Whether you're entertaining a room full of strangers or hosting your family for Thanksgiving, meaningful conversations can be difficult to achieve. This is especially true if you haven't seen family in quite some time or you're hosting acquaintances you don't know very well. Varying personalities can also contribute to a tough holiday season. Additionally, if it's been a tough year, you may dread having people ask you questions that may bring up old wounds or pain. They may also dread these same questions, which creates a disastrous holiday. You may look upon this holiday with dread because you're not quite sure how to start a conversation, but it doesn't have to be that way.
In the moments before Jesus was crucified, he spent time around a table eating and drinking with the Apostles. Although he knew a difficult time was ahead, he wanted to spend his last moments with the people he loved the most. Luke 22:14-20 says, “When the hour came, Jesus and his apostles reclined at the table. And he said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer. For I tell you, I will not eat it again until it finds fulfillment in the kingdom of God. After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, “Take this and divide it among you. For I tell you I will not drink again from the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.” And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.” In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.”
If Jesus spent his last moments on earth giving thanks for all God had done (and all God would do in the coming days), we can too. Jesus had every reason to look upon the coming days with dread in fear. Instead, he chose to have an attitude of gratitude. Thanksgiving does not have to be a holiday looked upon with dread but one filled with gratitude and blessing.
Here are five Icebreakers you can try this holiday:
Although most people asked this around their dinner table at Thanksgiving, this is always a great conversation starter. It is especially good for children to hear adults expressing gratitude for all God has done for them throughout the year. If the person can't think of anything to say, prompt them with ideas of things you are thankful for. It can be as simple as the roof over their head or as complex as being healed from a disease. If a member has just received word of an upcoming trial, use this icebreaker to encourage them that God sees them, knows them, and is in control of the situation.
It can seem as though a person who does not want to express thanks will put a damper on the mood around the table. By preparing for an unexpected lull in conversation, the intimacy shared around the table can be something that gives God glory because it allows the member to ponder and reflect on the things they have taken for granted.
This icebreaker may seem similar to asking what they are most thankful for, but it will make table members think about God differently. The word blessing is a buzzword people use whenever someone receives a big blessing (such as a financial one). But this icebreaker will make people think about all the little ways they are blessed and make them shift their perspective from one of being out of tune with the Spirit to seeing their lives from God's perspective. While a new baby, a promotion, or another blessing may be known to everyone at the table, this may feed into a spirit of competition. This may make other members feel as though they must compete to make their lives seem better than they are. Yet, we know that God blesses people in different ways and different amounts. By asking people to name little blessings, it will level the playing field so that other members don't feel they must outdo other people's responses.
This icebreaker helps people reflect on every Thanksgiving they have celebrated thus far. They can name a Thanksgiving from their childhood, or they can name a more recent one. Whichever Thanksgiving memory they name, ask them to tell you why. If they can't think of why, keep prodding them until they can come up with a reason. It can be as simple as breaking the wishbone or as memorable as last Thanksgiving with a loved one who is no longer with them. This icebreaker is not meant to bring up grief or sadness but rather put Thanksgiving in its proper perspective.
Because Thanksgiving gives way to Black Friday, it is easy to ignore the holiday and wait for Black Friday Deals instead. Without reflecting on the many blessings God gives us throughout the year, it's more difficult to enjoy advent as a time when we wait with great anticipation for the birth of our Savior. By remembering that the best blessings are around your dinner table, it will help every member at the table have an attitude of gratitude rather than an attitude of entitlement.
Although our days may be filled with many blessings, some of us may have tougher years than others. If people are having trouble naming blessings, ask them, “if you could do one thing over from his year, what would it be and why?” This may be awkward at first, but it gets people thinking about Christ and the power of redemption. Many situations, which may seem bleak, may be redeemed. Brainstorm as a team various ways these difficult situations may be changed into a joyous occasion. Family and friends may walk away encouraged and strengthened because of your conversation and realize God may have blessed them more than they realized.
If icebreaker questions don't get people talking, a good game might. After dinner, invite people to play your favorite game. It can be a card game, a word game, or other strategy game. However, the best games to get people talking are ones where you get to know people the best. Find a game that asks people interesting questions. When someone answers with a response you would not expect, ask them to elaborate. People love to talk about themselves and will appreciate someone asking them about their lives.
Thanksgiving is a holiday filled with fun, food, and family. Some family members may not enjoy the holiday as much because it forces them to reflect on how difficult their life circumstances may be right now. This is an opportunity to be a light in both believers’ and nonbelievers’ lives. By asking the right conversation starters, family and friends may instead look forward to many more Thanksgivings at your home in the years to come.
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