Growing up in the mission field of Iran, a country where people are desperately searching for truth and freedom, I learned to live a life that was intentionally mission-driven.
From a young age, I developed a vision for eternity, for my future on this earth and for the Kingdom of God. I made choices this way. My parents never had to worry about steering us away from the big ‘no’s (drugs, alcohol, sex...)—ultimately because these kinds of actions were so plainly the farthest things from our focus. Rather, my attention was captivated by my heavenly Father's business, my eyes fixated on building His Kingdom.
Instead of incessantly telling me “no,” my parents so often told me “yes,” stirring my faith walk into deeper boldness.
Today, I raise my children with a similar approach. I want them to have a vision for their future—for the fulfilling marriage they could enjoy, for the impact they can potentially make in their communities and workplaces, for the kind of fruit they may bear and for the extraordinary adventures they will inevitably have with God.
We have eternity set before us, and therefore, we live by that paramount perspective in our home. It changes everything. I want my children to fully understand that they are ambassadors of the Kingdom and fathom the holy responsibility that accompanies the gift of the Holy Spirit. My hope is that they make positive differences in people's lives everywhere they go, transforming their worlds for the sake of Jesus and further emphasizing Paul’s message:
“Whatever you do, do it from the heart, as something done for the Lord and not for people, knowing that you will receive the reward of an inheritance from the Lord. You serve the Lord Christ.” Colossians 3:23-24
Jesus came to set us free. This reality has the potential to transform us. How wonderful it would be to enjoy the fullness of what Jesus has won for us—and to set our sights on the same for others?
“For freedom, Christ set us free. Stand firm then, and don’t submit again to a yoke of slavery.” Galatians 5:1
As parents, we often feel inclined to control our children. Yet, when we look at the Gospel, we see that God our Father does not control us; He does not force us to conform. Rather, He has given us true freedom from bondage through salvation, filling us with His joyous Spirit, encouraging us to be all that we were meant to be and allowing us to receive a never-ending fullness of life—all on this side of heaven. We are free to choose. And our choices are powerful. Oh, that we would choose well!
Because of this, I want to empower my own children to understand the responsibility and power of good choices. I want to imitate the freeing love of Jesus to them by creating a safe space where they experience freedom in decision-making so that they learn for themselves how to make wise choices. I could control them to the point that they behave and conform perfectly, but I will have robbed them of crucial opportunities for growth and of a healthy understanding of what life with Jesus could look like.
Iranian culture is the exact opposite. Parenting styles (and political leadership) in Iran are oftentimes authoritarian—parents are heavily involved in their children’s major life decisions, such as their career paths and future spouses. The government controls how Iranians dress, the they consume, how men and women are allowed to interact with each other and so much more.
Alternatively, life in the West is entirely about liberty and our personal right to choose nearly anything. Given this overwhelming responsibility of freedom, I want to equip my children for adulthood—teaching them to think for themselves wisely. Guided by the Spirit, it is our duty as parents to establish healthy boundaries, bestow holy wisdom and initiate ongoing discussions in safe, open spaces. In allowing our children to have a voice in these parenting discussions, we are able to ask them questions that open lines of communication, establish guidance and motivate them in their spiritual giftings. The following are a few examples of questions that can lead these important discussions:
-How much screen time do you think would be good for you?
-How much candy is too much?
-Do you think going to that place will be good and helpful?
-Have you spent time reading the Bible, and how can I help you fit that into your daily routines better?
-Who is the Lord calling you to pray for this week?
I have learned the value of freedom because I was born in a country where freedom hardly exists. Just as I long for God’s Spirit of freedom to consume the culture of Iran, I also so deeply desire for my own children to know what it means to be free in Christ Jesus—to see things as God does, to walk with joyful boldness in the Spirit and to change lives for Kingdom growth—ultimately inviting others into that same freedom.
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 2 Corinthians 3:17
Regardless of where the Lord takes us in ministry, let us never fail to prioritize the ministry opportunities within our own homes. Raising our children is one of the most important mission callings throughout our lives, and a significant part of this is inviting our children into ministry alongside us.
Our children are not collateral to our call; rather, they are a crucial part of our Kingdom journey in ministry. Instead of expecting them to “survive” or “cope with” the ramifications of our own ministries, we can anticipate their participation in and benefit from our call to live on mission. We are on mission together!
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
Coming from Iran, a persecuted nation, I became heavily reliant on the day-to-day leading of God. I never want to lose the divine benefit of that intimate reliance just because I live in America. In the same way, teaching our children to involve God in every decision, big or small, will ultimately transform their lives. May they run to God with questions like:
-Where should I go to school?
-What electives should I take?
-Who should I spend time with?
-Who should I date/marry?
-Where should I go on vacation?
-Where should I go to youth group?
God wants to be part of these decisions. Even the small decisions in life have the potential to change the directory of our lives. Jesus always knows the best path for us. I want to help my children learn how to live led by the Holy Spirit so they choose the very best in every circumstance.
“For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Philippians 1:21
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Thiago Cerqueira
Lana Silk serves as Chief Executive Officer (USA) of Transform Iran. In this role, Lana actively seeks to bring freedom to the people of Iran, transforming the nation into one which bears the image of Christ. Through ministry and humanitarian aid, Lana hopes that Transform Iran will create divine change in the lives of the Iranian people. She is tri-lingual and considers it her life calling to represent and advocate for the people of Iran in the West. Lana currently lives with her husband and three children in Ohio, actively operating Transform Iran’s mission.