You know the greatest thing about being in a relationship with someone else? Knowing that you are in the right relationship. There’s no better feeling than knowing that you got it right with the person you are with. With the right partner, you will find fulfillment, peace, and love the way God designed for you.
When I met my husband, the desire for all of these things were present. We definitely weren’t the perfect couple; we had to work through our differences with some of the things I am going to mention, but the desire was definitely there to be better for one another! And I think that’s the overarching point: working with one another to make these things
Maybe you are single and waiting for the right person to come into your life, but you don’t know what things to look for. Or, perhaps you’re in a relationship now and you’re having some doubts. There are certainly red flags that come up that are signs that you should be running the opposite way from a partner. On the flip side, there are things that let you know that you’re with the right person and that the relationship has the potential to go the distance!
Here are 10 Way to Know You’re in the Right Relationship:
1. Mutual Vision for the Future
When you are in the right relationship, you share a mutual vision with your significant other for the future. Being in agreement about what the future may hold is awesome because that says that the both of you see actually see future, and you see it together. Togetherness and having a mutual understanding about where you are going is a good indication that you both are on the same page!
If you’re not sure you share a mutual vision, take some time to ask your significant other some important questions. What are his/her dreams for the future? What goals does he or she hope to accomplish? Do you agree on having children, on important faith issues? Make sure you’re both walking on the same path and not different ones.
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2. You Honor One Another
The definition of honor is to hold someone or something in high esteem or respect, or to treat them or it as a privilege. When you are in the right relationship, you will know because that person will be so thankful to have you that they will honor the person you are. They may not throw you a party every single day (don’t we all wish that were the case?!) but they will definitely not let it go unnoticed how important you are to them. The right relationship increases the quality of your life!
Warning signs to look out for: does this person regularly tell you how he or she wishes you would change something about yourself? Are you guilty of doing that? Does your significant other regularly joke on you or put you down in front of family and friends, or do they have good things to say about you to others (and vice versa!).
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3. Sacrifice is Present of the Relationship
Sacrifice is beautiful because it is a by-product of love. With that said, sacrifice is tough stuff. Often times, we are asked to sacrifice the very thing that we don’t want to sacrifice, at the times that aren’t very convenient for us and that can be hard. When a person is willing to sacrifice something for you, they are showing you their love for you, and that’s an indicator that you’re in the right relationship. Additionally, sacrifice doesn’t remind us down the line of what was done for us as to hold it over our heads. Sacrifice, in whatever way it comes, is a sign that we are admired, thought highly of, and dearly loved.
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4. Respect for Standards
Everyone has different standards. As a Christian, some standards are simply non-negotiable. Things like violence, sex before marriage, and monogamy, etc. When you are in the right relationship, the person you are with will respect the standards you have. They won’t try to manipulate you into changing or bending them. Standards help keep a relationship pure and when a person respects those standards, it says a lot about how much they value you.
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5. There Is Peace
Have you ever simply had peace about something? Whether it was a new job that you just accepted, or a church that you’ve been visiting and thinking about joining, the presence or absence of peace usually was an indicator that you were in the right place or not. The same goes for relationships. The peace of God is present where the Spirit of the Lord is. You absolutely want the Holy Spirit present in your relationship! This isn’t to say that you won’t ever have disagreements with your significant other or that you won’t have hard times. This just means that when you’re with that person, your spirit is still. You aren’t anxious or worried about where you stand with them. There’s peace.
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6. You Protect One Another
Protection is a big deal because it says a lot about the value someone has of you. We protect the things that are most precious to us. We pray over those things, watch over them, put insurance on them (hahaha), etc. You want to know that the person you are in a relationship with values you enough to protect you from harm! The condition of our hearts and minds are so important to the health of our relationships, so when they are protected in a relationship, that can give you the green light that you are in the right one.
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7. Natural Attraction
Let’s be honest here, we all want to be attracted to the person that we are in a relationship with. This attraction can be physical, mental, or spiritual, but when we are in the right relationship, there is an x-factor about said person that separates them from all others. It’s what makes them “right” for us as individuals. When I met my husband, we knew within a very short span of time that we were each other’s person. We felt safe enough with each other to be our full selves because of the mutual attraction. I didn’t need to force my attraction to him, and vice versa. This may not be the case for other people in that they may not recognize right away that the person they are seeing at the moment is their person. Immediate attraction does not equal natural attraction. The point is that the attraction, when it hits, isn’t forced.
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8. You Grow With the Person, Not Apart
This one takes time to tell, but you know that you are in the right relationship when who you are becoming complements the person that your significant other is becoming. We all change as people because we all grow and mature (at least, that’s the idea as we become older, that we grow). We all grow at different times and in different ways, so where our partner is in their journey of becoming shouldn’t dictate whether they are right for us or not. What’s more important is that you’re able to flow with, adapt to, and walk alongside them, and they be able to do the same with you.
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9. Acceptance of Faults and Shortcomings
Another way to know that you are in the right relationship is that you will accept that your significant other has faults and shortcomings, and vice versa. We are all works in progress and it’s pretty unrealistic to think that our partner will simply have it all together. God is doing a work in all of us that is going to look different from person to person. There’s going to be some things that they may struggle with or things that is part of their character that is opposite to your’s. In the right relationship, this is acknowledged, accepted, and both people encourage, are patient, and pray for one another in those areas.
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10. God Blesses the Relationship
When your relationship is blessed by God, you can be certain that he is pleased with your relationship and pleasing God should be high on the list of priorities in your relationship! The blessing of the Lord brings favor, increase, and just all around goodness to you. So how does your relationship get in position to be blessed by God? To be honest, you cannot manipulate the Lord, so you can’t have impure motives and fake obedience to God to get Him to put his stamp of blessing on you. You can honor His word with a clean heart and place Him first within the bounds of your relationship. There is nothing like having the hand of the Lord on your relationship!
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Britnee is a free-spirited, Old Navy-wearin', coffee-shop lovin', wife and momma. She serves in the worship ministry with her husband at their home church in Glendale, AZ and writes with the sole purpose of pointing others to Christ. You can catch up with her on her blog or via Instagram and Facebook.
Originally published Monday, 04 December 2017.
