November 2, 2022
What if Our Pain Is the Stage for Miracles?
BECKY KEIFE
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“He replied, ‘What is impossible for people is possible with God.’” Luke 18:27 (NLT)
There was a time in my life when my parents couldn’t be in the same room with each other.
As a kid, I’d wait on the wicker love seat and stare impatiently out the big picture window. As soon as my dad’s black sedan pulled into the driveway, I’d race out the front door. Was I that excited to see my dad? Honestly, not really. I was just that eager to avoid a possible confrontation between him and my mom.
There were a thousand spoken and unspoken hurts between my parents that spilled over into my heart.
I never longed for them to get back together — I just wanted things to be different. I just wanted to escape the shrapnel of their pain.
Later, several verbal blowups, low blows, and family drama at my college graduation and wedding left me gutted. I wondered if it would always be like this.
I share this not as a catalog of grievances against my parents but to set the stage for the miracle I never expected.
Fast-forward several years to when my dad was in a really difficult place in his life. His second marriage had failed, as had his business and health. Thanksgiving was approaching. Holidays are always extra complicated for kids of divorce. My sisters and I were all married and had to juggle time with our in-laws and separate celebrations with Mom and Dad.
So you can imagine my surprise when, one day, my mom asked, “How would you feel if I invited your dad to join us for Thanksgiving?”
She went on to explain how she understood what a burden it was to navigate three family gatherings. She said she wasn’t sure if Dad would accept an invitation from her, but she felt like the Lord was asking her to extend it.
Honestly? My first thought was, No way! I pictured the awkwardness of being in the same house all together. I thought about how I would rather take the chaos of bouncing from one Thanksgiving meal to the next than the tension of sitting at the same table with both my parents. The family chasm caused by their divorce was way too wide to bridge with some mashed potatoes and gravy. Years of conflict and failed resolutions proved that reconciliation was impossible, right? So why even try?
Given our family history, this knee-jerk reaction was understandable — but it was also rooted in fear. I’m grateful to tell you that my initial response didn’t win out.
The first miracle was my mom inviting my dad to Thanksgiving dinner. The second miracle was the doorbell ringing and my dad showing up with a bottle of cider. The miracles after that were too many to count.
Jesus was clear when He said, “What is impossible for people is possible with God” (Luke 18:27). This is true for our salvation and our sanctification, for our eternal hope and our present healing.
As little ones threw corn kernels from highchairs, and unspoken words passed in sideways glances between sisters, we made it through that shared Thanksgiving — the first of many to come. Dad thanked Mom for inviting him and complimented her cooking. Mom thanked Dad for coming and gave him another piece of homemade pie to-go.
It was hard and uncomfortable and so very worth it. I left that dinner with a belly full of turkey and a heart full of praise. What I thought was surely impossible turned out not to be. From our pain, God produced a miracle — and I’m still giving thanks to this day.
God, thank You for working in my life at all times — even in situations and relationships that feel too broken to be healed. Help me to live surrendered to Your Spirit so that Your power and goodness might be on display in my life. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
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Becky Keife is the editor and a contributing writer for (in)courage’s new book, Come Sit with Me: How to Delight in Differences, Love through Disagreements, and Live with Discomfort. This book is a gentle guide to help you move closer to God and others through life’s tough moments.
ENGAGE
Becky is passionate about bringing struggles out of the darkness of isolation and into the light of shared experience. Follow her on Instagram or at beckykeife.com.
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FOR DEEPER STUDY
Romans 8:28, “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” (NLT)
What situation in your life feels impossible? How have you seen God work in surprising ways?
© 2022 by Becky Keife. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
P.O. Box 3189
Matthews, NC 28106
www.Proverbs31.org
Originally published Wednesday, 02 November 2022.