8 Powerful Ways a Christian Dad Is Meant to Reflect Father God

God is the source of all life, and Psalm 139 reminds us He fashions each person in the womb. He is also present for His children. God never left His people alone (Exodus 29:45-46). He took care of them in the wilderness and provided instruction and motivation through His Word and the prophets — for those willing to seek Him — even through the 400 “silent years.” Moses said God’s continuing presence with His people would set them apart from other people groups (Exodus 33:14-16).

Fatherhood is a relationship. It begins when his child is conceived. As their children grow, Christian dads should help them understand the father-child relationship — what it means and what is expected. 

After a child’s birth, the father’s presence is meant to continue in the home. Research shows that children are negatively affected when their dads are absent or not engaged with them. Because of this, dads should never leave all childcare and child development to their children’s mom.

Photo credit: Unsplash/Humphrey Muleba

God is love. He expressed that love to Jesus and spent time with Him (Mark 1:11, 35); and He demonstrated His love to those who were actively rebellious against Him. God dearly loves His trusting children, and that love is not contingent on their actions. His love is perfect, eternal, infinite, and unfailing.

All dads should love and encourage their children, but sadly, many do not. Some fathers’ love is selfish, manipulative, and conditional. But Christian dads will want to model godly love. This includes affirmation. Children’s identities are positively shaped by knowing they are loved and accepted by their dads. 

Although 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a is often quoted in reference to marriage, the attributes listed in the so-called “love chapter” can also operate in parenting. Fathers might substitute the words “a Christan dad” for the words “love” and “it” to get an idea of what loving fatherhood looks like.

Christian fathers can interact in love with their children in numerous ways. They could spend quality time with their children in active, face-to-face conversations. They can learn to relate to their children as individuals with unique gifts. They can speak positively about their children’s mother. They can — through stories appropriately shared — help their children avoid costly or devastating mistakes such as those made in the family’s history.

Photo credit:  ©Getty Images/Maria Korneeva

God leads and guides His children, with authority, in the way they should go. By studying stories of biblical leaders, we can understand positive characteristics of leadership, including love, a servant’s attitude, truth-telling, integrity, purity, initiative, courage, humility, etc.

A man’s leadership in the home is noted in Ephesians 5:23 regarding his wife, and in Ephesians 6:4 regarding his children. Dads are to guide with the goal of cultivating solid character and godliness as their children grow toward adulthood. Children can become overwhelmed, and sometimes dads need to step in to lead their children to places of rest, much as God does with His own children (Psalm 23:2-3).

Children need intentional guidance — even when they don’t appear to want or need it. Children are born in sin and require parental leadership to understand the consequences of their sin. Even cooperative children need guidance so they will not be confused or defeated when the trials of life come.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/noblige

God gives us His wisdom and it is meant to be passed on to the next generation (Psalm 78:1-8). Paul instructed Timothy about the power of the Scriptures to teach, rebuke, correct, and train in righteousness. While the apostle specifically addressed the “servant of God,” the truth is also applicable in working with children. The Father instructed His Son through the Scriptures, and those who heard Jesus speak were amazed at His understanding. 

Fathers in the Old Testament purposefully taught their children God’s law, beginning with the Ten Commandments. King Solomon told his sons to pay attention to his instruction so they would “gain understanding” about life. Under the New Covenant, the Holy Spirit is the Instructor for God’s children (John 14:26; 16:13). 

In today’s culture, many fathers ignore teaching their children about God; and even in much of the church, fathers’ instruction regarding God’s instruction is neglected. That responsibility is often left to mothers and others. But God has urged believing dads — as His appointed leaders in the home — to teach their children to love and honor Him and to be obedient in the home. 

Christian instruction must be valued and intentionally taught. Dads teach by both word and example, and they can use teachable moments in everyday living to instruct their children.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/aldomurillo

God is described as a protector in the Old Testament. For example, in Psalm 68:5 He is a protector of orphans and widows; and there are many examples of God protecting Israel. David described God as his “rock,” his protector and refuge. In the New Testament, we see from the example of Joseph with Mary that a father’s protection begins when his wife becomes pregnant.

