At times, life can feel unfair. When we see other people’s successful lives, it makes us feel inadequate. Hard times cause us to feel like life is unfair and that things will never get better. If you feel like this, know that it's normal, but God doesn’t want you to allow these feelings to interfere with the life He has for you.
The Lord died for you to have an abundant life (John 10:10). He did not die for you to be discontent, comparing your life to others. And while life's hardships are unwarranted at times, this is not God’s fault. Things are messy because we live in a fallen world, which means we must know what to do when life feels unfair.
When life feels unfair, turn off social media. Social is one of the main things that causes us to feel as though our lives aren't “as good” as the people we follow. Whether it is our friends, families, or celebrities, it is easy to compare our lives to theirs. This is a dangerous business as it will always leave us feeling that our lives are “less than," creating easy access for bitterness to take root in our hearts.
When we click on social platforms, whether Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, or anything else, we are exposing ourselves to the highlight reels of people’s lives. It is not good to compare their highlight reel to our everyday lives. If you do, you will feel as though life is unfair when, in actuality, they are just not showing the negative side of their lives. Remember this when you are on social and feel life is unjust.
Even if you don't frequent social media, you are not immune to seeing life as biased toward everyone but you. You might look at your neighbors, your co-workers, or your friends and feel that your “lot in life” is not as good as theirs. Remember, though, if you keep comparing your life to theirs, you will never feel content. To truly help yourself when life feels unfair, you have to stop comparing your life to others. You have your own unique life and although you may have struggles, remember that everyone has struggles.
Nobody's life is perfect. It is easy to believe that other people have perfect lives and are living the life you want, but this could not be further from the truth because everyone has their own struggles, issues, and difficulties. In fact, everyone has felt as though life is unfair at some point in their life. Even if your friend, sibling, or favorite celebrity appears to be “living the dream," they also feel life can be cruel.
Another important thing you need to do when life feels unfair is to talk it out with God. There is something that happens when you go to Jesus in prayer and tell Him about your worries and concerns. He gives you the peace and comfort that only He can give. Maybe you should try talking it out with Jesus and see how you feel afterward.
Talking with Jesus about how you feel life is unfair allows you to get resentment and anxiousness off your chest, and, surprisingly, you will have a new heart of praise, worship, and joy. The Lord will remind you of all the blessings you have in Him and how much He loves you. He will remind you that even though we go through hardships every day, our time here is relatively short compared to an eternity of perfection with Him.
It is also helpful to remember that these negative feelings and hardships are temporary. Life is unfair, but we cannot allow bad times to dictate our lives and turn us into bitter people. Remember, we are looking forward to heaven, our eternal home with the Lord (2 Peter 1:11; Isaiah 9:7).
When life is feeling unfair, look forward to this day with joy. The Lord has been so good to us and given us so many things. Maybe we are not rich in material blessings, but we are rich in spiritual blessings. This is a beautiful thing to remember when we are overwhelmed, creating hope despite our circumstances.
With this being said, we should recall all of our blessings in Christ. When thoughts of unfairness creep into our minds, we need to think about the good things. As Paul tells us, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8). From what Paul tells us, our focus—our perspective for each day—should be fixated on God's constant blessings.
We do not need to dwell on feelings of unfairness, hatred, or bitterness. It is true that other people’s lives feel fair when ours are not, and, in a fallen world, that sometimes might be true. However, it is not healthy for us to live in a state such as this. If we continue to live with this type of headspace, we will only hurt ourselves and be ineffective for Jesus, robbing ourselves of God's lasting joy, peace, and hope. This is a goal of the devil’s and we do not need to give him the pleasure of causing us to fall.
Instead, we need to put on the full armor of God and take our stand against the devil (Ephesians 6:10-18). Dwelling on how God has “blessed” others more than you is not helpful nor is it true. God loves you and you are blessed in many ways. We often think of blessings in the form of large houses, fancy cars, and endless financial provisions, but this is not what Jesus teaches. Rather, these are teachings of the Prosperity Gospel, which is no gospel at all.
Jesus has blessed you in many ways, including dying for you to be given salvation. Do not allow feelings of jealousy to cause you to think others have it better than you. Praise the Lord that you know Him and that He has given you eternal life. Life will continue to be difficult and unfair, but it is not God’s fault. One day, He will make all things new and everything will be perfect, holy, and good (2 Peter 3:13).
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