In an ideal world, our children would come home from Sunday School and rattle off Bible passage as well as three ways they can apply it in their daily lives. But let’s be honest, when we ask how Sunday School was, we might get an, “it was fine.” If we ask what they learned, perhaps we will hear a one-sentence synopsis.
Talking to our kids about their faith can sometimes be challenging. Not only do we think that we are ill-equipped to discuss theology, but it can often be uncomfortable relating to our kids on such a personal level. Yet, God designed us as parents to not only be the physical guardians of our children, but their spiritual nurturers as well. If you find yourself struggling to engage your children in spiritual conversation, here are 9 simple ways to talk about God with your kids in your day-to-day lives.
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1. Develop an intentional devotional time as a family.
Life is busy. It can be easy for us to schedule our day away if we are not careful. I have found that when I set aside time with my family to have a time where we connect with God and each other, I notice a difference in not only how my kids behave, but in how I relate to my family as well. The easier option is to provide our children with a devotional and hope they will read it on their own. Yet Scripture challenges parents to teach God’s commands to their children (Deuteronomy 6:6-7).
What is a strategy you can use to develop a devotional time with your family?
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2. Discuss prayer requests and include your own.
One morning, as I took my children to school, I asked how I could pray for them. My son told me about a test he felt anxious about. My daughter asked that we pray for her to have a good day with her friends. I then asked each of my kids to pray for me and their dad as we had to make some important decisions regarding whether to sell our home or not. I told my kids that we wanted to make a wise decision and we wanted God to lead the decision. As we pulled into the school, we said a prayer, inviting God to guide our day. While this is a simple example, it illustrates an amazing opportunity we have as parents to practice James 5:16 with our family.
When is a time you can discuss prayer requests with your child?
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3. Strategically place Scripture in your children's lives.
My kids love getting personalized notes from me. When I write them a quick note and place it in their lunchbox or on their bed, it makes them feel loved and encouraged. Recently, I have tried to become more intentional about placing Scripture in places where they will find these “love notes” from God.
Where is one place you can strategically place Scripture for your child to find?
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4. Listen for "God moments" within your conversations with your kids.
Recently, my daughter came home in a terrible mood. In my flesh, I would want to avoid conflict and let her storm off to her room to vent. However, I felt the Spirit nudge me to gently prompt her to talk through her pain. Through a difficult discussion, I was able to relate to her God’s unconditional love.
Sometimes, our tendency as parents is to forget to lean into how the Spirit is moving within a conversation. We allow our emotions and frustrations to cloud our judgment. However, Scripture encourages us to always allow our conversations to be full of grace and seasoned with salt so that we may know how to give an answer to everyone (Colossians 4:6). This verse includes our children.
How can you become a better listener for your child?
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5. Learn to ask thought provoking questions about your child's faith.
Have you ever tried to have a spiritual conversation with your child, only to receive one-worded responses? I remember asking my kids about what they learned in Sunday school each week, only to be answered with the name of the disciple they studied that particular week. Our conversation felt like an interrogation. I soon decided to change my approach. I started asking my children to describe their activities and to try to remember the details of the Bible story. I tried to think of my own life application questions to the particular topic they were studying. In return, we started engaging in a biblical narrative about their faith. They began to see how what they learned on Sunday morning related to their daily lives.
What is a question you can ask your child this week to stimulate a faith discussion?
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6. Memorize Scripture with your kids.
My daughter goes to a private school where she has a weekly Bible memory verse. This has given me an opportunity to grow in my own Scripture memory. We often make up motions to coincide with the words to the passages. I am amazed at her retention of verses she memorized months ago. What is most rewarding is when we are able to apply these passages to an area of her life. Because I memorized the Scripture with her, I can recall the verse and we can recite it together. There is great power in being able to say Scripture with your child when they need to hear an encouraging word from the Lord.
What is an action step you can take to memorize Scripture with your children?
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7. Express to your kids how God is actively at work in your life.
My children detest being lectured to. However, they LOVE a good story. Jesus was a brilliant storyteller. He used parables to teach truth to his disciples instead of just listing commands at them. I am trying to learn from the Greatest Teacher in how I instill truth into my children. When I see them tune out during one of my spiels, I redirect and illustrate how God has taught me. They begin to see my vulnerability and respond accordingly.
What steps can you take to talk about your relationship with the Lord to your children?
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8. Encourage moments of thanksgiving.
I remember telling my kids to “say thank you” to their relatives after receiving a gift. Gratefulness is not only polite, it’s a core value when it comes to our spiritual lives. God has challenged me to encourage my kids to build an attitude of thanksgiving into their daily lives, recognizing Him as the Giver of all good things. Moments of thanksgiving could consist of asking for a praise report at the end of the day. It could mean saying a prayer of thanks in the morning. My personal challenge for my family is to get my children to see thanksgiving beyond the kitchen table and to make it a part of all parts of their day.
What ways can you think of to encourage thanksgiving in your daily routine?
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9. Worship God through service.
My most cherished moments with my children come when we are able to show the love of Christ to others through service. It is through ministry that I have been able to teach my children many of lessons of Jesus. As we live as Christ lived, and serve as He served, my kids are able to see that love has no boundaries. It is a beautiful picture of the universal church and the coming together of all gifts. My children are able to begin to see how God has uniquely gifted and equipped them for His kingdom. I am able to encourage them along the way as they discover God’s plan and purpose for their lives.
Where can your family serve together for the benefit of God’s kingdom?
Cortney Whiting is a wife and mother of two wonderfully energetic children. She received her Masters of Theology Degree from Dallas Theological Seminary. After serving in the church for nearly 15 years, Cortney currently serves as a lay-leader and writes for various Christian ministries. You can find her at her blog, Unveiled Graces.
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Originally published Wednesday, 30 January 2019.
