"Moses also said to Korah, “Now listen, you Levites! Isn’t it enough for you that the God of Israel has separated you from the rest of the Israelite community and brought you near himself to do the work at the Lord’s Tabernacle and to stand before the community and minister to them? He has brought you and all your fellow Levites near himself, but now you are trying to get the priesthood too. It is against the Lord that you and all your followers have banded together. Who is Aaron that you should grumble against him?". Numbers 16:8-11 (NIV)
My battle with jealousy started in middle school. While most girls competed with good looks or stylish outfits, I wanted to be known for my grades. I began chasing not only straight-A's but a 4.0 GPA.
This goal had some benefits and made me the driven person I am today, but it also significantly hindered who I believed I was. My identity was quickly found in what I could do or achieve instead of who God says I am. I wonder if you can relate.
By the time I was in high school, I realized that my identity didn't come from grades or popularity, but the one who created me. Nevertheless, I still struggled. Not only was I obsessed with being perfect, but I started to compare myself to others—especially other Christians. Instead of seeing these individuals as brothers and sisters in Christ, I saw them as competition.
If she was gifted in singing, I needed to be a better singer.
If he could run a mile in seven minutes, I needed to run one in six.
If she could do the splits and a grand jeté with ease, I would do one higher.
And yet, as hard as I worked and strived, my achievements left me feeling nothing but empty inside. Why? Because I wasn't just dissatisfied with myself. I was dissatisfied with the unique talents God had given me. I was essentially saying to the Lord, "Thanks for gifting me, but it's not enough. I need to be like her."
Comparison and jealousy aren't a new phenomenon. From Joseph's brothers to Cain with Abel, Saul with David, and Rachel and Leah, the list is expansive. And yet, as women, it often feels like we were born to see her win as our loss. But is that biblical? Absolutely not.
In Numbers 16, Korah had a bit of a jealousy bug himself. Recruiting his friends Dathan and Abiram to conspire with him, they not only rebelled against Moses and Aaron but complained that they were leading him: "They united against Moses and Aaron and said, 'You have gone too far! The whole community of Israel has been set apart by the Lord, and He is with all of us. What right do you have to act as though you are greater than the rest of the Lord's people?'" (Numbers 16:3, NLT).
By verses 8-11, one problem becomes clear: Korah is jealous of Moses and Aaron's positions. In other words, he believed his role as a Levite should be as great or greater than the role of Moses or Aaron. And I have to wonder, how many of us make decisions today with that same jealousy and comparison? We might not rebel against them, but our minds sure aren't happy with their success. Instead of cultivating the gifts God's given us, we find it easier to complain or put others down.
But friends, her win isn't your loss. She's not your enemy. God's given each of us gifts according to His will and plan for our lives, and those talents aren't wasted. He crafted you with specific skills and talents. Our job isn't to judge the talents of ourselves or others; our job is to use them to bring Him glory.
Romans 12:6-8 says it this way: "In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly" (Romans 12:6-8, NLT).
I've never found it a coincidence that Paul follows these verses up with true love and humility for others: "Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other" (Romans 12:9-10, NLT).
If you're struggling with jealousy today, please know you're not alone. Many people wrestle with comparison and have trouble seeing their true identity in Christ. Jealousy as a feeling isn't inherently bad. Rather, it alerts us to take a deeper look at the situation and see what's going on within ourselves. Jealousy as an action is where we have to watch out. If our actions are out of jealousy, we need to take a step back, reassess the situation, and ask the Lord to help us realign who we are and what we've been called to do.
God didn't create us with different gifts so that we could be jealous of one another. He created us with different gifts so that, together, we could be pieces of His complete picture called the Church. Just as our bodies have many parts, so, too, the Church is comprised of a variety of people, each with special gifts that are God-ordained.
Let's pray:
Dear Lord, You know how difficult it can be to fight jealousy. Instead of valuing the gifts you've given us, we find it easier to compare ourselves and tear others down. Jesus, this shouldn't be so. When we're struggling, please remind us to have gratitude for the gifts you've bestowed upon us. Let us use these gifts to glorify you and work in partnership with those who are gifted differently. Everything we have from you is a gift, Lord. And we're called to use those gifts to serve those around us while pointing them to your majestic, perfect, and holy name. In Jesus' Name, we pray, Amen.
Agape, Amber
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/CarlosDavid.org
Related Resource: Anxiety: Practical Steps for Healing in Christ
Anxiety is debilitating and can leave us feeling overwhelmed, alone, and defeated. But what if there were practical steps and biblical truths that could lessen the load and aid us in our freedom journeys with mental health struggles? Pastor and Licensed Professional Counselor Susan Thomas joins me to discuss this today! Like what you hear? Subscribe to Bought + Beloved with Kirby Kelly on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!
Originally published Wednesday, 26 March 2025.
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