Do you struggle to have a quiet time with God because you believe it has to look a certain way? Do you find yourself preoccupied with perfecting the ritual, rather than truly experiencing the peace of drawing near to the One we need to spend it with?
As a mom of three, with kids ranging from ages 6 to 12, I have a few years of experience battling to find my own quiet time. I’ve tried waking up early before the kids, staying up late after they are tucked in, and everything in between. The problem is when I based my own quiet time off of their schedules, I quickly became frustrated when a monkey wrench was thrown in. After becoming a parent, I learned how instantaneously routines can be thrown off-kilter. Sickness, a teething baby, a last-minute change of plans, etc. A lot of these things affected their waking and bedtimes, which in return affected me. I learned to stop basing when my quiet time would take place around such things.
If I didn’t get my quiet time done in the morning, I assumed I would make time for it when they went to bed. However, if you are like me, around five o’clock this was the furthest thing from my mind. Instead, I was thinking about all the things I was going to achieve when the kids went to bed. I was going to finish the load of laundry, clean out and organize that drawer and closet, finish that book I started reading months ago, fill out the baby book for the 6-year-old that I had yet to do. I literally thought I was going to do ALL the things.
What would actually happen when the kids went to bed a few hours later looked more like hitting a brick wall of exhaustion once I had changed into pajamas. So instead, I would find myself on the couch, TV remote in hand, because my brain wanted nothing more than to unwind with a show, and quiet time would get pushed to the next day’s mental to-do list.
What I learned over the years is that having quiet time will look different than the preconceived notion I once had. I needed to carve out time within the confines of motherhood, even if it felt mundane, knowing that the small morsels I could find here and there were better than nothing. No, they were precious. I realized it wasn’t audible silence I needed, but a quieting of the soul, an open heart, and intentionally seeking time with my creator.
Here Are 10 Mom Hacks for Carving out a Quiet Time:
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Sometimes putting something on our calendar is the best way to carve out time for it. As moms we are constantly adding things to our schedules that we don’t want to forget. Doctor appointments, playdates, school functions, etc. When we shape our days in ways that allow us to have time for these things, they are more likely to happen.
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I am constantly in the car. Between school drop offs/pickups, playdates, kids’ practices, and all the regular “mom” errands, I often feel as if I live in my minivan, and I can assure you it looks as if I do. It’s easy to want to throw on a podcast during a drive or scroll Instagram while waiting in the pickup line, which I do often, but sometimes I try to use this time to talk to God, or just be silent. I’ve even taken out my phone and read the bible from my daily reading plan on it instead of opening my app of choice.
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It’s easy to think we are alone in the busyness and chaos motherhood can bring, but we aren’t. Ask a friend if she wants to do a kid swap. You watch her kids while she gets some time away and you get the same while she watches yours. We remember to do this when we have appointments, or date nights, but why not utilize our friends the same way to help us create a quiet time?
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There is nothing like taking a walk and breathing in fresh air. If you have little ones, put them in the stroller with a snack, letting yourself take in God’s beauty while you stroll.
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Often when I need to clear my mind and spend time with God, I will pull out my journal. Even if the kids are running around, loud and playing, the act of putting pen to paper and sharing my thoughts with him helps me to feel his presence more.
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Every single day at some point I find myself doing some form of laundry, cooking a meal, or doing dishes. It is often in between parenting a disagreement, or helping a child with homework, but there are also moments where I put on some kind of show I have seen several times, simply for background noise during the tedious tasks. However, this is a perfect time to spend with God as we have many of them throughout our day.
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My friend and I used to take turns hosting a playdate. While our kids were entertained playing with each other, we would do a Bible study together. Sometimes our quiet time doesn’t always have to be spent alone. By doing Bible studies together we were able to be transparent with each other about our sins and struggles, allowing us to pray for each other. It’s been sweet to be able to look back and see how God has worked in our lives through each other.
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There is something that happens to me when I put on worship music. I could be having a bad morning or afternoon, but the simple act of turning on music and reminding myself of the truth of the lyrics I’m listening to can totally change my attitude.
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Just simply coming to God and talking with him is a form of quiet time. This can happen when you sneak away to use the bathroom, switch a load of laundry, or even walk to your mailbox to check your mail.
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After a long day, when my weary head finally hits the pillow, I try to end my day with one last conversation with God. Often I fall asleep while I’m praying, but nonetheless I try to take this final moment of the day that I’ve been given, and give it back to him.
Motherhood is beautiful, but at times exhausting. Whether we find ourselves parenting babies, toddlers, or teenagers, it can be loud and chaotic. Let us find the moments, even in the chaos, to continue to draw near to God. Remember that carving out quiet time with him can help us be better moms. This time may look different throughout various seasons of our mothering. Yet, the truth remains that God will show up and meet us right where we are when we continue to seek him. Quiet time doesn’t have to be in silence, it just needs the intentional quieting of your heart, and seeking him exactly where you are.
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