Prayer, by definition, is communication with God. Sounds simple, right? Just talking and listening. Yet, we complicate it as Christians. So many of us tend to only pray when we need something, which essentially chalks God up to no more than a genie. Yikes! That sounds awful, but that’s the mindset we can default to if we’re not careful.
I think that’s part of why Paul tells us to pray without ceasing. The more we pray, the more mature our prayers become. The closer we feel to God, the more we desire the things of God, and the more our prayers get answered. It’s a beautiful cycle but a cycle that will never start if we don’t take the first step toward making prayer a priority.
1 Thessalonians 5:14-18 (ESV) says, "And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
(I also love how Paul sandwiches the command to pray without ceasing between rejoicing and giving thanks—almost like he’s giving us a formula for how to pray!)
Here are five truths about praying without ceasing:
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1. Your Physical Posture Doesn't Matter
When we’re little, we tend to close our eyes and bow our heads to pray, probably because the pastor from the pulpit or our Sunday School teachers always told us to. Or maybe we saw it demonstrated at the dinner table with our parents and siblings. That’s all fine and well—after all, that posture shows a measure of respect. Bowing the head is a sign of deference to someone else, in this case, God. Kneeling is also a common physical posture of prayer that also offers a measure of reverence. Some people even like to pray face down on the floor, fully prone before God, in full surrender. Those prayers are most often not casual, but rather heartfelt and desperate.
Whatever your position is, you can pray. Sitting up at work at your desk, lying in bed at night, cozied up in your favorite chair with a blanket, relaxing outside on a deck chair…it doesn’t matter what your body is doing so much as what your heart and mind are doing. Which brings me to my next point…
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2. Your Heart Posture Does Matter
Sometimes, it’s just hard to pray, isn’t it? We’re simply not motivated. And while this can often be caused by stress or simply cramming too many things into our calendars, it’s often because of un-confessed sin. If you’re caught up in habitual sin, you are probably not praying very much. That’s because—tough love here—you’re hiding from the Lord and from conviction, just like Adam and Eve did in the garden after the fall of man.
If we’re constantly falling prey to lust, greed, jealousy, worry, lies, or whatever else, we’re most likely not praying at all. The ironic thing is that frequent prayer is what helps us overcome those sins that are tripping us up! It’s a cycle and one you break with the Holy Spirit by engaging in regular prayer.
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3. You Don't Have to Close Your Eyes
On the way to school one morning when my daughter was young, she asked me to pray for her upcoming field trip that day. She was understandably dealing with a bit of anxiety, seeing how the last time she went on a field trip, she threw up and I had to come check her out mid-trip. Pretty traumatic for a kindergartener. She piped up sweetly from the backseat: “Can you pray for me, Mama? But don’t close your eyes, okay?” I promised her I wouldn’t and proceeded to pray for her field trip as requested.
It’s a cute story, but sometimes I wonder how legalistic we tend to make the act of prayer. We don’t close our eyes when we’re suddenly talking to a friend or family member in the room…so why do we do that when we talk to God? Obviously, there’s no prerequisite for that in the Bible. I think, in general, closing our eyes helps us focus because then we can shut out distractions around us. This can be a good thing, depending on your current environment. But what if we were to put into practice what a mentor friend of mine does, and when we go to pray, we just… start talking?
I’ll never forget the first time I saw him do this. My newlywed husband and I were sitting across the table from him at a coffee shop, and he offered to pray over our new marriage. We eagerly agreed, and as I automatically shuffled into position to start bowing my head and closing my eyes, I noticed him look slightly to the right of me and start praying. Eyes open, conversationally, just like he had been when he was talking to us. This makes so much sense to me, but it doesn’t come naturally. I challenge you to grow in this practice with me—it makes prayer feel so much more intimate, and God so much closer.
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4. You Do Have to Open Your Heart—and Calendar
It’s been said, “The thing you talk about the most is the thing you love the most.” This is true. I talk frequently about coffee, my Schnauzer, and CrossFit. (Ha!) What about you? Do you ever catch yourself talking about the things of the Lord? Are you eager to share an answered prayer or what God is doing/has done in your life with a friend or even a stranger? It’s okay to not feel like this all the time—that would be rare. But if you never feel that way, it might be because you’re not opening your heart and putting your prayers out there for God to answer. Or maybe you simply haven’t built the time into your day to pray. But since we already know we can pray anywhere, anytime, and with any posture, we’re without an excuse to stay silent. Start the new habit today, right now—and watch how God starts moving fresh in your life.
PS – If you’re unsure what to pray about, start with gratitude. Remember Paul’s gratitude sandwich in our opening verse? Just get in a habit of thanking God for the good day you’re having, the sunshine, the taste of your coffee, or the fact that you get to have dinner with a friend later. Start the conversation and don’t worry, because….
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5. You're Not Going to Get Prayer Wrong
Whew! Where are my fellow perfectionists? ::raises hand:: As Christians—especially those of us who have been practicing Christianity for most of our lives—it can be hard to have enough faith to pray. This seems backward, right? Like, wait a second…we’ve been a believer for a long time, we should have the most faith! We have journals full of answered prayers, but we also have journals full of tear-stained pages from the times that God didn’t answer—or rather, answered with a “No.”
Our faith often feels like a yo-yo, swinging up and down. We subconsciously figure that maybe not praying is better than praying and “getting it wrong,” or praying and being told "No." It’s almost like we’re trying to stay off God’s radar… which our minds know is silly but our trauma-triggered hearts greatly fear. Hear me, sister—you’re not going to get prayer wrong. You’re not going to mess up God’s plan for your life by praying the wrong thing.
Or maybe you’re afraid to pray because you mistakenly believe God can’t handle your honesty. For example, you know you should pray for a certain person who wronged you, but you’re not ready to forgive and are struggling to control your anger or bitterness against this person. Or maybe your anger is at God, instead, for not acting, or for allowing something to happen that caused you grief. If you’ve been in that position, you’re not alone. Just ask your neighbor. Ask me. Ask Job. Ask David, who got pretty riled up in quite a few psalms! God can handle your honesty, I promise.
And the best part is, when we’re real with Him, He starts the healing process. You can’t tend to a wound that is still hidden. So bring all your very real feelings into the light and start praying them out. Watch and see how God starts moving in your heart, softening, binding up, and soothing. It might not be overnight, but it will happen if you stay consistent. It’s impossible to stay enraged at someone after praying for them (which is why it’s such a good idea for spouses to pray together regularly!). And it’s impossible to stay mad at God when you’re talking to Him regularly.
Trust the process—and pray.
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Originally published Monday, 29 April 2024.