Dads don’t need a body-builder physique to protect their children and help them feel secure. They simply need to be dependable and strong (and there are many kinds of strength). Dads are meant to be a reliable refuge for their children. 

However, just because a father should protect his children, that does not mean he should spare them from challenges. Even Father God allowed great hardship for His Son (Isaiah 53:10-11), purposing to use Jesus’ suffering to create the beauty of redemption. Earthly fathers are wise to challenge their children to do hard things with perseverance, so they can do all God calls them to do. 

A loving Christian dad also protects his children with biblical counsel to help them avoid evil and triumph over temptations.

Photo credit: Pexels/Pixabay

God disciplines us, and we should not despise that discipline because, in love, He disciplines us for our good (Proverbs 3:11-13; Hebrews 12:5-11). In the Old Testament, God included the story of Eli, a Jewish priest, who discovered what happens when a father, with mistaken or mushy sentimentality, fails to discipline his children (1 Samuel 2:27-36). 

Fathers are supposed to correct their children, but not harshly. Discipline must never be confused with anger. Fathers must wisely control their attitudes and responses as they discipline so they do not exasperate their children, provoking them to anger (Ephesians 6:4). Godly discipline shows itself in loving, compassionate correction with encouragement.

Correction is a “biggie” for dads, and it warrants further explanation. A helpful five-step pattern for good discipline is found in Genesis 3, which shows how God handled the first couple’s sin. 

1. It begins in verse 9 with “Where are you?” Offenses can erect walls of anger or shame. For concerned correction, always look for the child if he or she is hiding.

2. In verses 11-13, God asked, “What is this you have done?” More information might be needed, but be careful not to phrase questions in ways that might encourage the child to lie. 

3. In verses 14-19, God says, “Because you have done this…” God spelled out the consequences for their sin. State consequence clearly, specifically, and calmly. 

4. In verse 21, we see that “God made garments.” Why? Once their eyes were open to sin, God had to kill an innocent animal to cover their nakedness. Consequences should always reflect a cause-and-effect approach. Again, be compassionate, not harsh. 

5. In verses 22-24, God followed through with the consequences. Verse 23 begins, “So the LORD God banished…” God’s action has been described as a “severe mercy” because He loved the first couple too much to let them continue in sin anywhere near the Tree of Life where, if they ate of it, they would remain in their sins forever.

Don’t be hesitant to follow through with age-appropriate consequences that will help the child learn to avoid sin.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Inside Creative House

God provides for all of creation, and He provides good gifts to His children when they ask Him. God knows what His children need and He promises to provide (Matthew 6:31-32; Philippians 4:19).

Although there are exceptions, dads are meant to be the “breadwinners” in the home. But dads don’t provide simply by going to work and paying the bills. They also provide by helping to take care of the home and making house repairs. Fixing and building things are two loving ways a dad can serve His wife and children. 

Christian dads might also consider how they could provide special, tangible gifts that will help their children focus on and follow Father God or develop strong character. This might include a new Bible, a trip to a Bible camp, or a concert by a godly musician.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/andreswd

God is a great forgiver. Daniel 9:9 says, “The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving, even though we have rebelled against him.” Jesus symbolized how forgiving God is when He shared the parable of the prodigal (Luke 15:11-32). God has open arms for sinners who come for salvation, and He always welcomes His repentant children.

Likewise, dads need to be great forgivers because children are often foolish and disobedient. Christian fathers are not to hold grudges or become vindictive when their children make these wrong choices. Rather, they must model the forgiving heart of God. 

Forgiveness in the home is a serious matter. Jesus in Matthew 6:14, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” That “other people” includes our children.

It’s Normal for a Christian Dad to Feel Intimidated

God is perfect, and earthly fathers are not. It’s easy for men to feel intimidated by what God expects regarding fathering. They may feel insufficient for the job, and that’s normal. When dads notice their lack, they need to seek God for help and change because, in trying to represent God to their children, they will need God’s grace to cover their shortcomings. 

Throughout this struggle, Christian fathers should never lose sight of one crucial goal: pointing their children to the ultimate Father who can help them long after their earthly dad has passed from the earth.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/seb_ra