Many married couples choose not to attend church together. Due to different denominational beliefs, some couples opt to go to different churches. For example, maybe a Methodist married a Presbyterian. Because of this reason, they choose to attend different churches, with the former going to a Methodist church and the latter going to a Presbyterian church. While this is understandable, sometimes it is not the best route to go. As a married couple, there needs to be unity.
If a husband and a wife are not attending church together, it could reflect to the world a bad sign. For one, when a husband or a wife goes to church alone, they could become an easy target for temptation. A husband or a wife might find a "church wife" or a "church husband" and quickly fall into temptation. Attending church together is an intimate experience and it is not one that married couples should overlook.
Rather than choosing to go to different churches, going to the same church together is beneficial. This will help your marriage, deepen trust, and cultivate your faith as a married couple. Even though many people will think it is extreme to ensure married couples go to the same church, there can be many drawbacks of a couple not attending the same church. Try to attend the same church as your spouse and see the difference it makes in your marriage.
Here are six benefits of attending church together as a married couple.
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1. A Deeper Connection
Attending church together has significant benefits, including cultivating a deeper connection. Going to church together will help you feel a deeper, more intimate connection with your spouse because you are doing something together. Sadly, few couples spend time together throughout the week because of job restraints. However, this is something that needs to change if we are going to truly build up our marriages in the Lord. If you and your spouse are not currently attending church together, try to start.
It might be hard to commit to one church, but try to remember the benefits. You can deepen your marriage and truly get to know your spouse better. Attending church together will allow you to talk about the sermon, what God told you through the Bible verses, and how you felt during worship. Married couples do not need to overlook this benefit because it can truly help your marriage and bring you closer together.
If a married couple continues to attend different churches, this deep connection will not exist. Rather than being involved in each other's lives, it could be that Sundays are a day we won't ever see our spouse. They will be at church, involved with another community of believers, and start developing deep connections with the people at this particular church. As a married couple, you and your spouse need to go to church together, build relationships with other believers together, and strive to worship God with one heart.
2. Unified Devotion to the Lord
When a married couple attends church together, they will have a unified devotion to the Lord. This is ultimately what God wants for our marriage. Our marriage must be built upon the Lord and faithfully follow His instructions for marriage (Ephesians 5:21-33). We won't be able to have a unified devotion to the Lord apart from attending church together. Church is a cornerstone of our Christian walk; therefore, it makes no sense why we wouldn't want our spouse to attend the same church.
Going to church together means you will be able to build each other up in the Lord, encourage one another from the sermon message, and discuss any key topics you have been learning about God in your own personal devotion time. If you and your spouse start doing men and women Bible studies at your church, this will also be a good thing to talk about on your drive home and over lunch. While we don't have to be with our spouse 24/7, attending church together as a united team is beneficial.
3. Stability in Marriage
Most of us want stability in our marriage. An unstable marriage can lead to much stress, heartache, and bitterness. Rather than feeding into an unstable marriage, we need to strive for stability. Even if your marriage isn't stable right now, going to church together will be a catalyst for positive change. On the other hand, it could be that you feel your marriage is stable, but you want to strengthen it more. Either way, you and your spouse will benefit from attending church together.
Stability will come to your marriage through attending church together because you will start involving God in your life and your marriage. Instead of going to different churches or having one spouse go to church while the other stays home, start going together. Your marriage can only thrive if both partners are devoted to the Lord and dedicated to one another. Attending church together will build this stability and ensure your marriage will be able to withstand any storm.
4. Chance to Grow in the Community of Believers Together
If a married individual attends a church by themselves, they will quickly start building relationships with the believers at the church. Their partner won't have any idea who these other people are and they will begin to feel left out of their spouse's life. This could even breed jealousy or quarrels amongst married couples. Rather than allowing this to happen, married couples need to attend church together, build community together, and form friendships together.
Doing this will ensure you and your spouse have the same friends at church and build a community together. There won't be any discord or fights because you and your spouse know everyone at church together. You will be present with each other, and everyone will know you are a married couple. This will help your marriage grow stronger and act as a protective barrier against any temptation or potential infidelity.
Growing in the community of believers is a beautiful thing if it is done correctly. From the moment you marry your spouse, you become one flesh (Genesis 2:24). This means that you are a united team. With this gift from the Lord, ensure you are building friendships with those at church in a noble way. Attend church together and avoid the pitfalls that could happen if you stray away from your spouse.
5. Established a Foundation for the Future
We cannot discuss the benefits of attending church together as a married couple without addressing the truth that it will help you establish a foundation for the future. If you don't have children yet, by going to church together now, it will help lay a foundation for your children. Your children won't be confused as to which church they are going to this week or if they are going to church at all. Instead, they will confidently know which church they will be attending and form friendships of their own.
Establishing a foundation for the future will benefit your marriage even if you don't choose to have children. Having a regular church you and your spouse attend will help your marriage be more intentional. Intentionally attending the same church as a married couple will show in other areas of your life. If you are the spouse who starts going to church or leaves your previous church to start attending the same one as your spouse, it will show them that you care about them, their preferences, and your future together.
This will help your marriage become strong. Intentionality goes a long way and can bring your marriage to a better place. Everyone wants to know their spouse loves them and will go out of their way to best support them. If you want to lay an established foundation for the future of your marriage, start attending church together. This might mean leaving a church you have attended for years, but forming a deeper bond with your spouse will be worth it.
6. A Happier Relationship
Lastly, it is also important to mention the benefit of having a happier marriage by attending church together. Think about it—if you and your spouse have attended different churches for years, it has probably caused at least one problem. Maybe one of you has to catch a ride with someone else, or there are arguments every Sunday morning or Saturday night. Instead of allowing an unhappy marriage to continue, start making changes. Attend church together with your spouse for one Sunday and see how much happier it makes your spouse as well as yourself.
As mentioned, church is an intimate event that spouses should attend together. Your spouse will be happy that you chose to come with them and that you desire to be with them on Sunday morning. With time, your marriage will start becoming more joyful every other day of the week because you have built a new connection with your spouse. Try this exercise for one week and see how it changes your marriage for the better.
Over a few weeks or a few months, your marriage will be much more fulfilling. You and your spouse will be happier, and you will both have a stronger bond with Jesus. At the end of the day, we need to remember we are on the same team as our spouse; we should want to attend church together. It will help our marriage become stronger, closer, and more intentional. Start with small changes today and see how they help your marriage bloom into the marriage God wants for your life.
Originally published Monday, 09 September 2024.
