Kindness isn’t about us and our actions. It’s about showcasing our gracious and heavenly Father, being moved by the Holy Spirit to share His love through our generous acts of sincere kindness.
Leaving church Sunday morning, the enduring and heartfelt smiles we just shared with our fellow brothers and sisters slowly disappeared once our feet hit the parking lot pavement. Casual niceties slowly emerged into low grumbles, especially when my hubby mentioned we would be eating lunch at home since there was plenty of food in the pantry. Yet, rather than being grateful, the groans of complaint grew louder. The backseat quickly became a bickering battleground as arguments broke out over silly and trivial things. The car filled up with stifling tension, and from my side eye, I noticed my husband tight-knuckling the steering wheel and clenching his jaw. Yep! It was apparent that the message our pastor just delivered on embracing kindness seemed to simply graze right over this crew!
Come to think of it, kindness easily gets lost in the shuffle of life sometimes, doesn’t it? After all, we can hear a powerful message on the importance of being kind and still fail to carry it out less than fifteen minutes later! Oh, how I sincerely hope we aren’t the only family that leaves church only to find that sin meets us as soon as we step foot into the parking lot. Ugh!
Whether you deal with sin in your church parking lot or not, let me ask you this: Is your love kind? Better yet, how do you know? I ask this because we must check our hearts and put the precious virtue of kindness under the lens of our faith. The way the world views kindness and the way our God views kindness are indirectly different. So, how can we be sure that once we drive away from our congregations and enter the mission field we are aligning our hearts to share kindness in the way that pleases God?
Well, as the holiday of love draws near, let’s take a deeper look at what the Bible says about kindness and why it matters. Even more, let’s seek to understand how we can show kindness to those whom we deeply love, as well as to extended family, friends, and strangers alike.
Worldly Kindness versus Biblical Kindness
If you haven’t noticed, our society is bent on being kind. We see slogans that declare, “Be kind” or “Kindness matters” slathered all over t-shirts, mugs, and hanging in doorframes of local coffee shops. Yet, while there may be good intentions and motives behind these sayings, sometimes the heart behind them proves otherwise.
The world says kindness is a character trait that enables us to love ourselves and love others. But this worldly view of kindness comes with a few strings attached. For starters, worldly kindness promotes self and comes with a hefty dose of fanfare. We can’t deny that we live in a world that tells us to showcase our kindness and good deeds on every platform available, allowing us to relish in our egos and pump up our confidence. This kindness also commands reciprocity, often demanding something in return. Basically, the way the world views kindness is through reservation and is only given when one feels it’s beneficial or warranted.
Biblical kindness flips the script and takes this “character trait” that the world sees and calls it more of a divine attribute enveloped in God’s love. Biblical kindness is full of compassion, humility, and patience (Colossians 3:12). It comes with a humble heart that acts out of surrender, placing others first (Romans 12:10). It actively seeks out those who are poor in heart and spirit, offering a helping hand (Proverbs 19:17). God tells us that His kindness is tender-hearted and forgiving (Ephesians 4:32), exemplifying mercy (Zechariah 7:9). Kindness isn’t about us and our actions. It’s about showcasing our gracious and heavenly Father, being moved by the Holy Spirit to share His love through our generous acts of sincere kindness.
Side note: Now, before you go into the kitchen and pull out that cute coffee mug that proudly displays to “be kind,” or you see that slogan hanging up in your favorite local coffee shop, let it now be a sweet reminder that kindness is so much more than we make it out to be. Allow those words to give your heart a jolt and embrace kindness in the way our God does!
Why Kindness Matters
Biblical kindness shows a world that is desperate for the hope found in our God who embraces love through acts of selflessness. In a me-centered society, biblical kindness sees the hurt and pain of the lost and lonely and extends kindness without any limitations or reservations, often in secret and driven by unconditional love.
That means as believers we all have a call to be kind. We just have to answer it! God is using us to reach a broken world in need of His mercy and grace. When we show kindness in the form of compassion, humility, tender-heartedness, and service, we are essentially sharing God’s love with our children, family, friends, and, yes, even non-believers.
When we bestow kindness to our children, we are discipling them and providing an example of how to love others like Christ (John 13:35). When we love our husbands by kindly accepting their leadership and protection (Ephesians 5:21-24), we give way for our marriages to grow closer together and closer to God. When we are kind to our extended family and friends with our words, deeds, and actions, it fosters healthy relationships. When we lend a helping hand and serve those in need, it softens our hearts and allows us to see others the way God does. Dear sister, when we let the Holy Spirit lead and direct our actions, kindness will naturally pour out.
Ways to Clothe Yourself in Kindness
The well-known and beloved 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 lays out the beautiful attributes of love. Yet, while these verses are often eloquently shared at weddings, Paul offered these words to a very divided and rather selfish church that forgot how to love one another and show kindness. His message was clear: When we fail to love one another as Christ did, we miss the whole purpose of God’s love for us!
In Colossians 3:12, Paul lays out directives on how we are to live as followers of Jesus. We are first to hold on tightly to the truth that we are chosen, set apart, holy, and beloved. And, because we are children of God, we are to show compassion, kindness, humility, and patience.
Clothing ourselves in kindness comes with a daily choice of acknowledging who we are and Who we belong to by shedding light on His love through our actions. We must be willing to part ways with our former selves. The one that bends to selfishness and seeks understanding and recognition (2 Corinthians 5:17).
Being one with Christ, we have the ability to align our hearts to God’s will and heed discernment from the Holy Spirit. Then, and only then, can we bring kindness in the form of compassion, humility, patience, and forgiveness. When we accept these realities, we begin to see our fellow believers and those in desperate need of salvation in a whole new light. Recognizing that God’s grace was lovingly given to us allows us, through the power of the Holy Spirit, to share kindness in unique and meaningful ways. How neat is that?
So, take heart dear sister, and know that as you wake up in the morning and stumble into the closet to find something to wear, you are putting on so much more than a comfy pair of sweatpants or a sleek suit. You, beloved daughter, are preparing yourself to be patient with your children, humble before your spouse, gracious towards your siblings, or compassionate towards your neighbor and coworkers. Real, biblical kindness, changes everything. Let’s seek to embrace it!
Photo Credit: ©Getty ImagesProstock-Studio
