promise to you, and bring you back to this place.” Jeremiah 29:10
Today, in my 40s, I would tell that insecure girl to grab onto the adventure, sit back, and watch God work, because the promise in Jeremiah 29:11 is true! I would also tell her to get used to it. Life is like the tides of the ocean, with their ebb and flow, constantly coming and going, shifting, never returning to the exact place that they once were.
I’ve discovered that it’s not a good idea to let yourself get too settled into a place, figuratively or literally, because God doesn’t tell us to stay put. He tells us to move, to go out into the world, to not stay stagnant, but always to grow and mature in Him.
Sometimes, in order to do this, God pushes us out of our comfort zone. Sometimes, He makes a 15-year-old girl move across the country so that she can see God is in Nixa, Missouri, just as much as He is in Fallbrook, California.
Sometimes, He allows really difficult situations to enter into our lives, and we have no choice but to lean on Him, or else drown in our sorrows, doubts, and fears because of our unwillingness to surrender and believe. The Book of Job is a testament to this.
And while this might be hard for some of us to grasp, the sweet promise of Jeremiah 29:11 gives me a hope to cling to and a future to look forward to. In the seasons of my life when my future seems uncertain and I have no clue what is up ahead, I can be assured that God, indeed, has a plan for my life.
When I was 15, my understanding of God was quite small, but I knew enough about God to know that he wouldn’t abandon me and that He had a perfect plan for me. I knew enough about Him that I knew I could trust Him with my future. Unlike my earthly father, who had disappointed me time and time again, I knew that God would never let me down.
Even before I had ever noticed, God had already been fulfilling the words declared in this verse over my life. Little did I know that God was saving me over and over again.
The words, “For I know the plans I have for you…. Plans to give you hope and a future,” echoed throughout my whole life. As I look back, I see all the times that God was standing next to me. He always kept His promise to me and because of that, I can say with conviction that He will always keep His promise, not just to me, but to you as well.
The truth is, He rescued me when I barely knew Him. And because of this divine thread woven throughout all the seasons of my life, the things I saw and experienced in my home as a little girl had no effect on my faith, other than to make my faith stronger.
Some of my earliest memories of my father were that of a raging, angry drunk. One specific memory has stuck with me my entire life. Perhaps it is meant to serve as a reminder of where I came from and how far God has not only taken me but also how much He has shielded me from the evils of this world.
When I was a little girl, it was a common occurrence for my dad to come home drunk. Inevitably, this always caused my parents to fight. To make matters worse, my dad was a violent, belligerent drunk, and my mom was intolerant of his behavior.
One evening, when tensions really started to rise, and it was apparent that my dad wasn’t going to settle down, my mom told my brother and me to go tell the neighbors to call the police. My dad begged us not to, and although we were torn, we listened to my mom.
From the corner of my neighbor’s yard, I stood on my tippy toes, trying to see over the fence, my stringy blonde hair stuck to my dirty face. Moments later, I saw my dad taken away in the police car, and my mom being wheeled out on a stretcher and hoisted into an ambulance.
For several years, this was our normal. The ups and downs of my parents' rocky relationship and my dad's addictions just kind of blend together. Even though I only remember little snippets from those younger years, looking back, I can see how God shielded me from harm and carved out a path for me. What the enemy had intended for evil God turned into something good (Genesis 50:20).
I lived in Missouri for two years, just long enough to make new friends, to find my place, and to accept my new life. That’s when my parents decided to move back to San Diego. I was four months away from graduating high school and was in a serious relationship with the guy I thought I was going to marry. At an age when you’re just getting ready to plan for your future, my future was uncertain.
Even though my trust in my parents’ ability to give me hope for a future started to wane, my faith in God’s plan for my life continued to grow. Again, the words of Jeremiah 29:11 pulsed through my veins. Still too young to stay put, I had to go with them—again. I chose to trust that God knew what the plan was, even if I did not.
Although I encountered various trials and setbacks in my young adult years, many times uncertain of my future, God showed up at all the right times and in all the places where I needed Him. Shortly after graduating college, I met the man I would marry. Twenty-two years later, we are both eye-witnesses to the way God calls His children to Him, and how He not only promises a hope and a future, but He also fulfills His promises to us.
As I have become more intimate with God through years of quiet time, devotion, and worship, actively surrendering my life to Him, I’ve come to realize that Jeremiah 29:11 is not just a promise but also a description of God’s character:
"I know…" - God is the omnipotent, all-knowing God. Nothing surprises Him. He knows what’s up ahead. He knows my future. This truth comforts me because it tells me that God already knows and anticipates everything that happens.
"… the plans I have for you…" - Even though we have a free will to do what we want to do, when we follow God, we can be assured that He has a plan for our life that is exceedingly better than anything we could do on our own (Ephesians 3:20). In addition, His actions are not defined by ours. Nothing I ever do will stop His plan for my life.
"…declares the Lord…" - A declaration is a promise. God promises that He knows the plans that He has for my life! If He says it, He’s going to do it.
These truths have given me the strength and endurance to push through the hardest moments of my life. In the same way that I learned to pray Jeremiah 29:11 over my own life, I have learned to pray it over my children, placing their lives and future in His hands.
Just as Jeremiah 29:11 was true for the exiled people of Israel, it has rang true for me; I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that it is true for my husband and my children and, also, for you! The same God that kept His promises to me is the same God who will keep His promises to you.
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/kieferpix
Jennifer Jabbour resides in the scenic San Diego countryside with her husband, adult son, and teen daughter, and their hilarious English Bulldog. Jennifer has a B.A. in Integrated Business Communications, and is a Go + Tell Gals licensed life coach. Jennifer hopes to use her calling of writing, coaching, and speaking to equip and empower women to clarify their vision and to boldly step forward in response to God's calling on their life, as well as educate and encourage others to experience the abundance of God's goodness when they seek Him first in all that they do. Jennifer is also a brown belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, a photographer, and an avid outdoors-woman. She loves camping, hiking, running, and playing the piano in her free time.
You can keep up with Jennifer on her website https://www.jenniferjabbour.com.