A Biblical Response to Conflict - Encouragement Café - Mar. 25, 2015

A Biblical Response to Conflict

Café Menu for Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Today’s Special is: Finding a Peaceable Agreement When Conflict Arises

Carefully prepared just for you by your friend, Michelle S. Lazurek

Main Ingredient:

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Romans 12:18 NIV

Entrée:

During a routine ministry meeting, I expressed my opinion on a particular topic relevant to our meeting. “Whoa!” said one of the members. “I’m not sure I agree with that.”

This began a long discussion, with heated exchanges on both sides. At the end of the meeting, I felt awkward and nervous about the exchange, afraid that this would be the last time she’d come to a meeting. But you know what happened?

We walked away as friends. And she came back the following week.

When I spoke with her the following week, I wanted to make sure not only that she did not walk away angry at the altercation, but that we were ok as friends. Although I never changed my mind about my theological standpoint (nor did she), I cared enough about her enough to let her know that I still loved her even though we disagreed.

The apostle Paul and Barnabas disagreed with the crowds (Acts 15:1-2 NIV) and Jesus disagreed with Peter (Matthew 16:23 NIV). The more time we spend with someone, the more their weaknesses and thoughts are exposed. Conflict is inevitable.

But what do you do when the conflict is between you and a member of your ministry?

Here are three things you can do when conflict arises in your church or ministry:

Nip it in the bud –

If you perceive there is a problem, set aside time to meet with that person individually. Ask them what you can do to help you work through this issue.

Get a mediator –

If you can’t resolve the issue between the two of you, ask a third party to act as a mediator between you and the other person. Make sure you choose a person who can look at the situation without bias or judgment. Then agree to meet at a neutral location such as a coffee shop or restaurant. This helps maintain your objectivity.

Come to a peaceable agreement (if possible) –

Meet with people and face your issues directly. Doing this does not mean you will always come to a peaceable solution. Sometimes people are unwilling to take responsibility for their actions.

Take Out:

We all encounter conflict. As long as it stands with you, do everything within your power to make peace. Dealing with conflict in a biblical way not only helps your relationships, but makes you a better disciple too.

Dessert:

Lord, help us to deal directly and peaceably with people when conflict arises in our lives. Amen.

© 2015 by Michelle S. Lazurek. All rights reserved.

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